


The Fundamentals of Caring

by Jang_BoRa



Series: The Fundamentals of Falling in Love [1]
Category: K-pop, Monsta X (Band), VIXX
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hospital, Angst with a Happy Ending, Codependency, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Flashbacks, M/M, Mind Games, Past Relationship(s), Psychological, Psychopathology & Sociopathy, Slow Burn, Sociopath Kihyun, Tags May Change, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-22
Updated: 2019-06-26
Packaged: 2019-06-27 13:33:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 45,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15686433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jang_BoRa/pseuds/Jang_BoRa
Summary: “I should tell you right now, Changkyun,” Minhyuk says, face serious, “having a relationship with Kihyun is hard. And being in love with him,” he smiles sadly, “well, that might just be the hardest thing you ever do,”“I know,” Changkyun responds, eyes trained on his coffee, “But I can handle it,”“I hope, for your sake, you can,”Changkyun promised himself he would never get involved with Kihyun again. But two years is a long time…Long enough to change your mind





	1. The Fundamentals of Hating You

_**Changkyun hurls the**_ flowers across the room while the phone rings,  
“I didn’t know you could throw like that,” Jooheon smiles from the armchair,  
“Not now, hyung,”  
“No, I’m serious. You could be a rugby player with that arm. Are you going to answer that, or?  
Changkyun takes a deep breath before storming over to the phone. He picks up and doesn't hesitate to voice his frustrations,

“Stop it with the flowers already!”  
He yells into the phone,  
“Do you not like them? I…I thought you loved lilies. They're casa blanca lilies too; you always said they were your favorite.”  
“No Kihyun, the flowers aren't the problem, they're actually quite beautiful, but I _don't want them_. I—"  
“That's fine. I can get you a different type. What kind do you like?”  
“I’ve recently taken a liking to apollo lilies and—wait, no, I’m getting sidetracked. I don't want _any_ flowers. At least not from you.”  
“Changkyunnie, don't be like that. Just—  
“And _stop_ calling me.”  
“Changkyun—"  
“No. Don't ever talk to me, don't call me, don't even _think_ about me, Kihyun. We're _over_ ,”  
“Kyun-”  
Changkyun hangs up, ruffling his lab coat in frustration,  
“Is he still trying?” Jooheon sips his coffee while looking at Changkyun knowingly,  
“You already know the answer to that. Honestly, how am I supposed to perform a surgery in an hour if I’m so worked up about this?”  
“You could give me the surgery,”  
“You would love that, wouldn't you hyung?” Changkyun scoffs,  
“Just a thought,”  
“Seriously though, what am I going to do?”  
“I suppose, this is just an idea don't get mad, I suppose you could see him,”  
“Are you out of your mind?” If looks could kill, Changkyun would be in prison for murder,  
“I knew you would get mad, I shouldn't have said anything,”  
“Hyung, you have the weirdest ideas. I hope you know that.”  
“I know, but just because they're weird doesn't mean they're bad ideas. You should think about it,”  
“I don't want to. I won't, not ever. I'm leaving, I have to prepare for surgery,”  
“Do whatever you want,”  
“See you later,” Changkyun heads for the door to leave, but he can't help thinking-  
“But hyung,” He pauses with his hand on the door handle, as if really considering it, “Do you honestly think I should see him again?”  
“I don't know, I guess? It might be good for both of you,”  
“Both of us?”  
“Yeah,” Jooheon shrugs, “It’ll give you both closure, and he’ll give up to go obsess over someone else. Preferably not someone we know,”  
“I suppose--”  
Changkyun's phone rings in his pocket,  
“Should I answer?” He holds the phone up for Jooheon to see. It's Kihyun. Again,  
“Do it,”  
“Hello?” Changkyun answers with a sigh,  
“Will you let me talk now?”  
“You have one minute. Go,” Changkyun glares at his watch,  
“Okay, I know I messed up. That I’m messed up,”  
“Yeah, you did and you are,”  
“I know. I know. I just… I miss you, I guess,”  
“You guess?” Changkyun just has to scoff, “This might be the first time I’ve ever heard someone guess that they miss me,”  
“That's not…forget it.  
“Listen Kihyun, I don’t know about you, but I don’t really have a lot of free time, so if you could get to the point a bit quicker, that would be much a appreciated,”  
“Right, sorry. It’s just, well, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently, like, a lot and my thoughts keep circling back to one thing…”  
“Which is?”  
“I’m not over you. And I don't think I ever will be,”  
“Well I hate to burst your bubble, Kihyun hyung, but what makes you think I ever want to see you again?”  
“Okay, that’s fair enough. But--”  
“Actually no, better question- why are you doing this now? It's been over two years Kihyun. Why do you miss me all of a sudden?”  
“I just-- it's not all of a sudden; I’ve been missing you since the day you broke up with me,”,”  
“I somehow find that incredibly hard to believe,”  
“That’s--”  
“Kihyun, can you make this a bit faster , I have to go into surgery in an hour,”  
“That's right, you're a doctor,”  
“Exactly, so hurry up. I’ve already given you a lot more of my time than I should have,”  
“Okay, okay. It's just- ugh, this went a lot better in my head.I just… I miss you, I miss seeing you,  
“Hyung I-”  
“It's--Don't say anything. Just--okay, my flight gets in at around two p.m, so--”  
“Flight?”  
“Yeah, I’m…um…I’m in Vienna right now,”  
“What are you doing in-- actually, I don't want to know, nor do I care, lso just finish what you were saying,”  
“Okay, well my flight gets in at two so, can you meet me at four? If you want of course,”  
“I guess four wouldn’t be so bad,” Changkyun tries to play it off like he's doing Kihyun a massive favor, even considering adding a nonchalant shoulder shrug for effect before remembering that Kihyun can't see him  
“Great. That--That's great, uh-”  
“Kihyun are you--are you nervous?” Changkun looks at the Jooheon in disbelief. There's no way he's nervous, is there?  
“No, no, I don't get nervous. It's just that, uhm, this was kind of a spur of the moment call, and I haven't really thought about what to say, so I’m just trying not to mess up,”  
“That… actually kind of made sense,”  
“Great, I don't sound insane.” There's a slight pause before he adds “So I’ll, um, I’ll see you at four? I can meet you at the hospital if you're okay with that,”  
“I suppose.”  
“Great…Great,”  
“Kihyun, you're being very strange right now,”  
“I don't-- yah! Don’t touch that!-- know what you mean,”  
“Kihyun, are you with someone right now?”  
“Depends what you mean; if by ‘with someone’ you’re asking if I’m currently in a relationship,” Changkyun blanches, hearing the smirk in Kihyun’s voice when he realises the other meaning of the question before Changkyun himself does, “ Then no. But if you’re asking if there is somebody else with me right now, then yes, why?”  
“You seem…distracted,”  
“No way, you have my full attention,” There's a beat of silence before he adds, “You always do,”  
Changkun can imagine what Kihyun's expression would be if they were face to face; his head would be lowered slightly while he looked up through his lashes. It somehow still made Changkyun's heart skip a beat even after two whole years,  
“You just can't help it, can you?”  
Changkun can feel Kihyun's shrug when he answers,  
“What can I say? You have that effect on me,”  
Changkyun swallows thickly,  
“Goodbye Kihyun,”  
“Bye Changkyunnie,” honey drips from his voice and Changkyun has to hang up before he says something he might end up regretting, ~~like 'I miss you'~~.  
“This is your fault,” Changkyun glares at Jooheon,  
“Don't be such a baby, what's the worst that could happen,”  
“What if I get murdered?”  
“Who's going to murder you? Anyone who tries will probably get beat up by Kihyun, and he's too worried about winning you back to think of murdering you. In less words, you'll be relatively safe,” Jooheon smiles reassuringly,  
“Relatively?”  
“Well,” Jooheon shrugs nonchalantly, “You are about to see your ex, who’s a sociopath, for the first time in about two years. He may not hurt you but it won’t be particularly easy,”  
“I suppose you’re right. Now stop distracting me, I’m going to be late for surgery,”  
“Whatever, go,”

 

* * *

 

 

“For love of-- Kihyun will you stop with the leg shaking, it's annoying,” Minhyuk sighs beside Kihyun, accepting the flight attendant’s offer of the water,  
“No Minhyuk, I want this to go perfectly,”  
“And it will, so unless this is part of some new workout regimen I’m not aware of,” He grabs Kihyun's thigh, “Stop with the shaking,”  
“Minhyuk,” Kihyun stares at him blankly,

“I’ve already had ten scenarios play out in my mind in which Changkyun totally dumps me. Two of which end with him punching me in the face,”  
“How many end well?” Minhyuk inquires, passing his water over to Kihyun before taking one for himself,  
“One. And a half,”  
“A half?”  
“I got through the whole dinner before he threw his wine in my face,”  
“Rough,” Minhyuk chuckles, glancing out the window. They're about to take off, at least that's what the pilot says, but Minhyuk trusts him. He makes sure to switch his phone to airplane mode and tells Kihyun to do the same, to which Kihyun responds with a ‘don’t tell me what to do,’ but complies anyway. Minhyuk smiles at his friends antics. Sometimes he wonders why, and how, he still puts up with Kihyun after all these years. He's almost glad that Kihyun's been so distracted by Changkyun recently that he's become (slightly) more tolerable. But despite that, not that he would ever tell Kihyun without a gun to his head, he honestly does hope that Changkyun will take him back, even with all of his problems and faults. Mainly because Kihyun's time with Changkyun had been the closest to happy Minhyuk had seen his friend of almost thirty years since—  
“Do you think he hates me?”  
Minhyuk snaps awake after being so close to finally falling asleep,  
“What?”  
“Changkyun. Do you think Changkyun hates me?”  
“Almost certainly,”  
“You could at least lie,”  
“Why would I?”  
“You're seriously no help,” Kihyun huffs, “I should have asked Hakyeon to come to Vienna with me,”  
“No you shouldn't have. He would only have distracted you. I, on the other hand, did not. I kept you focused on all the important things you had to do because I, shock horror, am not madly in love with you, unlike certain people,”  
“I hate it when you do that,”  
“Do what?”  
“Make more sense than me,”  
“After being stuck with me our whole lives I would have hoped that you would be used to it, but I guess some people never change,”  
“You're right, I haven't changed in years. The last time anything about me changed, I was fifteen,”  
“I thought you didn't like to talk about that,”  
“I don't. Unless I bring it up. And besides, if we're going to talk about me changing, we can't not talk about the worst year of my life,”  
“I suppose so,” Minhyuk sighs. It's not just Kihyun who doesn't like to talk about that year, Minhyuk hates the subject as well, even more so when Kihyun's the one who brings it up,  
“You don't have to look so guilty every time I talk about it,” Kihyun laughs at his friend, resting his head on his fist, “I keep telling you, nothing that happened that year was your fault. If anything it's my fault for being such an idiot and ignoring it when it had been happening. So seriously, stop blaming yourself for what happened to me Minhyuk. I have, haven't I?”  
“Yeah, but still—"  
“Nope,” Kihyun cuts him off, “But nothing. At any rate,” He sighs, “It's all happened already, regardless of whose fault it is. It's not like if you blame yourself for it that'll make it not happen. Let's just forget about it shall we?”  
“It's just—"  
“Shall we?” It’s very clearly not a request anymore and Minhyuk, having known Kihyun for his whole life, knows when to drop a subject. But just because Kihyun has told Minhyuk to stop talking about it, at least for now until he inevitably brings it up again, doesn't mean that Minhyuk won't keep thinking about it, because how can he not? Because he does feel guilty, he feels sorry to Kihyun. Because, in a way, he’s part of the reason Kihyun became what he did, he's half of the reason Kihyun broke. And even though Kihyun claims not to blame Minhyuk anymore, he knows there's still a part of Kihyun that does blame him, that thinks it his fault. It becomes most obvious on the nights when he lets Kihyun drink a little extra, too much even, and he starts cursing Minhyuk, telling him that it's his fault even though never specifying what he's done. But Minhyuk knows, even when Kihyun pretends nothing happened the next day, brushing his accusations off as ‘drunk words’. But isn't it that same Kihyun who will trick people into getting drunk in order to know how they really feel because ‘drunk words are sober thoughts’? So, despite Kihyun's best efforts to convince him otherwise, Minhyuk still blames himself for that one year. After all, he was the one who told Kihyun to trust Hyungwon, wasn't he?


	2. The Fundamentals of Forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What has Changkyun gotten himself into?

_**Why is it**_ that every time I go on any sort of trip with you,” Minhyuk complains, struggling to not topple under the combined weight of both his and Kihyun's luggage, “I somehow end up carrying both of our stuff?”  
Kihyun shrugs, sipping an iced tea. Minhyuk has set down the baggage before his arms fall off because A) he swears Kihyun never even took out _half_ the things in his _two_ suitcases (did he pack their entire house, what the hell?), and B)  
“We landed not three minutes ago, when and where did you get iced tea in a _cup_?” He stares at Kihyun incredulously,  
“I have my ways,” He says nonchalantly, scanning the crowds of people headed to and coming from places he couldn't care less about for--  
“What are you looking for? One of those suitcase trolley thingies we should have gotten before I was forced to carry whatever the hell you have in here?”  
“Don't be ridiculous,” Kihyun chuckles, “I’m looking for our driver,”  
“He has a name,”  
“He’s right, you know,”  
Kihyun sighs in defeat, letting Hakyeon hug him,  
“I hate when you two team up against me,”  
“So stop making it so easy,” Minhyuk smiles,  
“Nice to see you too, Minhyuk,”  
“Likewise. You brought the car right? Because all of this is heavy,” Minhyuk looks around, as if he's going to see the car from inside,  
“Yes, I brought the car Minhyukie, you no longer have to carry all the bags,”  
“Brilliant,” Minhyuk lets out a sigh of relief, “Do you have any idea how heavy his bags are? What does he even put in them,”  
“We all know Kihyun Isn't the lightest of packers,” Hakyeon holds Kihyun’s hand and smiles, “Isn’t that right, baby?”  
“What did you just call me?” Kihyun scoffs,  
“What--”  
“What makes you think I would ever let you call me that again?”  
“I just thought--“  
“Thought _what_? Hakyeon-ah, I don’t know how many more times I have to say this to you,” Kihyun pulls his hand away violently, “We are not dating. You're not my boyfriend so you don't get to call me that.” He pokes him in the chest harshly, “Got it?”  
“Got it,”  
Kihyun fixes him with one final glare before asking,  
“So, where's the car parked? I miss the house,” and wandering off to look for it, leaving Minhyuk and Hakyeon with the bags in the process,  
“Hyung,” Minhyuk lays a supportive hand on his shoulder,  
“It's fine,” Hakyeon sighs, “It was really my fault for saying it,”  
“You know hyung, you really don't need to keep hanging out with him. _I_ put up with it because we’ve been friends since before we could even speak, I know firsthand what he used to be like and that makes me more forgiving towards him because I know him on a level that most people no longer can. In short, he's my best friend.” Minhyuk frowns, “You, on the other hand, have absolutely no reason to stay by his side, he wouldn't even care if you left. So _why_? Why are you still here? Why do you let him treat you like this?”  
“I just--it's complicated,”  
“No it's not. It's simple but you're just too embarrassed to say it,”  
“I suppose so,”  
“We should probably go find Ki, he’ll get curious if we take too long,” Minhyuk starts off in the direction Kihyun went, before pausing to look at Hakyeon, “You know hyung, when we were kids, Kihyun had this bad habit of breaking all his toys. He would just smash them to pieces and they couldn't be fixed, so he would always throw the broken one away and get a newer, better one.”  
“Why are you telling me this?”  
“It doesn't take a genius to figure out that he still has that habit, even today. Just with a different kind of toy. My point is, please don't become another one of his toys,”  
“I won't,”  
Minhyuk smiles sadly,  
“Everyone else said that too,”

 

* * *

 

“I have no idea how you keep managing to convince me to do all of these ludicrous things, but you do,” Changkyun sighs, shrugging on his coat,  
“I keep telling you, it's because I know you secretly want them too, you just need a little push. Try the black jacket,” Jooheon had been such a friend to Changkyun as to go all the way back to their shared apartment and bring several changes of clothes for Changkyun to try before meeting Kihyun because he somehow knew that he would panic about it,  
“I suppose that's usually the case.” he turns to give Jooheon a view of his latest combination, earning a thumbs down, “But I can tell you this much; I was not expecting my Friday night to be spent like this. So how on earth did you rope me into it?”  
“I’m just a master negotiator, I guess. By the way,” Jooheon checks his watch, “aren't you supposed to meet Kihyun at four?”  
“Yeah. And?”  
“It's twenty past,”  
“What?” Changkyun grabs his phone off the desk and Jooheon’s right, it's twenty past four, “ _Shit_!” Changkyun puts on the first jacket he sees, making sure to put all of the necessary things into the pockets, and bolts out the door. Jooheon stares at the open door in complete bewilderment because, A) how can one person be so totally and utterly clueless, and B),  
“That's what he was wearing when we started this whole mess,” Jooheon sighs as he twirls miserably on Changkyun's wheelie chair.

 

* * *

 

  
“I always knew you weren't great with schedules, but _this_?" Kihyun suppresses a laugh, "This is almost comical,"  
“Don't even start,” Changkyun has to put his hands on his knees to support himself. The run from his office to the entrance wasn't even that long, but he was wearing a thick coat and he was _really_ sprinting, plus the last time he did anything close to a workout was that day they gave out free pretzels in the hospital cafeteria because they go fast and he was damn well getting one because they were _amazing_ ,  
“I’m touched by the fact that you felt the need to run just for me,”  
“Don't flatter yourself. I’m just not a fan of being late, even if it concerns people that I don't particularly want to see,”  
“If you didn't want to see me, why did you agree to this?” He doesn't wait for Changkyun to answer, he doesn't expect him to either, "I missed this," He sighs contentedly, breathing in the Seoul air, drinking in the atmosphere of the city, like he needs it to survive,

"Missed what? The city? Don't they have those in wherever you went?"

"Vienna, and yes they do. But it's not Seoul. There's just something about this place that makes me feel… _alive."_

Changkyun takes a sharp breath. He can't help it; he standing in front of Yoo Kihyun, the person who changed his life, after two years. He's standing in front of Yoo Kihyun, a person who could ruin his life and he'd never see it coming. He's standing in front of Yoo Kihyun, the sociopath he's in love with,  
“Where are we going?” Changkyun asks abruptly, very obviously trying to change the subject, and distract from his treacherous heart that has decided to beat a mile a minute, which Changkyun suddenly gets the sneaking suspicion that Kihyun can hear, given the sly grin he throws at Changkyun,  
“You're the same as always, I see,” Kihyun rolls his eyes with a fond smile, “Let's take a walk?”  
Changkyun frowns. Kihyun had this strange habit where he would turn a statement into a question,  
“I suppose we can,” Changkyun shrugs,

"Excellent,"  
He sets off without another word, leaving Changkyun to run after him. Almost like a lost puppy. Almost like two years ago. But not again, never again.


	3. The Fundamentals of Second Chances

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been all of two years since Changkyun last saw Kihyun. Now he's thinking even that wasn't long enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter and many future chapters, you'll see the term 'naltrex' used often. This stands for naltrexone, which is an impulse control medication.

_**“What would you**_ like, Changkyunnie?”  
Changkyun gets a shiver down his spine. The way Kihyun rests his head on his intertwined fingers and grins, as he practically _purrs_ the nickname, makes Changkyun shift uncomfortably in his seat. The coffee shop isn't as extravagant as he’d expected of someone like Kihyun, he wasn't expecting a coffee shop at all. The walls are a nice ivory color, with splashes of yellow and lined with overflowing bookshelves and large windows. It's open, no hiding space. The furniture is all beige and mustard on hardwood floors. It's actually quite plain, understated, and exactly what Changkyun would expect from Minhyuk, Kihyun's best friend who actually owns the quaint little coffee shop. The same Minhyuk who currently stands in front of their table, wearing the widest shit-eating grin Changkyun has ever seen, waiting to personally take their orders,  
“Surprise,” Changkyun eventually declares, earning an approving nod from Minhyuk and a surprised glance from Kihyun,  
“I guess we'll have two surprises,” Kihyun smiles, shooing Minhyuk away, “So what have you been up to lately?” Kihyun turns his attention to Changkyun after Minhyuk has departed,  
“Nothing much,” Changkyun shrugs, leaning back in his seat and staring out the window, trying to keep his gaze off of Kihyun's sickeningly sweet smile, or that expression that resembles love in Kihyun's eyes. Of course, Changkyun knows Kihyun too well to be fooled by that look. It got him once, but not anymore. It wasn't love, it was _hunger_ , the kind reserved for Kihyun and anyone else who treated serial heartbreaking and life-ruining as a sport. Kihyun wanted to chase him, wanted to catch him, but Changkyun wasn't playing his game anymore, he wouldn't play that game ever again,  
“No way, you can't possibly have not done anything interesting for two years,”  
Changkyun shrugs, he really hasn't done anything too interesting in all this time. He knows what Kihyun's really asking though; has he changed? Does he have any new strengths? Any new weaknesses?  
“Well, Jooheon and I moved about about a year ago,” He can see Kihyun's eyes light up at the prospect of new information, at how willingly Changkyun is going to give it up,  
“Sounds awesome. Where?”  
Changkyun shrugs  
“Somewhere nice enough. A little apartment up in Gangseo; not too small, not too extravagantly large. Between the two of us, Jooheon and I make more than enough money to afford the place. We like it there,”  
Changkyun can tell his words strike a nerve. Kihyun, being a fifth generation chaebol is definitely one for over-the-top extravagance, he himself living in a ludicrously large house (mansion more like) with Minhyuk, who also happens to be obscenely wealthy,  
“I’m sure it's lovely,” Kihyun's smile is cold, like the man himself, calculating. He doesn't seem to notice that he's dropped the act, allowed his real personality to leak through, until Minhyuk appears seemingly out of nowhere with their drinks,  
“Surprise,” He sing-songs, presenting two cups of precariously balanced, and violently trembling, hot liquids sat upon fancifully decorated saucers,  
“Minhyuk you are going to spill all of it, and I am not bringing you to the hospital if you burn yourself,” Kihyun scolds, rolling his eyes semi-fondly, and tenderly taking the saucers from Minhyuk lest he spill anything hot on himself, or anyone else for that matter. It feels weird for Changkyun, watching the two of them interact with each other, the familiarity of it all. And it's painfully obvious to him that this is not something that will ever become familiar to him, he’ll never experience this side of Kihyun for himself, he’ll never truly know him. Changkyun knows he’ll never know what's behind that mask that Kihyun wears, he’ll never know who Kihyun really is beneath all of his facades, he’ll never know Kihyun,  
“What about you hyung?”  
Kihyun looks up, surprised, clearly not expecting the question,  
“Just traveling.”  
“Where to?” Changkyun leans forward on the table, feigning interest. He’s pushing Kihyun, waiting for him to push back,  
“Everywhere. I came back from Vienna today, actually,” Kihyun shifts uncomfortably, clearly unused to talking about himself,  
“What was it like there? Vienna, I mean,”  
“It was absolutely gorgeous,” Minhyuk chimes in, eyes sparkling, “The streets, the city, the _people_ ,” He and Kihyun share a knowing look, though Kihyun seems slightly more agitated,  
“ _Minhyuk_ ,” Kihyun warns,  
“It appears I have overstayed my welcome. I will be leaving now,” Minhyuk chuckles nervously and does a little bow before heading back behind the counter to take care of the suddenly long line,  
“The people?” Changkyun sits back, quirking an eyebrow at Kihyun,  
“He’s just kidding,” Kihyun waves a dismissive hand,  
It's obvious to Changkyun that there is something Kihyun isn’t telling him, and he’s incredibly tempted to push him for it. He doesn’t, though, deciding that he’s done enough pushing for one day, and pretends to accept what Kihyun tells him,  
“What brings you back, then?”  
“What?”  
“To Seoul, I mean. You seem to really have liked Vienna, so what made you want to come back?”  
“You,” Kihyun says without missing a beat, and Changkyun has to resist the urge to roll his eyes,  
“Look, Kihyun, there appears to be some sort of miscommunication or misinterpreting of words, so I’m going to be as clear as I possibly can right now; I didn't agree to see you again, because I have any desire to have any sort of relationship with you. I don't want to be around you anymore,”  
“Then why did you even bother?” There's a scathing tone seeping into his voice, his eyes hardening,  
“It's was Jooheon’s idea,”  
“So you're the kind of person who just goes along with anything someone says?” Kihyun sits back and sips his coffee violently, and Changkyun realizes he's just painted himself into a corner. He can't say yes, lest he appear weak of mind. Because people like that are perfect prey for people like Kihyun. And if he says no, he’ll need another reason—which he does not have,  
“This is not about that,”  
“Then what is it about, Changkyunnie?”  
“Damn it Kihyun, do you have to call me that even when we argue?”  
“Why do you hate everything I do?”  
“Because I hate _you_ , Kihyun!” Changkyun stands up, knocking over his chair in the process,  
“Changkyun _sit down_ ,” Kihyun growls through gritted teeth, “people are staring,”  
“I’m sorry Ki, does that bother you? Does it bother you to have attention on you? You like going unnoticed, right? Because you can't ruin someone's life if you're in the spotlight, right?”  
“Changkyunnie stop it,”  
“You can't tell me what to do anymore, Kihyun.”  
Changkyun dips a finger into his coffee, checking the temperature, before throwing the lukewarm beverage in Kihyun's face,  
“I’m done with you,”  
Changkyun doesn't wait another second before storming out of the cafe, meaning he misses Kihyun's reaction. But Minhyuk doesn't miss a second of it. So when he hears the splash, it's followed moments later by a second splash as he drops the coffee in his hands (he’ll clean it up later) and races over to Kihyun’s table. Grabbing a handful of napkins, he makes quick work of wiping down the table before moving to Kihyun. He grabs him by the wrists and turns him so they face each other,  
“Kihyun,” He stares at Kihyun, his usual happiness forgotten, “Are you calm?”  
But Kihyun isn’t looking at him. Kihyun is gripping the table until his knuckles turn white, eyes closed and taking slow, shallow breaths,  
“Kihyun, look at me,” When he doesn’t respond Minhyuk shakes him violently and tries again, “ _Look at me_ ,”  
“What?” Kihyun snaps,  
“Did you take your meds today?”  
Kihyun stands up abruptly, eyes darting around the room,  
“No,” Kihyun bites out, turning towards the door, before Minhyuk grabs him by the wrist again,  
“You are _not_ going outside. Backroom, _now_ ,”  
Kihyun being his impulsive self, attempts to pull his hand away, but Minhyuk’s vice-like grip holds him in place,  
“If you think that I’m actually about to let you, you must be _insane_ on top of a sociopath. As well as thinking I’m a bad friend,”  
“You're _not_ my friend, Minhyuk!” Kihyun snaps, “I haven't liked you since high school, so leave me alone,”  
Minhyuk nearly does a double take. He's never heard Kihyun be so horrible to him. Tears well in his eyes and he has to wipe them away, trying to remind himself that Kihyun isn't thinking straight,  
“You don't mean that,” Minhyuk shakes his head, “You're being impulsive,”  
“Maybe I’m just being honest. I’m honest with Hakyeon, aren't I?”  
“But don't love Hakyeon, you don't even _like_ him. He's just a toy to you. But you love me,”  
“Minhyuk, you're being erratic right now. _Shut up_ ,”  
“I’m calling Hakyeon,” Minhyuk decides, taking out his phone, “And he's going to bring your naltrex and when you calm down you're going to say sorry to me, because I know you don't mean what you're saying,” He's barely pressed the call button when Kihyun snatches the phone from him,  
“Hello?”  
“Hey there Hakyeon, it's Ki, Minhyuk being a little bitch dog right now, and is trying to keep me prisoner in his dumb cafe because I didn't take my meds today. Please come talk some sense into him. Be quick, you know I’m not patient,” He hangs up before Hakyeon can get in a word and tosses it to Minhyuk,  
“What is wrong with you today Kihyun? You're never like this, even when you don't take your naltrex,”  
Kihyun rolls his eyes, leveraging Minhyuk distracted state and tearing his arm out of Minhyuk’s grip,  
“I’m leaving now. Bye,”  
Kihyun turns quickly and practically runs to the door, nearly makes it too, but Minhyuk is faster (he’s always been faster) and it's not even thirty seconds before he's pulled Kihyun into the storeroom at the back of the cafe and locked the door,  
“What are you doing?” Kihyun's agitated and Minhyuk knows there's about to be hell to pay, but he’d pay any price for Kihyun. Backing Minhyuk up again the door, Kihyun grabs the door handle but Minhyuk holds the door closed  
“I’m keeping you safe from you,”  
“How noble of you, but I don't need protection, especially not from me,”  
“Remember what happened last time I let you out when you didn't take your meds? Remember Yoongi?”  
Kihyun takes a sharp breath,  
“I _told_ you not to bring the up ever again. What is wrong with you?”  
“That's what I want to know about you, Ki. You're being meaner than usual. Is it because of Changkyun? Is that what this is?”  
Minhyuk’s feet slip out from under him after a particularly hard pull from Kihyun, sending the two of them sprawling. Kihyun tries to make a break for the door, but Minhyuk is quicker than him, he has to be, and grabs Kihyun by the ankle, keeping him on the floor, and pulls himself up to straddle Kihyun's back, pinning him to the floor. The door flies open, revealing a slightly distressed Hakyeon holding a syringe and two bottles, one of pills and one filled with a white substance,  
“Took you long enough,” Minhyuk quips, holding back the arms of thrashing Kihyun, “Why'd you bring those?” He nods at the empty syringe and bottle,  
“I had a feeling you would need it. And, judging by this situation, it looks like I was right,”  
“Do you want to be smug or do you want to help me?”  
“You know how it works,” Hakyeon grins, handing the syringe and bottle to Minhyuk,  
“And you know I hate having to do this,” They younger snaps, filling the syringe, “Sorry Kihyun,” Minhyuk says, trying to keep the older still. Holding him tightly, Minhyuk sticks the needle into Kihyun's arm and empties it, “Go to sleep, got to sleep, go to sleep,” He whispers gently as Kihyun slowly stops squirming underneath him until he's finally asleep. Minhyuk pulls himself away from Kihyun to crawl into the corner,  
“I’m sorry,” Hakyeon says eventually, “I know you hate having to do it. I should have—“  
“It's fine,” Minhyuk cuts him off, “Just as long as it gets done,”  
“I never thought…I thought we wouldn't have to use it ever again. I was planning on getting rid of the last of it today, actually,”  
“Well it's a good thing you didn't,”  
“We’re running out, by the way,”  
Minhyuk looks up at him questioningly,  
“Propofol, what we gave him, we’re running out,”  
“I told you to stop using that, we have to give him something else,”  
“We can decide on that later, but more importantly we need to know how to get it,”  
“He starts working in the hospital the day after tomorrow, we can get it from there,” Minhyuk says nonchalantly, moving to rest his head on his knees,  
“You want him to steal? Are you out of your mind?”  
“Relax, it's not like he hasn't done it before,”  
“Yeah, and he almost got kicked out of the last hospital for it.”  
“Well unless you have a better a solution, it's all we’ve got,”  
“I’ll think of something,”  
Minhyuk stands up,  
“Well, while you think, help me get him to the car, this stuff only lasts so long,”  
Hakyeon puts one of Kihyun's arms around his shoulder while Minhyuk takes the other,  
“We really should find another way to calm him down,  
“Well until we think of one this is the best we've got,” Minhyuk snaps.  
And he hopes that they can think of something and fast, because he doesn't want it to be the best they've got. He doesn't want to have to sedate his best friend when he gets violent. But it is all they've got, and if sedating Kihyun means he won't get himself into trouble, Minhyuk will do it. He's willing to do anything for Kihyun.


	4. The Fundamentals of Mistake Making pt.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What do you get when you mix Kihyun with two exes, a friend of an ex and two people who hate his guts? An average Sunday evening, of course

_**The next morning**_ finds Changkyun day-drinking a bottle of red wine in his and Jooheon’s kitchen, feeling like shit,

“Didn't anyone tell you not to drink in the morning?” Jooheon snatches the glass from Changkyun with a condescending dimpled grin,

“Go away, I’m day-drinking,” Changkyun whines, reaching out for his wine,

“Yeah, the expensive party wine too. What has gotten into you?”

"Alcohol,” Changkyun responds bluntly,

“Besides the daytime alcohol?”

“You know, studies show that seeing an ex after two years can invoke symptoms such as; daytime alcohol consumption, excessive sarcasm and irritability. I think we should call a doctor,”

“Those sound more like withdrawal symptoms,” Jooheon says worriedly, “You don't actually miss Kihyun, do you?”

“Don't be ridiculous hyung. Why would I miss him?”

“That's what I want to know. You look…heartbroken. I’m just worried about you Kyunnie,”

“Trust me hyung, he’s the ~~first~~ last person I’ll be missing anytime soon,”

“If you say so,”

“I do say so. Now please leave me to my morning alcohol consumption,” Changkyun reaches for his wine glass with a lazy grin,

“Whatever,” Jooheon rolls his eyes fondly and slides the glass over, “I’m going to work,”

“Okay. I mightn't be here when you get back, just a heads up,” Jooheon turns around abruptly with panic in his eyes,

“What?”

“Relax hyung, I have a life outside of you, you know,” Changkyun rolls his eyes at Jooheon’s dramatics, “Youngjae and Jaebum hyung moved recently so they're having a housewarming party,”

“Okay then, just don't stay out too late,” Jooheon calls, pulling on his shoes,

“Sure thing, mom,” Changkyun quips, downing the glass before pouring another another,

“And try not to give yourself alcohol poisoning, please,”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever,” Changkyun rolls his eyes, drinking the glass in just about ten seconds,

“Okay, that's it,” Jooheon marches over and snatches the bottle off the table, “No more wine for you,”

“Hyung,” Changkyun draws out the word,

“Nope. No wine,” Jooheon says, finality in his voice, re-capping the wine (yes, they buy resealable wine, it was cheaper and they don't drink that much anyway) and putting it into his briefcase,

“And now you have to explain to everyone in the hospital why you have a bunch of wine in your briefcase,”

“I’m willing to suffer the humiliation,” Jooheon says flatly, “If it keeps you safe,” He drops the two other wine bottles into his briefcase, (it's actually quite a large briefcase)

“But must you take all of the wine?” (Yes, they only own three bottles of wine. They really don’t drink)

“Yes, I must,” Changkyun huffs, “You're no fun,” he mutters under his breath,

“But I’m still alive, aren't I?” Changkyun rolls his eyes, “Try not to die, okay?” Jooheon asks as he leaves, locking the door behind him. Changkyun waits all of three minutes before huffing out a sigh,

“This won't do,” He says, remembering to grab his keys before heading out.

* * *

 

“Take your meds,” Is the first thing Kihyun hears when he wakes up,

“So bossy,” He mutters in reply, turning to face Minhyuk, “I haven't even opened my eyes yet. How did you know I was awake?”

“I’ve known you for what? Twenty five, thirty years? I can tell,” There's a brief silence before he adds, “I’m serious, take your naltrex right now. I want to see you do it,”

“Do you not trust me?” Kihyun chuckles, sitting up and grabbing the bottle of pills off the table anyway,

“After yesterday? Not a chance,” Minhyuk laughs, burying his face into the pillow, “You can take it dry if you want, but I suggest getting some water,” He comments,

“You know I hate dry swallowing pills,”

“Well then there's water downstairs,” Minhyuk drawls, pulling the bedcovers over his head, Kihyun rolls his eyes at his friend, heading down the stairs for a glass of water,

“Where's Hakyeon? He usually stays over at times like this,”

“I sent him home,” Minhyuk answers, following Kihyun, “I didn't feel any need for him to be here, he wasn't much help anyway,”

“Yeah, but--” He’s cut off by a ring, startling Minhyuk, “Relax,” He chuckles, “It's just my phone,” He doesn't bother to check who's calling him, so he isn't expecting the voice on the other end,

“Hello?” Kihyun eyes widen,

“Jaebum?” Minhyuk looks at him in shock, mouthing the name to a nod from Kihyun,

“H-Hey there Kihyun,”

“Hi. I wasn't expecting you to call me today. Or ever, really,” Jaebum chuckles,

“I wasn't really expecting to call you ever again either, so I guess we're even,” This makes Kihyun smile. They'll never be even,

“So, to what do I owe the delight of this sudden call?”

“Oh yeah, right,” Kihyun can tell he forgot what he was going to say, “Youngjae and I moved recently, about a week ago actually, we’re having a housewarming party tonight. I’d love if you could make it,”

“A housewarming party, huh?” Kihyun smirks, saying it more to Minhyuk than to Jaebum. Minhyuk shrugs and mouths, _sure_ , “When?”

“Later today. Six thirty,”

“We’ll be there,”

“You will?”

“Sure, why not?”

“Okay then,”

“You sound surprised. Were you not expecting me to want to come?” Kihyun slips the phone from his ear, turning it to speaker,

“Honestly, not really,” Jaebum admits. Kihyun laughs, filling a glass with water (bottled, naturally) and swallowing the naltrexone,

"Do you really have so little faith in me, Jaebummie?”

"What? N-no, no,” Minhyuk snorts at Kihyun's incredible ability to make people flustered,

“That's good to hear, I’d hate to think you don't have faith in me,”

“Of course, of course,”

“Is that everything?” Kihyun sighs, rolling his eyes and growing increasingly bored with this conversation,

“Y-yeah,”

“You still have that stutter, Jaebummie,”

“I g-guess I do,”

“It's cute,”

“G-goodb-bye Kihyun,”

“Bye Jaebummie,”

“You just can't help yourself, can you?” Minhyuk arches an eyebrow at Kihyun,

“We all have our habits,” Kihyun shrugs,

“Yeah, and yours appears to be going after taken people,” Kihyun shrugs again, tossing an apple at Minhyuk,

“You know how I am,”

“It's kind of boring in here, just the two of us,”

“So what’ll we do?”

“Well, we could go somewhere,”

“Or?”

“Or we can go back to sleep?”

“I like that idea,” The two of them nod, “I get the left side this time,” Kihyun declares,

“No fair,” Minhyuk pouts, chasing Kihyun up the stairs, “You got the left side last time,”

“But I was knocked out so I couldn't enjoy it,” Kihyun huffs, climbing under the sheets, on the right side, “Just this once,” he mutters,

“Aw, how sweet,” Minhyuk smiles, sliding in next to Kihyun on the left, right under the window with a cool draught in the summer and where they put the space heater in the winter, the perfect spot,

“Don't make me regret being nice,” Kihyun scowls with closed eyes. Minhyuk chuckles softly at Kihyun's antics, wrapping his arms around the slightly younger,

“You're so grumpy,”

“That's just who I am,” Kihyun sighs, rolling over to face Minhyuk,

“I wonder why I’m friends with you sometimes,” There's a short silence before Kihyun whispers,

“Promise you won't go anywhere?”

“You ask me this every night, Ki. I'm not going anywhere, I’ll be here when you fall asleep and I'll still be here when you wake up. Okay?”

“Okay. Just making sure. Goodnight,”

“Good _morning_ ,” Minhyuk corrects, smiling softly,

“Shut up,”

* * *

 

It's exactly six thirty when Kihyun rings the doorbell to Jaebum and Youngjae’s apartment,

“Only you would bring wine to a housewarming party,” Minhyuk rolls his eyes, commenting on the bottle of, quite frankly, overpriced white wine in Kihyun’s hands

“It's Jaebummie’s favorite,”

“But did you _have_ to bring the Riesling? You know that's my favorite. You're so mean to me,” Minhyuk pouts,

“We have plenty of it at home, Minhyuk. Can you relax?”

“But-” His complaint is cut off by the door swinging open,

“Hey ther-” Youngjae’s face face falls, “What are you doing here?” He glares at Kihyun with narrowed eyes,

“Jaebummie invited me, believe it or not,”

“I’m incredibly inclined _not_ to believe you,”

“Well that's just too bad, isn’t it?”

“Play nice,” Minhyuk says, already gearing up for a long night of damage control, “Hi there Youngjae,” He smiles, trying fruitlessly to diffuse the tension,

“Hi Minhyuk,” Youngjae doesn't take his eyes off Kihyun, “I am extremely tempted to tell you both to _leave_ , but I get the sneaking suspicion Jaebum hyung did invite you. I'm torn,”

"Well whatever you decide, make it quick,” Kihyun holds up the Riesling, “We have wine,”

“Come in!” Youngjae sarcastically beams, throwing the door wide open,

“Always a sucker for nice wine, aren't we Youngjae?” Kihyun smiles, brushing Youngjae shoulder as he strolls in, not by accident, “I would suggest that you chill it slightly before serving, but we all know you don't have the best taste, right Youngjae?”

“Kihyun, be nice,” Jaebum chides with a smile, moving to hug Kihyun,

“Nice to see you too, Bummie,” Kihyun gladly hugs him back, lingering a tad longer than strictly necessary when hugging somebody else's boyfriend,

“I would appreciate if you could keep your hands _off_ my partner,” Youngjae scowls, taking the wine from Kihyun, “Sweetheart, can you help me put this in the fridge?” Youngjae gives Jaebum a tight smile, “Ki-hyung suggested we chill it before serving,”

“What help do you need? You know where the fridge is and you can reach-“ Youngjae makes a series if facial expressions, silently indicating that it is not about the wine, “You know actually, that kitchen can be quite confusing,” Jaebum follows Youngjae into the kitchen, closing the door behind them. Kihyun turns, smiling, to two pairs of glaring eyes,

“Don’t look at me like that Wang,” Kihyun narrows his eyes at Jackson,

“You shouldn’t be here, hyung,” He says simply,

"Jaebum invited me,”

“Doesn’t mean you should have come. Besides, no one in their right mind would invite their ex to their housewarming party unless they were friends. You and Jaebum hyung are _not_ friends. You shouldn’t be here,”

“I couldn’t pass this up, it’s way too much fun,”

“Ki-“ Minhyuk is cut off by the ring of a doorbell. Youngjae throws open the kitchen door and storms over to answer the bell.

“Hey Youngjae,” The voice causes Kihyun to turn around, sounding strangely familiar. His suspicions are confirmed when Youngjae replies,

“Hi Namjoon. I’m guessing Jackson hyung invited you?”

“Yeah. Jaebum said he could,”

“Hi,” Kihyun smiles when Namjoon enters the room, stopping him dead in his tracks. And causing Changkyun to run into him, “And hi to you too, Changkyunnie,” Namjoon and Kihyun lock eyes and the next thing out of Kihyun’s mouth raises several questions for everyone in the room,

"It’s been a while. Hasn’t it, Joonie?”

 

* * *

 

 

“Why the _hell_ did you invite _him_?” Is the first thing out of Youngjae’s mouth when the door closes,

“Babe, you're overreacting,” Jaebum sighs (it’s more of a huff, really), “It's not a big deal,”

“Not a big deal?” Youngjae whisper-yells, “It is a _very_ big deal. Why would you do that? Who in their right mind would invite their ex to a housewarming party that their boyfriend is also going to be at? What is wrong with you?”

“I didn’t think anything of it at the time,”

"Clearly not. Because not only did you invite him, you _know_ I hate him,”

“Youngjae, don't be like this. Think of it a chance for you two to make pe-”

“ _Do not_ say ‘peace’. If he was just a random ex, I wouldn't care, we’re friends with some of your exes. But he's not just some random ex, hyung, you know that,”

“That was years ago, Youngjae,”

“I don't care if it was a century ago! It happened, hyung. Can you really, honestly look me in the eyes and tell me that you can look at that man and not even once think of what he did to you? What he could have done to you if you had given him the chance? Can you?”

“I can't," Jaebum sighs in defeat,

“Then why did you bring him here?” Youngjae scowls,

“I want us to be friends. And that ‘us’ includes you, Youngjae,”

“But why? Why would you want to be friends with a person who psychologically, emotionally, _physically_ abused you? Who almost _killed_ you hyung?

“He did more than that Youngjae, and you know it. I wouldn't be who I am right now if it weren't for him. I probably would have gotten myself killed. I know he's destructive, okay? I know,” He takes Youngjae’s hands tenderly in his, “But he also has this amazing ability to fix people, to make them better. He made _me_ better. So, even just for my sake, can you at least try not to antagonize him?” Youngjae sighs, glaring at his and Jaebum’s intertwined hands,

“I-” He's cut off by the sudden ring of the doorbell, “This isn't over,” He warns, tearing his hands out of Jaebum’s grip and throwing open the kitchen door. He opens the front door violently (a bit dramatically, if you ask him) and is greeted with the dimpled smiling face of Kim Namjoon,

“Hi,” he beams, radiating a positive energy that infects and dispels all of Youngjae’s current agitation,

“Hi Namjoon. I’m guessing Jackson hyung invited you?”

“Yeah. Jaebum said he could,”

“Of course, you're always welcome,” he adds, under his breath, “unlike some people,”

“I would hope you aren't referring to another person with dimples who is standing right here,” Changkyun pipes up from behind Namjoon, laughing,

“Absolutely not Changkyun.” Youngjae chuckled at the older’s strange sense of humor, “Just a certain person whom I don’t particularly enjoy the company of. Come in,” Youngjae distracts himself from the on oncoming rant and/or migraine by opening the door wide to let the two in,

“Hi,” he hears from the living room, rolling his eyes at Kihyun,

“Kihyun don't-” Youngjae cuts himself off, having walked into a standstill, with Kihyun and Namjoon staring at each other,

“It's been a while, hasn't it Joonie?”

Wait, what?

 

* * *

 

 

"Would anyone care to explain?” Jackson is the one to break the ~~awkward~~ , tense silence, naturally,

“Youngjae, you might want to bring out the wine,” Kihyun comments, sitting down casually,

“The Riesling?”

“Maybe something lighter,”

"I think we have some rosé in the wine cabinet,” Jaebum adds,

“Excellent, bring that,” Kihyun waves Youngjae off and the younger scowls but heads to the kitchen anyway,

“So, judging by the _daggers_ Namjoon is shooting at you right now,” Jackson smirks, "I’d guess the two of you aren’t the best of friends,”

“You guessed right,” Namjoon says, sitting as far away from Kihyun as possible,

“Is he on good terms with _anyone_?” Changkyun quips, taking a seat next to Namjoon,

“I assume you hate him too?”

“Ding ding, we have a winner,”

“Why is everyone ganging up on me today?” Kihyun whines,

“You bring these things upon yourself, really,” Minhyuk comments, sitting next to Kihyun and throwing his legs onto his lap,

“How are you even friends with him?” Namjoon asks Minhyuk,

“Sometimes even I wonder,” He sighs in response,

“I’ve got the wine,” Youngjae announces, entering the room, brandishing a bottle of Rosé. He sits on Kihyun’s left, between him and Jaebum, and shoots the older a glare,

“Only you would forget the glasses. What, do you want us to drink out of the bottle?” Kihyun chides, rolling his eyes,

“Shut up hyung,” Youngjae growls, disappearing into the kitchen,

“Can we stay in topic please? Kihyun, exactly how do you know Namjoon?” Jaebum asks,

“Well, it’s a long story. You see-“

“It really isn’t,” Namjoon cuts him off, “He dated one of my friends,” He says simply, robbing Kihyun of his dramatic flare,

“I mean, if you want to simplify it like that,” Kihyun rolls his eyes, “But that’s no fun,”

“I feel like there has to be more to it than that,” Youngjae says, returning with seven wine glasses, “There’s no way you’re looking at him because he just went out with one of your friends. I mean, it’s not like you started dating him and then he invited him to your housewarming party. _Right_ Jaebum hyung,” Youngjae fixes Jaebum with a death glare unfitting of the typically happy male,

"You know Youngjae. It’s not my fault you seem to be so insecure,” Kihyun says nonchalantly,

"I took the wine already so why I have yet to ask you to _leave_ is beyond me,”

“Kihyun stop it,” Minhyuk scolds,

“Well, seeing as how there appear to only be two people in this room who don’t hate Kihyun, am I right to assume we all know what happens when Kihyun hyung dates people?” Youngjae asks, retaking his seat between Kihyun and Jaebum. The statement is followed by five yeses,

"So I take it we’re all on the same page then?” Kihyun asks, picking up the wine, answered by a handful of nodding, “Great. Now, believe it or not, I’m actually not here to piss everyone off. So now that everything is clarified, let’s pop some bottles and get this party started. What do you say?” Kihyun’s somewhat sudden and perplexing good mood is answered with a series of, not quite so enthusiastic agreement, “Great. Youngjae-yah, I assume even you know to own a wine opener?” Youngjae visibly bristles at the comment,

“Of course,” He smiles through gritted teeth, “I’ll help you find it,” He stands and heads for the kitchen, followed by Kihyun.

  

 

“Exactly what do you think you're doing?” He snarls, closing the door behind him,

“I’m just looking for a wine opener,” Kihyun frowns innocently,

“I mean _here_. What are you doing _here_?”

"Do you not want me here?”

“Absolutely _not_.”

“Youngjae, you wound me,” Kihyun places a dramatic hand on his heart,

“Kihyun, I don't know what you're up to, but-”

“Can you _relax_? I'm not up to anything,” Youngjae narrows his eyes at the older,

“Why do I not believe you?” Kihyun shrugs,

“How would I know?” He rummages through the drawers, “Honestly though, I really have no plans for you or Jaebummie,”

"So why did you come?” He shrugs again,

“Thought it would be fun. Here it is,” he declares, brandishing the wine opener, “You wouldn't mind bringing the Riesling, would you?” He starts to walk out, but Youngjae grabs him by the wrist,

“Look Kihyun, I’m not entirely sure _why_ you wanted to come-”

“I told you, I thought it would be fun,”

“-But, I know there is _no way_ I’m letting you near Jaebum hyung again. I'm not giving you the chance to ruin him again,”

“Think whatever you like, Youngjae,” Kihyun tears his hand from Youngjae’s grip violently with a scowl, “But I really don't have any interest in Jaebummie. I’ve found someone I actually like,” He throws open the door, “Don't forget the Riesling,” he calls, “Maybe bring some Preseco while you're at it,”

 

* * *

 

 

“I think you should go home,” Kihyun says when he has to catch a laughing Changkyun for the third time because the younger is too unstable on his feet,

"Hyung, you're such a party-pooper,” Yugyeom calls from the floor, he and Bambam having arrived after the third bottle,

“That's the title that comes with being the only sober person in the room,”

“Boo,” Bambam jeers, “Even uptight Jinyoung hyung is smashed,”

"I am _not_ uptight,” Jinyoung slurs from his spot on the sofa between Namjoon and Jackson,

“Yeah, he’s not uptight,” Youngjae agrees. Jinyoung is about to thank him when he adds, “He’s just got a stick up his ass, that’s all,” Jinyoung throws a bag of peanuts at him,

“Don’t waste food, hyung,” Yugyeom scolds, picking a peanut off the floor and eating it,

"See hyung,” Changkyun says, swaying slightly,

”But aren’t you kind of tired?” Minhyuk asks, faking a yawn, “I know am,” he shoots Kihyun a look. Kihyun, having gotten that look many time, knows what it means, ‘ _you owe me for this’_ ,

“Me too,” Youngjae chimes in, earning a surprised look from Kihyun and Minhyuk. He feels bad about it, not oblivious to their plot in the least, but he just wants Kihyun away from Jaebum, and hopes that even Kihyun knows when to draw a line or two, “It is quite late,” Changkyun frowns,

“Maybe I should go home. I am quite tired, now that you mention it,”

“I told you so,” Kihyun chides, “Go get your jacket, I’ll drive you,”

“I can drive myself, thank you very much,” Changkyun protests, stumbling off to retrieve his jacket and returning with one that may, or may not, be his,

“No you can’t,” Kihyun says, snatching Changkyun’s car keys, “You are so heavily intoxicated that I wouldn’t trust you to drive in Mario Kart,” He herds Changkyun to the door,

“Try not to crash my car on your way back,” He asks Minhyuk, tossing him his car keys,

“I payed for the car,” Minhyuk grumbles, just barely managing to catch the keys, “It’s technically mine,”

lIt was a present,” Kihyun reminds him, “Of course you payed for it,”

“Make sure you practice safety,” Minhyuk calls after the two. Kihyun flips him off, well aware that he's not talking about driving,

 

"I’m sleepy,” Changkyun Mutters for the fourth time,

"So just sleep already,” Kihyun replies, for the fourth time, “I’ll wake you up,”

“I don't trust you,” Changkyun turns his head away from Kihyun, looking out the window,

"I guess that's just your problem then,” Kihyun shrugs,

"Why did you come back? To Korea,” Changkyun closes his eyes, “You shouldn't have come back. You should have stayed away. From me, from Jooheon, from Jaebum hyung. Everyone,”

"I couldn't,”

“Couldn't? Or wouldn't?”

“ _Couldn't_ ,” Kihyun clarifies, “I don't think you fully appreciate how totally crazy about you I am,”

“And I don't think you appreciate how much I totally hate you,”

“I don't think you have any good reason to, though,”

"Why do you say that?”

“I haven't done anything to make you hate me personally and I’m a generally likeable person,”

“When you aren't manipulating and exploiting other people,”

“*Of course, like that*. Same difference,”

“But it's not the same thing, hyung,” Changkyun says, clearly drifting into sleep, “And that’s another problem I have with you; not only are you problematic, but you don’t realise exactly how problematic you are,”

“You know, I-” Kihyun turns his head to look at the sleeping Changkyun, “Why do I do this to myself?” He sighs,

 

* * *

 

 

"Why can't I be happy too?” Changkyun hears when he wakes up, still very much intoxicated, and noticing that they have stopped moving,

“What?” He asks,

”Oh, you're awake,” Changkyun frowns. Was Kihyun not talking to him? “I just mean, everyone else around me seems to be perfectly happy. So why not me too? Who's to say that I shouldn't be happy too?”

“No one,” Changkyun sighs,

“What?”

“No one says that you _shouldn't_ be happy. It's when that happiness is at the expense of others,”

“So I shouldn't be happy if it makes someone else be not happy?”

“Exactly,” “But then they're happy and I’m not,” Kihyun frowns,

“Maybe, but that's okay. That's how being altruistic works, sacrificing your happiness for someone else's,”

“So then that person is selfish?”

“What? No! It's--forget it,” Changkyun cuts himself off, realizing that the concept of altruism is probably lost on someone like Kihyun,

“You might be the most philosophical drunk I’ve ever seen,” Kihyun laughs. Changkyun hasn't heard that laugh in almost two years, so he only now realizes how much he missed it. How much he missed Kihyun. It's easier to admit it to himself while drunk. He misses Kihyun, even sitting beside him like this, he misses him. Wants to be near him again. Whether it's these thoughts or the large amounts of alcohol he’d recently consumed that propel his next move, Changkyun isn't sure. Regardless of which one it is, Changkyun is uncharacteristically sure of himself when he leans over the gearshift and calls,

“Hyung,” And when Kihyun turns his head, Changkyun doesn't waste a second (he's wasted enough time as it is) in connecting their lips. For Kihyun, the kiss is a surprise, slow and sweet and tasting of Prosecco, and he realizes how unfamiliar he and Changkyun had become.

But for Changkyun it's so much _more_. It's  electrifying and intoxicating all at the same time. Kihyun is just so incredibly addicting to Changkyun, like his own personal brand of nicotine and somehow Kihyun managed to constantly taste like cinnamon and vanilla, even when he drank, it was vexing to Changkyun. _Kihyun_ was vexing to Changkyun. Whether it was the kiss or all that wine, Changkyun didn't really care, his brain was going up in fireworks, his heart beating a mile a minute. He was suffocating, not from lack of oxygen, but from Kihyun. And he loved it. He wanted to be with Kihyun forever, in this moment, never leave him, make everything about _him_. When the two finally pull away after what feels like a lifetime, Kihyun rests his forehead against Changkyun's, smiling,

"I missed this,” he says,

“I missed you,” Changkyun answers,

“I thought you hated me?”

“Meh,” Changkyun shrugs, “I don't know, I’m kind of taking this a day at a time,”

“And how do you feel today?” Changkyun shrugs again,

“Happy,”

“That makes me happy. You make me happy,”

“This is such pillow talk,” Changkyun giggles,

“Speaking of pillows,” Kihyun pulls away fully, “You should go home now,” he sighs,

“Don't want to,” Changkyun whines, “I want to stay with hyung,”

“Changkyun, you're drunk, you should go home,”

“No,” Changkyun pouts, taking Kihyun's face in his hands and turning his head to look at him, “Don't you want to stay with me?” He asks, kissing Kihyun quickly. Kihyun stares at him for a good minute or so before five sighing,

“I must be insane,” Kihyun mutters, turning his key in the ignition and backing out of the driveway.

 

* * *

 

 

The morning delivers throbbing headaches and warm blankets to Changkyun. He rolls over with a groan, tempted to call in sick to work and spend the rest of the day nursing his hangover in bed, even if Jooheon will yell at him. Actually, why wasn’t Jooheon _currently_ yelling at him? And, wait a second, was this even his bed? And-

“This is why you shouldn’t drink so much,” A voice chastises. Changkyun sits up sharply because he would recognise that voice anywhere, even hungover and freshly woken up. But rather than Kihyun, once Changkyun’s head stops spinning long enough for him to open his eyes, all Changkyun sees is a vaguely familiar silhouette of someone closing the door behind them. Frowning, he attempts to get out from under the covers and follow them. Keyword being ‘almost’. The moment he stands up, Changkyun is hit with a wave of dizziness that sends him sprawling back onto the bed. Turning his head slightly, ignoring the pounding behind his eyes, Changkyun notices a small box of aspirin next to a glass of orange juice (at least, hopes they’re what they appear to be) on the bedside table. But, not being bothered to try and look closer at them, he lets himself fall. Back onto the bed and back asleep. Letting his mind go blank, not thinking of anything (of Kihyun), even if for only a short time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *When Kihyun says "Of course, like that. Same difference," he's talking about the Korean words for 'of course' (그럼) and 'like that' (그런) which are almost exactly the same,


	5. The Fundamentals of Mistake Making pt.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changkyun wakes up with a throbbing headache and half a night of missing memories 
> 
>  
> 
> Changkyun realises that Kihyun might not be who he thought he was

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Turns out that getting your hair done is a very conducive environment for finishing chapters that you haven’t actually started. Who knew?
> 
> (Really sorry this is so late)

**_Changkyun screws his_** eyes shut at the light streaming through the curtains. The brightness hurting his still sensitive eyes. He's almost about to go back to sleep, spend the rest of the day curled up in bed, when the smell of food drifts up to his nose. Is that…? Is that _eggs?_ There's no way Jooheon would make _eggs_ for him. Taken over by curiosity, all thoughts of sleep forgotten, he peels himself off the mattress in to search for the source of the mouthwatering scent. It's only passing by the mirror after having fully gathered his senses, that he notices two things: 1) that this is definitely _not_ his room, and by extension, his house, and 2) glancing in the mirror he stops dead in his tracks, yawn dissipating in his mouth, lowering his arms. He notices the purple bruises littering his neckline, trailing down his torso and making a stop right at the waistband of his jeans. He frowns deeply at his current state, then at the small post-it note plastered to the edge of the mirror,

  

             _Relax. Last night was strictly_

_above the belt, I promise._

_Don't you trust me?_

_-Kihyun_

 

The note only serves to deepen Changkyun’s frown. Why, and more importantly, how, is Kihyun leaving him notes? Unless…no way. Changkyun yanks open the door and runs (wobbles is more accurate) down the stairs, clinging to the banister every step of the way. Following the smell of food leads him into the most gorgeous black and white marble kitchen he has ever seen, with no shortage of gold accents. Completing this strangely picturesque scene, though, is none other than Yoo Kihyun, with his back turned to Changkyun and, sure enough, frying eggs,

“Please explain,” Changkyun says, sliding warily into the seat at the island,

“Oh, you're awake?” Kihyun turns to him with a smile, “How are you feeling?”

“Hungover,” Changkyun responds bluntly, “Is this your _house?”_ He asks in amazement, looking around,

“All mine. Well, that's not entirely true, I share it with Minhyuk. But the kitchen is mine, I won't let him near it, seeing as how I like having my house not burned to the ground,” Kihyun chuckles, “What do you think?”

“It's amazing, but why am I here?”

“You don't remember?” Kihyun frowns, sliding a plate watermelon in front of him,

“No,” Changkyun shakes his head, eyeing the watermelon suspiciously,

“What are you, worried that I’ve poisoned it or something? Don't eat it if you want,” Kihyun shrugs, taking a slice, “It's your loss,”

“I’m going to be honest Kihyun, being around you is like being in a gas station bathroom,”

“How sweet of you,”

“What I mean is, no matter how many worrying things there are, I can only really raise one concern at a time. So yes,  I _am_ worried about what you _might_ do to me, but I’m more concerned about what you did last night,”

“Did you not read my note?”

“I did. I just highly doubt that’s all there is to it,”

“You don’t even trust me to know which lines not to cross?”

“Not particularly,”

Kihyun frowns,

“Are you hungry?” He asks sullenly, changing the topic,

“No,” Changkyun slides out from the table, “I’m leaving,”

“Do whatever you want,”

“I will,” Changkyun turns on his heel, heading for the stairs,

“I wouldn't put that shirt back on if I were you,”

“Why?” Changkyun looks back at him,

“I mean, this is just a suggestion, but I find that it's not very pleasant to wear shirts that are covered in vomit,”

“ _What?_ ”

“Okay, you don't remember that either. Is there anything you do remember?”

“I don't really remember anything after we left,”

“That's to be expected. You did have a lot to drink,”

“Right,” Changkyun nods slowly,

“If you want,” Kihyun sighs, “You can steal one my shirts. Consider it a tax of sorts,”

“A tax?”

“For not just taking you home,”

“Just a shirt wouldn't even _begin_ to cover a tax like that,” Changkyun scoffs,

“It's a start,” Kihyun shrugs, “especially considering that I should lower that tax significantly,”

“And why is that?”

“Because, believe it or not, though I doubt you'll believe me, you were practically _begging_ me for it last night. But I was too much of gentleman,”

“I am extremely inclined to not believe you,”

“Think whatever you want, Changkyun,”

Changkyun doesn’t respond, turning and heading up the stairs.

 

* * *

 

Once upstairs, Changkyun takes the opportunity to do some snooping. He can't help it, the house is different than he remembers. It's bigger too; the last time Changkyun was ever in Kihyun's house, two years ago, it definitely didn't look like this. There are a lot more rooms, and Changkyun swears that the interior designer of this house was given a color palette with exactly four colors on it. All of the furnishings, decor and paint are either white or black with rose gold or gold accents. In other words, it's an egregious and obnoxious display of wealth, and it's exactly something Changkyun would expect from Kihyun. Rummaging through his closet, Changkyun finds a pale pink sweater that looks strangely familiar.

 

“Kihyun?” Changkyun calls, coming down the stairs,

“Yes, Changkyunnie?”

Changkyun scowls at the name,

“Is this… _mine?”_ He asks, holding up the sweater,

“Probably. Most likely, seeing as how I don't remember actually buying that and we used to share clothes all the time,”

“Do you have anymore of my clothes that I’m not not aware of?”

“I don't think so,” Kihyun shrugs, “I’ll let you know if I find any,”

“Forget it,” Changkyun shakes his head, “Don't do that. Even if you find something that's mine, just…keep it,”

“But--”

“I’m serious Kihyun.” Changkyun sighs, pulling the sweater over his head, “Not just for something as trivial as clothes, don't contact me again. _Ever_ again,”

“Changkyunnie, let's not talk about this right now,”

“No, we should talk about this right now. I'm not sure if you’ve suddenly forgotten how to speak Korean, or if you're being willfully ignorant and I don't really care, so I am going to say this very slowly and in the simplest terms I can think of,” Changkyun places his hands on the island and looks Kihyun directly in the eyes, “I do not want _anything_ to do with you. I don't want you in my life, nor do I want any part of yours, okay? And I am _done_ with your twisted little mind games and manipulation, and I am done with _you._ Do you understand me, Yoo Kihyun?”

“Got it,” Kihyun answers, frowning,

“Don't look at me like that,” Changkyun sighs, “I want you to be happy, I honestly do, even though I don't like you. _But_ I don't want you around me, at all,”

“Why?”

“What?” The question catches Changkyun off guard,

“Why do hate me? Was what I did really _that_ bad?”

“Hyung, what you did was a form of psychological and emotional abuse so yes, it was that bad. I have to go or I’m going to be late,”

“So I guess this is goodbye?”

“Goodbye hyung. I mean it this time,”

Changkyun frowns, pauses with his hand on the door,

“I meant what I said. I really do want you to be happy, it's just that I can't be happy with you,”

“Changkyun-ah,”

“What?”

“Catch,” Kihyun throws a pair of keys at Changkyun, who catches them easily,

“Why?”

“You need to get home don't you?”

“You know how to drive,” Changkyun raises an eyebrow, tossing the keys back to Kihyun,

“You're a new man, Changkyun,”

“No, I’m just too hungover to drive right now,”

Kihyun laughs,

“One last joyride?”

Changkyun scoffs, rolling his eyes only semi-fondly.

 

* * *

 

 

_2 years ago…_

 

_“Why are you being like this to me?”_

_“Because you're lying to me, hyung, and you know it,”_

_“Changkyunnie, babe, let's not talk about this tonight,” Kihyun extends his arms to hug Changkyun, “How about I make us something extra nice for dinner and we can cuddle, and just forget about this,”_

_“_ Do not _touch me,” Changkyun pushes Kihyun away harshly, “This is_ not _going to go away if you just pretend it didn’t happen. Hyung, I need you to answer me, and be honest; was that hyung telling the truth? Did you really do that him_ _?”_

_“Why do you care so much?” Kihyun asks, frustration seeping into his voice, “Why do you care so much what Min Yoongi, of all people, says?”_

_“I care because I need to know if you would hurt someone like that. I have to know,”_

_“What difference does it make? If I did it or not?”_

_“It makes all the difference, because if you did then you're not the person that I thought you were,”_

_Kihyun sits down on the couch,_

_“And who did you think I was?”_

_“I thought you were kind,” Changkyun sits down next to him, “and selfless, and caring, so_ so _caring, and you have the most amazing personality. I'm sometimes surprised at how you can fit such a large personality into such a small body,”_

_“Hey now,” Kihyun giggles, slapping Changkyun on the chest lightly,_

_“And so amazingly talented,” He continues, ignoring Kihyun, “And definitely not the kind of person that tries to kill people,” he adds with a frown,_

_“I take it that you aren't going to let this go,”_

_“Not until you give me the truth,”_

_“I don't know what you want me to say, Changkyun,” Kihyun groans, standing up and going to the kitchen, “How many times must I tell you that I didn't do it?”_

_“Until I start to believe it,”_

_“Do you want to know what I think?” Kihyun scowls, turning on the kettle and putting two spoonfuls of coffee into a mug, “I think that you don't want the truth. I think you just want me to tell you that I did it, regardless of whether or not I did,”_

_“That's not true, hyung, I want to know the truth. Just be honest with me, please,” Changkyun eyes well with tears, “please,”_

_“What do you want me to say? That I did it? Fine, I did. I did it, okay? Yoongi was telling the truth, I got us into the crash on purpose and I tried to kill him. Are you satisfied now?”_

_“Did you really?” Changkyun holds Kihyun's hands tightly, “Are you telling me the truth?”_

_“You wanted me to be honest, so I am,”_

 

_Changkyun cries. He cries because he had hoped that he was wrong. He knew, from the moment he saw the burns on Yoongi, he knew that Kihyun did it, would do something like that. In that moment, his fantasy was shattered. And it confirmed the other suspicion that had been lurking in his darkest of 1am thoughts,_

_“You’ve been gaslighting me, haven't you?”_

_“_ What? _First of all, I need you to stop crying,” Kihyun reaches out to wipe away Changkyun's tears, but he slaps Kihyun's hand away,_

_“Answer me! You have, haven't you?”_

_“Are you out of your mind? No I have not been gaslighting you,”_

_“You doing it right now!” Changkyun laughs humorlessly, “You’ve been doing it for the past two months now,”_

_“Babe, you're being ridiculous. So how about we have some coffee, then we can calm down and talk about this when we're both in our right minds, okay?” He smiles gently, opening a cabinet to get a second mug,_

_“Do you even love me?”_

_The mug falls, shattering on the floor,_

_“What the fuck kind of question is that?!”_

_Changkyun flinches,_

_“I’m sorry, that was a bit much. Just, what makes you ask that?” Kihyun asks, in a softer voice,_

_“More 1am thoughts,” Changkyun shrugs,_

_“Okay, so no coffee for you. How about some warm milk?”_

_“Baby, please answer me,”_

_“Of course I–” Kihyun cuts himself off, taking Changkyun's hand and pressing it to his chest, “Do you feel that?”_

_“Yeah, it's your heart,”_

_“That's right. And do you feel the way it's beating?”_

_“Uh huh,”_

_“It's beating for you, and only you. Unequivocally, irrevocably, unconditionally. Now, I need to know, since we're reaffirming our love, do you love me?”_

_“I fell in love with the person I met in that bar a year ago,”_

_“So…me?” Kihyun asks,_

_“_ But… _but I don't know if you're that man anymore,”_

_“What are you talking about? I'm still the same person I was a year ago,”_

_“No you're not,” Changkyun shakes his head, “I’m not sure if he ever even existed,”_

_“Changkyunnie, what has gotten into you?”_

_“Reality,” he sobs, “I’m finally seeing reality,”_

_“Changkyunnie, can you relax?”_

_“Relax? You want me to_ relax? _How can I?! I’ve just found out that my boyfriend, who has been been gaslighting me for two months, tried to kill someone,”_

_“Baby please, can we not do this right now?”_

_“Fine,” Changkyun scowls, tearing his hand away from Kihyun violently, “We can talk about this later. Like tomorrow,” he snatches his keys off the coffee table,_

_“Where are you going?” Kihyun frowns, “What about your milk?”_

_“I’m going to Jooheon’s, don't follow me and don't wait up,”_

_“You’ll be back tonight though, right?” Kihyun follows him to the door,_

_“No, I will not. I’m coming back tomorrow afternoon, and then we can_ talk,”

_Changkyun doesn't wait for Kihyun to respond, closing the door harshly._

_Kihyun waits all of ten seconds before returning to the kitchen to finish making his coffee. He adds three spoons of sugar and takes a slow sip. He manages to hold the mug for five whole seconds before hurling it across the room, piping hot coffee and all. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and calls the one person that he has on speed dial,_

_“Hello?”_

_“Hey Minhyukkie,”_

_“Oh hey Kihyun, what's up?”_

_“You didn't cancel those plane tickets, did you?”_

_“No, why?”_

_“I might be changing my mind about that extended trip that you were talking about,”_


	6. The Fundamentals of Starting Over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please be aware that I am not a medical professional. Though I have done as much research as I can, I can’t be sure that I got everything right. So feel free to tell me if I’ve gotten anything wrong

_**“Where did you**_ go last night?”

“Not so loud,” Changkyun whines, slipping on his lab coat, “My head is still throbbing,”

“Sorry,” Jooheon winces, “But what kind of super hangover has you holding your head in pain until 12pm? Did you go to a college frat party or something?”

“No, but copious amounts of alcohol are pretty much the only way to make Kihyun tolerable,”

“Kihyun? Was he there? Why?”

“Yes, he was there. Apparently he used to date Jaebum hyung, but I don't think they ended on good terms, because Youngjae was _really_ pissed that hyung was there,”

Jooheon laughs,

“Damn Kyunnie, at least wait until lunch to start reenacting the Boston Tea Party,”

Changkyun raises an eyebrow at his friend,

“Don't look at me like that,” Jooheon fakes offense, “You're the one who made me take a U.S history course when we were in college,”

“And you remember that?”

“Yeah, because you wouldn't shut up about Boston, ‘oh I know that street’, ‘I walked down that avenue’, and ‘hey I’ve been to the harbor’. I couldn't forget,”

“Did I really talk about Boston that much?” Changkyun smiles sheepishly,

“All of the time,” Jooheon deadpans,

“Stop Boston shaming me, ” Changkyun fake cries, walking ahead of Jooheon,

“Boston shaming?” Jooheon asks, speeding up to catch up with Changkyun. It proves to not be too difficult, given the younger’s shorter legs and thus shorter stride,

“You're shaming me because of my talking about Boston,”

“Relax you big baby,” Jooheon grins, “Come on, we have to do our rounds,” he walks ahead,

“Hey,” Changkyun whines,

“Hi there nurse Kang,” Jooheon smiles at the on duty nurse, turning up the charm in obvious hopes of getting a favour,

“Hey Jooheon. Did you two hear the big news?”

“No,” Jooheon frowns, “What's up?”

“Apparently our department is getting a new chief of surgery,”

“Really?” Changkyun asks, leaning against the desk,

“Yep. Professor Yoo, he’s meant to be this super famous, world renowned surgeon who’s really well traveled. He's been all over the place; China, Japan, Thailand, America, Germany, and the Netherlands to name a few. He's supposed to grace us mortals with his presence later today,” she rolls her eyes,

“Apparently he's suffering from _terrible_ Jetlag after flying in from Belgium or something,”

Changkyun frowns, his overactive imagination piecing together a dangerous story; Professor _Yoo_ , Jet Lagged after flying in from, not Belgium, but _Austria._ The flight would make for some serious Jetlag, and kihyun had mentioned trying to become a Professor to Changkyun three years ago…Changkyun shakes his head, there's no way it could be Kihyun. There had to be many other Professors named Yoo, it was a very common name, and it's not like Kihyun is the only person who likes to travel. It's more likely to be literally anyone else. The odds are virtually astronomical,

“Changkyun?” Jooheon waves a hard in front of Changkyun's face,

“What?”

“Why are you so spaced out today?”

“No idea what you're talking about,” Changkyun shrugs, putting his hands in his pockets and strolling off,

“Hey, where are you going?”

“You're the one who said we had rounds to do. But if you _want_ to get yelled at for being irresponsible, that's your choice,” Changkyun laughs as Jooheon runs to catch up with him.

 

* * *

 

 

 “Hyung, where are you going?” Kihyun rolls over, closing his eyes against the bright light,

“I wanted to make you a surprise breakfast,” Hakyeon smiles ruffling Kihyun’s hair, “to celebrate your first day of work. But you’ve woken up,”

“Don’t worry about that,” Kihyun extends his arms, making a grabbing motion, “Come back. You’re warm and I want to sleep some more,”

“But the food–“

“Hyung, come on. While I’m still in a good mood, please,” Kihyun pouts,

“You know,” Hakyeon sighs, giving in and crawling back under the covers, “Minhyuk is probably going to try the same thing later,”

“I doubt that,” Kihyun chuckles, wrapping his arms around Hakyeon, “I’ve banned him from my kitchen,”

“ _Your_ kitchen,”

“Yes, it’s mine. I like to claim things when I want them to belong exclusively to me,”

“Oh really? Like what?”

“The kitchen is one. The car that I gave you for your birthday is mine.”

“Anything else,”

“You. Minhyuk. You’re both mine,” He mumbles, burying his face into the pillow,

“How sweet,”

Kihyun sits up,

“Good morning Minhyuk,” he scowls,

“It was. Are you hungry?”

Kihyun shrugs,

“Well, you won’t let me into the kitchen and you seem to have snatched Hakyeon for morning cuddles, so you can sort that out. Unless you _want_ to risk me burning down our house,”

“Keep your destructive hands away from my kitchen” Kihyun grumbles, pushing Hakyeon away, “I’ll make breakfast,” he fixes Minhyuk with the weakest death glare he’s ever given—knowing that his same-age friend was just teasing him—as he shoulders past him violently,

“Must you antagonise him so early in the morning?” Hakyeon sighs, “You stole my morning cuddles. He was in a good mood and everything, you suck,”

“It’s not my fault that Kihyun doesn't want to fuck you anymore,” Minhyuk laughs, sticking out his tongue,

“Shut up,” Hakyeon halfheartedly throws a pillow at him,

“Come on, let's go get food,”

“Hey Minhyuk,”

“What?”

“Happy birthday,”

Minhyuk smiles,

“Thanks hyung,”

 

“If you're going to keep being like this,” Minhyuk sighs, “I will honestly learn to cook,”

“Well then you can work on that. But until then,”  Kihyun smirks, sliding a fourth plate of French toast onto the table, “You can eat what I give you,”

Minhyuk opens his mouth to start whining again, but Hakyeon cuts him off,

“For as much as we _both,”_ He glares at Minhyuk, “appreciate your cooking,”

“Thank you Hakyeon,” Kihyun smiles,

“I think we can all agree,” he continues, “that you probably should stop with the food, or else we might just burst,” he eyes the four plates of French toast between the three of them, plus all of the other breakfast foods and assorted fruits,

“I guess I _did_ go a overboard just a smidge,”

“Only a little bit. You should have some actually, you're a really good cook,”

“I know,” Kihyun says, snatching a slice,

“You know, Ki, Wonnie’s back in Seoul,” Minhyuk practically whispers it, and Kihyun very nearly doesn't hear him,

“What?”

“I take it you didn't know then,”

“Why would I know that? Why do _you_ know that?”

“He…he told me,”

“Would you care to elaborate?”

“It's not like I wanted to talk to him, don't look at me like that,” Minhyuk frowns, “But, you know, I haven't changed my phone number in a while and Hyungwon doesn't have amnesia, believe it or not, so he called me,”

“Well, why is he back? I thought he moved back to Gwangju, I _thought_ I would never see him again. Minhyuk—“

“Can you calm down,” Minhyuk rolls his eyes, “It’s not like you’re going to run into him at the grocery store, Okay? He got a job here, that’s all. Besides, Seoul is the most populated city in Korea, the odds of you running into him are pretty much astronomical,”

“Well, astronomical odds tend to have a way of screwing me over, remember?” Kihyun scowls, throwing down and smashing a plate on his way past,

“You should hurry up,” Minhyuk says, “or else you’ll be late on your first day,”

“Shut up,”

 

* * *

 

“What’s ruffled your feathers?” Jooheon asks, smiling as Changkyun sifts agitatedly through the papers on his desk,

“The cardiology department,” Changkyun replies shortly,

“What about our department?”

“They have _opposed_ the surgery I’ve been looking forward to all week. The nerve,”

“You mean the *cabbage*?”

“Yes, the cabbage. They don’t want the surgery because of the ‘risks’, which is bcomplete bullshit, they want to do an angioplasty instead,”

“That’s too bad. I know that you were looking forward to this surgery,”

“You say that like I’m about to go down without a fight,” Changkyun scoffs, “I’m calling a surgical conference,”

“You are so stubborn at times,” Jooheon sighs, rolling his eyes and standing up, “I assume you’ll want me to be there,”

“Of course,” Changkyun smiles sweetly, “You’re my moral support,”

  


“Are you out of your mind?” Changkyun flashes the laser pointer aggressively at the screen, “It's not a suggestion, and it's not a theory. I’m _telling_ you that I can do this surgery, so I don't know why you're so against it,”

“Because it's too risky, Changkyun-ah,” Doctor Kang Soyou, radiology, sighs, “The risk of stroke, not to mention cardiac arrest during surgery, is lower with the angioplasty,”

“Do you _really_ think that an angioplasty is _possible_ in this circumstance _?_ Because if so, I suppose you left your years of medical school in the same place as your common sense today, Kang Soyou-ssi,”

“Yah, Im Changkyun,” Doctor Kim Seokjin, from neurology, scolds, “It's one thing if you're agitated, we understand that, but at the very least show some basic respect,”

“Okay fine, firstly I apologize,” Changkyun apologizes begrudgingly, “but secondly, what exactly makes you think that an angioplasty is safer than my surgery?” He brings out the laser pointer again, hearing the door open and close, not bothering to look up, “Look at this heart, look at the left main coronary artery. It is very clearly narrowed substantially, how do you not see that?” He grows more and more aggravated,  throwing down the pointer,

“The narrowing of the artery is negligible,” Soyou's sighs, “We wouldn't need to operate on it anyway,”

“Negligible, as if,” comes muttered from the corner of the room. They all turn to look at the owner of the comment, “So I suppose that if and when this patient dies, either during or after surgery, you’ll be the one to tell her family that their precious little girl died because there was an error clearly brought to your attention which you ignored because it was ‘negligible’?” Kihyun raises an eyebrow, “Or we could just do the surgery that any _real_ doctor would recommend in this case. Unless, of course, you can't see the obvious problem because you're not a real doctor. What do they call a fake doctor again? _Quack_ , I think. Look again, look properly with every last inch of your eyeballs. Do you still think that the narrowing is negligible, _Quack_?”

“Excuse me,” Soyou turns a very bright shade of red, “I don't know who you _think_ you are or what gives you any sort of right to talk to me like that, but–”

“I’m sorry, Doctor Kang,” Board Director Yoo Jeongyeon stands up, “I meant to introduce him to you all later, but seeing as how he doesn't know how to keep quiet,” she glares at him, “I might as well just do it now. Everyone, this is Yoo Kihyun, the new chief surgeon of the cardiology department,”

 

Changkyun feels his heart drop to his stomach like a rock.

 

“What the hell are you doing here?” Changkyun grabs Kihyun's wrist harshly as they exit,

“Didn't you hear? I’m the new chief surgeon,”

“No, I mean _here._ This hospital. Why?”

“Are you really not even going to thank me? I helped get you back your prized surgery after all,”

“Thank you. Now, what are you doing here?”

“I have no idea what you're talking about,” Kihyun smiles innocently,

“I _really_ doubt that. In fact, I get the feeling that you're here because of _me,”_

Kihyun chuckles,

“While I must admit that you would be correct in most circumstances, this is a special circumstance. Even though I was more willing to take the position at this particular hospital because of you, you aren't the reason I’m here,”

“Well, if it's not me, then why are you…?” Changkyun trails off, noticing Kihyun's eyes drifting, “What?”

“Nothing,” Kihyun mumbles, eyes following a suspiciously familiar head of blonde hair, “Do you know if any doctors here are blonde?”

“None that I know of. Why?”

“No reason,” Kihyun says, distractedly prying Changkyun's hands off of his wrist, “For as scintillating as this conversation is, we’ll have to continue it another time,”

“What are you–?” Changkyun doesn't finish his question, Kihyun already having walked away.

 

Kihyun practically has to run to catch up with him. It's not surprising though, he's always had longer strides than Kihyun (in the event that Kihyun is right about whom he's currently following). Kihyun actually used to love that about him, now it's a source of irritation for Kihyun, just like everything he used to love about him. He reaches out almost desperately for his free hand, the one not holding the coffee cup, and pulls the man back to face him.

 

Hyungwon turns with a look of surprise on his face—almost dropping his coffee in the process—first because of the sudden pull, then when he sees who’s responsible for it,

“Kihyun?”

“Astronomical odds, huh?” Kihyun scoffs. Maybe he should go to Vegas if he's going to keep defying the odds like this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Cabbage: nickname for the medical procedure CABG—coronary artery bypass grafting


	7. Rewind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2 year flashback…  
> Changkyun just wanted to give Youngjae a nice thirtieth birthday. Of course, that becomes lower priority when he begins to suspect his boyfriend of trying to kill someone.

“ _ **I don’t think**_ wine is a very appropriate gift for someone's birthday, hyung,” Changkyun smiles, looking at the bottle of Prosecco in Kihyun’s hands,

“I think Youngjae will forgive me. It was all I could find on such short notice,”

“I highly doubt that,” Changkyun says, rolling his eyes and ringing the doorbell,

“Oh right. Hyung,”

“Yeah?”

“I forgot to tell you something. About some of the people who’ll be here tonight,”

“What about them?”

“Well, the thing is, Jae—“

“Kihyun-ah?”

“Jaebummie?” Kihyun turns and, lo and behold, Im Jaebum is standing in the doorway, “I take it that this is what you wanted to tell me?” He arches an eyebrow,

“Yeah,” Changkyun says sheepishly, “I know it’s kind of awkward, seeing as how the two of you seem to not like each other and all, but please try and get along, Okay? It’s Youngjae’s birthday and I want it to be special. You only turn thirty once,”

Kihyun sighs,

“Baby, you do realise that you only turn every age once, right?”

“That’s besides the point, hyung,” Changkyun rolls his eyes, “I’m serious you two; be civil,”

“That’s harder for some of us than others,” Jaebum mutters, stepping inside,

“What was he talking about?” Changkyun frowns,

“Don’t worry about it,” He pulls on a smile when he sees Youngjae, “Happy Birthday!” He beams, hugging him, “Changkyunnie expects me to be civil tonight,” Kihyun whispers into Youngjae’s ear,

“That explains it,” he quips, pulling away from Kihyun, “What did you get me?”

“Well, I got you some wine,” he says, handing the bottle of Prosecco over to a frowning Youngjae,

“That’s it? You’re the worst guest ever,”

“ _And,”_ Kihyun adds hastily, “I got you a…” he starts to trail off, digging through his jacket pockets, “half a bag of skittles,” he digs some more, “a handful of mints,” a little more digging—good Lord, when did he last empty his pockets? Youngjae’s frown deepens and Changkyun sighs, “and a…” he pulls out his car keys to make room for his hand,

“You bought me a car?” Youngjae’s eyes light up. Shit,

“Umm…” Kihyun looks at Changkyun pleadingly. Minhyuk will kill him if he gives away his favourite car, and Changkyun will kill him if he says no. Changkyun shrugs with a smirk, clearly not planning on helping Kihyun out of this mess, “Yeah!” He smiles tightly. Minhyuk will get over it, maybe, “I got you a car,” he hands over the keys (extremely hesitantly and begrudgingly), “It’s outside,” he is _so_ dead,

“Wow hyung, this is so nice of you. I'm honestly a bit surprised,”

“You know me,” Kihyun grimaces, “Always giving,” eager to change the subject from the 200 million won car (that he does not own) he just gave away, Kihyun asks, “Where's your kitchen? We should chill the Prosecco before we drink it,”

“If you say so,” Youngjae shrugs, “You're the wine expert after all. It's in there,” he gestures with his thumb to a door, “And I’m sure you know what a fridge looks like,”

“I do,” Kihyun says awkwardly. Cradling the wine like it's a newborn, he makes his way to the kitchen. The fridge isn't particularly hard to find—the thing is huge—it’s what, or more accurately who, else he finds in the kitchen that surprises him.

Throwing a handful of raisins at Jung Hoseok, Min Yoongi laughs with his signature gummy smile,

“You shouldn’t waste food, you know,” Kihyun raises an eyebrow. Upon hearing Kihyun’s voice Yoongi’s smile drops right off of his face—his gums going back into hiding—and he scowls,

“What are _you_ doing here?”

“Whatever do you mean, Yoongi dear?” Kihyun bats his eyelashes innocently, even as Yoongi clearly bristles at his use of the term ‘dear’,

“I mean,” Yoongi huffs, “You and Youngjae _aren't_ friends, and no one else here in their right mind even likes you,”

“That's not true,” Kihyun pouts indignantly, “you're so quick to assume things,” he sighs, “see, this is one of the reasons I broke up with you,”

Yoongi sucks in a sharp breath,

“ _I_ broke up with _you,_ Kihyun,”

“If you _want_ to think of it like that, go ahead,”

“I don't know how I put up with you for so long,”

“Four years is quite a long time, Yoongi,” Kihyun smiles almost fondly, “I almost fell for you, you know,” Yoongi stands up abruptly, “Can you relax? I said _almost_. I guess you still have the same temperament as before,” Kihyun smirks, closing the fridge—the wine safely tucked inside—as Yoongi hastily pours a glass of Rosé, “I’ll see you around then,”

He swings the door open,

“The bubbly is safe and sound in the fridge,” he announces to the current inhabitants of Youngjae’s sitting room—Jaebum, Yugyeom, Jinyoung, Changkyun, Jooheon, Jeon Jungkook, Kim Taehyung and, of course, the birthday boy himself, Youngjae—

“Awesome. Changkyun? Would you be a dear and try to pry the Rosé away from Yoongi hyung?”

“Why didn't you just ask me to do it? I was in the kitchen anyway,” Khihyun frowns as Changkyun stands up,

“I forgot,” Youngjae shrugs, “Oh. Never mind. I can just ask him myself,”

Kihyun turns around, Changkyun stopped by his side, to face an angry Min Yoongi holding a glass of red wine,

“Hey there Yoongi hyung. Where's the–” his question gets cut off by Changkyun pulling Kihyun behind him as Yoongi hurls the contents of the wine at him. The impact causes him to turn his head slightly as the room fills with gasps,

“Are you out of your mind?” Kihyun glares at Yoongi, “What is wrong with you?”

“Hyung don't!” Hoseok comes running out of the kitchen behind Yoongi, stopping in his tracks when he realizes that he's too late,

“Yah Jung Hoseok,” Kihyun turns his glare onto him, “Do something about your boyfriend, _please_ ,” He sighs, turning back to Changkyun, “Oh, you're a mess,” he inspects him closer, “This is definitely going to stain _my_ shirt—you're even wearing white—and you're makeup is ruined,” he frowns, dragging a finger softly down Changkyun face. It comes back black (from the streaking mascara), red (the wine) and covered in foundation, “this won't do,” Kihyun clicks his tongue, shaking his head, “Hey Youngjae, you and Changkyun are pretty much a match, right? For foundation?”

“Yeah,” Youngjae frowns, “Why?”

“Let's get you cleaned up,” Kihyun smiles, taking  Changkyun's hand and leading him up the stairs.

 

* * *

 

“Hyung really, you didn't have to completely re-do my makeup. It's fine really,” Changkyun sighs,

“No talking, and stop moving or I’ll mess up,” Kihyun scolds, “There, done,” he leans back to admire his work, “Damn, I am _good_ at this,” He smiles, holding a mirror in front of Changkyun,

“Wow,” he whispers, admiring his reflection, “I look…”

“Hot,” Kihyun finishes for him, lowering the mirror. He's suddenly a lot closer than Changkyun originally remembers, cupping his cheek, “ _very_ ,” he giggles,

“You should be a makeup artist,” Changkyun laughs, leaning closer and pecking Kihyun on the lips,

“No thank you,” he mutters against Changkyun’s lips, “I want to be a professor. I told you that, didn't I?”

“Yeah, I suppose you did,”

“Sorry to interrupt,” Hoseok leans against the doorframe, smiling, “Changkyun-ssi, do you mind if I steal Kihyun for a moment?”

“Not at all hyung,” Changkyun returns his smile, “I’ll be downstairs if you need me,”

“You seem to like him,” Hoseok comments, closing the door behind him,

“And if I do?” Kihyun sits up,

“Nothing, just making an observation,”

“What do you want, Hoseok?”

“Why must you rile him up like that?”

“Who?” Kihyun asks, batting his eyelashes innocently,

“You know who I mean; Yoongi hyung,”

“Believe it or not, Hoseok, I honestly had no idea that he would be here. I don’t actually care,”

“You may not care, but I know he does. In case you’ve forgotten, may I remind you that you tried to _kill_ him? I’m sure you probably forgot about that because you’re totally emotionally numb, but hyung isn’t, Kihyun. He still has the scars, mental and physical alike. And we both know they aren’t going away any time soon,”

“You say this like you think I care,”

“Damn it Kihyun, for once in your life will you just listen?” Hoseok snaps,

“I’m waiting for you to get to the point,” Kihyun sits back, raising an eyebrow,

“All I’m asking is that you stay as far away from Yoongi hyung as you can. Please,”

“Hoseok, I honestly could not care any less than I do right now if I actively tried to. Quite frankly, Yoongi just doesn't interest me anymore. I have new, more interesting, people,”

“Like Changkyun?”Hoseok asks. Kihyun shrugs,

“He is quite interesting, but I’m sure I’ll get bored of him eventually,”

“I don't think so,” hoseok shakes his head, “I think he's special. You two have been together about a year, right?”

“More or less, why?”

“Do you remember how you got with Yoongi hyung a year in?”

Kihyun frowns, thinking back,

 

“ _Yoongi, shut up!” Kihyun screams, shoving him away and into a wall, “just shut up already!”_

_“Tell me I’m wrong Kihyun. Do it,” Yoongi retaliates, “You can't because you know I’m right,”_

_“Stop it,” Kihyun snaps, throwing a glass across the room. It smashes against the far wall,_

_“Make me,” Yoongi smirks, “Come over here and fucking make me,”_

_Kihyun storms over, grabbing him by the collar,_

_“You asked for this, you little brat,” Kihyun snarls._

 

“And he stayed with me for three more years,” Kihyun grins at Hoseok, “He really was thick in the head,”

“Or maybe he really loved you,” Hoseok replies,

“Maybe,” Kihyun shrugs,

“You know Kihyun,” Hoseok says, hand on the door, “If you ask me–”

“It's a good thing I’m not asking you then,”

“Don't interrupt,” he scolds, “As I was saying, if you ask me I’d say you might be falling in love with him,”

“I don't do ‘love’, Hoseok, in case you've forgotten,”

“Maybe not right now, but I can tell. He's changing you. It could be a good thing if you let it,”

“You don't know what you’re talking about,”

“Maybe I don't. But then again, maybe I do,” Hoseok smiles, closing the door softly behind him and leaving Kihyun to his thoughts.

 

* * *

 

 

“Are you okay,” Yoongi asks sheepishly,

“Well, one of Kihyun's favorite shirts is ruined, I smell like—what is this, Cabernet?

“Merlot,”

“I smell like Merlot and I just wanted to give Youngjae a nice thirtieth birthday which is now ruined. So no, I’m not great,”

“I’m sorry. But I have to ask, why?”

“Why what?”

“Why would you do that? Why are you willing to get a glass of Merlot to the face for _Kihyun_ , of all people. Most people who know him would gladly have let me do it, some would want to do it themselves,”

“Why?” Changkyun frowns, “I know Jaebum hyung doesn’t seem to like Kihyun, for some reason that neither will tell me, but he’s so sweet, why would anyone hate him?”

Yoongi scoffs,

“You really don’t know him, do you?”

“I know hyung,” Changkyun protests, “I know him better than anyone else,”

“No you don’t,” Yoongi laughs, “You don’t know him at all. If you did you wouldn’t be so quick to defend him,”

“So do you?”

“What?”

“Do you know Kihyun?”

“Unfortunately, yes. I know him very well,”

“I don’t believe that. If _you_ really knew him, you wouldn’t hate him. He’s amazing,”

“Changkyun-ssi, I guess beyond everything else I’m sure he’s doing to you, it appears he’s also keeping secrets from you,”

“What are you talking about?”

“We dated. For _four years_ ,”

“So?” Changkyun scoffs, “We don’t talk about our exes unless it’s relevant,”

“So then I guess he also didn’t tell you that he was psychologically and physically abusive for most of our relationship,”

Changkyun’s eyes very nearly pop out of his sockets,

“You’re lying” he shakes his head so hard that it hurts, “He would never. He’s the sweetest person you’ll ever meet,”

“He’s deceiving you, Changkyun. He tried to _kill_ me,”

“No way. No, I don’t believe you,”

“Will you believe me if I show you this?” Yoongi pulls his t-shirt off, exposing his torso, and Changkyun’s jaw drops.

Covering his entire upper right half is darkened—almost black—skin and severe burn scars,

“What happened to you?” Changkyun asks, almost too shocked to form words,

“Kihyun happened,” Yoongi answers simply.

 

* * *

 

 

_“Kihyun, baby, please drive slower. You're scaring me,”_

_“Yoongi darling, be quiet,” Kihyun responds, pressing harder on the accelerator,_

_“At least turn on the windshield wipers. How can you see through all this rain?”_

_Can you call Minhyuk for me?” He asks, ignoring Yoongi’s request and handing over his phone,_

_“Sure,” he dials Minhyuk and puts the phone on speaker. Minhyuk answers on the second ring,_

_“Yoo Kihyun I swear to God I’m actually going to fucking kill you!”_

_“Hi to you too Minhyukkie,”_

_“Don't you Minhyukkie me. Where the fuck are you?”_

_“I’m sad Minhyukkie,” Kihyun pouts,_

_“What? Why?”_

_“Yoongi wants to break up. He doesn't like me anymore so I’m sad,”_

_“Bloody hell– Kihyun I am_ not _playing right now. Where the hell are you?”_

_“I’m on a drive with Yoongi,”_

_“Motherfu—no, you are not,” Kihyun can hear his friend go pale, “No, no. You aren't,”_

_“If I’m not with Yoongi then where am I?”_

_“You're…you’re…goddamn it where are you?” Eventually he says “You're at home with me. We…we’re playing video games—you like video games, right?”_

_“I like Mario Kart, I think we have a copy of that,”_

_“We do,” Minhyuk agrees, “I think so, I’ll check, but if we have it that’ll work,” There's a few seconds of quiet rustling before Minhyuk says, “We do, in my room. Okay. We’re at home playing Mario Kart—do you want pizza?”_

_“Pizza sounds good,”_

_“Margarita?”_

_“I like that,”_

_“Can I have some pizza?” Yoongi chimes in,_

_“No,” the two say in unison,_

_“Why not?” He frowns,_

_“Dead people don't eat pizza,” Kihyun responds coolly,_

_“What?” Yoongi’s eyes very nearly pop out of his head, “Who’s dead?”_

_“So, video games and pizza?” Minhyuk clarifies,_

_“Yeah,”_

_“Okay, I’ll order it now. Don't do anything stupid, Kihyun, understand?”_

_“I’m in prime stupid decision making, Minhyuk, you know that,”_

_“Kihyun, I swear to—”_

_“Come meet us,” Kihyun cuts him off,_

_“What?”_

_“You should come meet us. I want to have a race,”_

_“You're out of your goddamn mind, Yoo Kihyun,” Minhyuk sighs, “Okay, park that fucking car right now and_ do not _move until I get there,”_

_“Will you race us?” Kihyun asks,_

_“If you stop the car now and don’t move until I get there, then yes, I’ll race you,”_

_“Yay,” Kihyun smiles, pulling over, “okay, we’ve stopped,”_

_“Great,” Minhyuk sighs, “Once the pizza gets here, I’ll come meet you,”_

_“But you don't know where we are,”_

_“I have a GPS tracker installed on your phone because I can't fucking trust you when you randomly stop taking your damn naltrex,”_

_“You're wha—”_

_“Be quiet Yoongi,” Kihyun cuts him off,_

_“Kihyun, I’m going to hang up now,”_

_“Okay,”_

_“I’m hanging up and I swear to fucking_ Satan, _if you move that car, I’m going to need two alibis,”_

_“Whatever you say,”_

_“I’m serious Kihyun,”_

_“Sure,”_

_“Bye, Ki,”_

_“Why would either of you need an alibi?” Yoongi asks,_

_“No reason,” Kihyun says nonchalantly,_

_“But—”_

_“Yoongi, babe, please stop talking,”_

_“Just tell me what's going on!” Yoongi snaps,_

_“What you did was very hurtful to me,” Kihyun pouts,_

_“What did I…oh. Wait a second, you're sad because I want to break up with you? Are you kidding me right now?”_

_“No. I'm very serious. That wasn't very nice of you,”_

_“Kihyun, you are extremely_ abusive, _why would I want to be with you?”_

_“You haven't had a problem with it for three years,”_

_“Because I’m an idiot and I loved you,”_

_“Do you not love me now?”_

_“No, I don't. And, quite frankly, I’m not sure why I ever did,”_

_“You're so mean to me,” Kihyun says, restarting the car,_

_“But Minhyuk isn't here yet,” Yoongi protests as Kihyun slowly starts to speed up,_

_“We’ll see him in a second. Call him,”_

_“Why are you calling me again I’m almost there,” Minhyuk grumbles when he answers,_

_“Great, we’ll see you soon then,”_

_“What are you talking about?”_

_Kihyun counts down in his head;_ three, two—

_A white car, Minhyuk’s car, emerges from the rain, in a direct collision course for Yoongi and Kihyun,_

_“I hate you,” Minhyuk says._

_Kihyun turns the wheel sharply to the left, just barely swerving out of the way, and the car spins and slams into the barrier on the right hand side; Yoongi’s side._

 

* * *

 

 

“Kihyun did _that_ to you?” Changkyun asks,

“Do you believe me now?”

“I don't…he wouldn't,”

“Ask him yourself later. I wonder how long he’ll deny it before telling the truth,”

“No, I’m telling you, Kihyun wouldn't do something like that,”

The door swings open and Hoseok, followed by Kihyun, enters,

“Hyung, what’s going on,” Hoseok frowns

“That's what I’d like to know,” Changkyun says, looking at Kihyun,

“How would I know?” Kihyun says, feigning innocence,

“You really are the best liar,” Yoongi quips,

“Stop it,” Kihyun snaps, “How is it that you can hold a grudge for five years?”

“It's hard to forget a night that's _literally_ burned into my skin,”

“Kihyun-ah, this hyung says you did that to him. He's lying right?”

“Changkyunnie—”

“ _Don't._ I need you to look me in the eyes and tell me you didn't do it. That you wouldn't _ever_ ,”

Kihyun sighs,

“Can we not do this here? Let's talk about this at home, okay?”

“Fine. Let's go home,”

“Babe—”

“ _Now_ , Kihyun. We’re going home,”

“Fine,” Kihyun gives in, “Let's go,”

“Bye Ki,” Yoongi waves sarcastically. Kihyun doesn't respond, only glares at him as he grabs Changkyun’s hand and leads him outside,

“We’ll have to call Minhyuk though. He’ll kill me when he finds outs I gave away his favorite car,” Kihyun chuckles. Changkyun does not, “Come on babe, lighten up,”

“Hyung, I don't think you realize that this is actually very serious,”

“Of course I realize. Just because I’m not pouting like you,” he pokes Changkyun’s cheek, “Doesn't mean I don't think this is serious. Okay?”

“You didn't do it, right?”

“We can talk about this when we get home,”

“Hyung,”

“Changkyun,”

“ _Hyung,”_

“ _I said_ when we get home,”

“Hyung look at me,”

Kihyun turns his head to the left. Away from Changkyun,

“Baby, _look at me,”_ Changkyun grabs his wrist,

“I don't know what you're expecting,”

“I’m expecting you to say that you didn't do it,”

“Expectations lead to disappointment, Changkyunnie,”

“ _What?_ Is this your way of telling me that you did?”

“Don't be ridiculous,”

“So just tell me you didn't do it. Why can't you just say that?”

“You sound like you think I would actually do something like that,” Kihyun comments as Minhyuk pulls up,

“What am I supposed to think when you won't answer me?”

“Let's talk about this later,”

“But—”

“ _Later,”_ Kihyun snaps. So Changkyun drops the subject.

He spends the whole journey in silence. Even when Minhyuk asks him and Kihyun about the party, even when Kihyun asks for his help when Minhyuk starts yelling at him for giving away his car, even when they’re in the house and Kihyun asks if he's thirsty. He finally breaks his silence to ask Kihyun one question,

“Will you tell me the truth now?”


	8. The Fundamentals of Forgetting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun thought he was done with Hyungwon and Jooheon suspects that Kihyun didn’t actually come back for Changkyun

_**“Kihyun?”** _

“Astronomical odds, huh?” Kihyun scoffs, “I thought I would never see you again,”

“That makes two of us, Kiki,”

Kihyun takes a sharp breath and tightens his hold,

“ _Don’t_ call me that,” he hisses,

“Why not?” Hyungwon pouts, “You used to love that nickname,”

“I also used to regularly feel emotions, but _somebody_ took that away from me, Hyungwon,”

“You say that like it was my fault,”

“That because it _is._ But you still seem to feel no sense of responsibility, just like when we were in high school,”

“Can you get over that already?” Hyungwon sighs, rolling his eyes,

“ _Get over it?”_ Kihyun's blood boils, “Hyungwon I—” he has to cut himself off and take a deep breath, lest he start yelling at Hyungwon in the middle of the corridor, “Do you hear how heartless you sound? Or do you just not care?”

“I honestly don't care, Kihyun-ah. So enlighten me. Just how heartless do I sound?”

“Hyungwon, I _loved_ you. I gave you everything I had—like the fool I was—but that _clearly_ wasn't enough for you, because you gave it away. To _him._ Just my luck that virtually _everyone_ I know is suddenly around me. I should consider going to Vegas if I keep defying the odds like this,” he laughs humorlessly

“Only if you take me with you,” Hyungwon jokes. Kihyun scowls,

“You always did have a bad habit of showing up where you _aren't_ wanted,”

“Woah, I’m getting such deja vu right now. Where's Hoseok hyung when you need him?”

Kihyun sighs,

“Hyungwon, I am going to be super clear right now; you and I? We do not know each other. Understand? As far as you're concerned, I’m just some random guy you vaguely remember from high school. And as far as _I'm_ concerned, we’ve never met. We weren't friends, we didn't talk and we sure as hell _never_ dated. Do I make myself clear?”

“Like crystal, Kihyun-ah,”

“Excellent,” he starts to walk away before turning back, having remembered something, “And it's _Professor Yoo_ to you, okay?”

“Got it. Professor Yoo,”

He makes sure to give Hyungwon one last dirty look before finally leaving,”

“This should be fun,” Hyungwon mutters to no one in particular, taking a long sip of his coffee and smirking.

 

* * *

 

“Will you stop pacing?” Jooheon sighs, “You’ll wear a groove into the floor,”

“This isn't funny, hyung,” Changkyun groans,

“You're right, it's not funny—it's _hilarious_ ,”

“Hyung I’m serious,”

“So am I,” Jooheon chuckles, “and here I thought I needed to watch American daytime TV to see such scandal. I never would have thought the my life would _become_ an episode of Dr. Phil,”

“So this is where all that extra money we spend on international channels goes?” Changkyun asks, raising an eyebrow,

“Absolutely,”

“You are no help,” Changkyun whines, throwing a cushion at Jooheon,

“I don't know what you want from me,”

“Anything but this,”

“Your sociopathic ex just so happens to be working in the same hospital as you, big deal. I know you may find this hard to believe, but I don't think everything in his life revolves around you,”Jooheon shrugs,

“I wouldn't be so sure about that hyung,”

“Honestly Changkyun,” Jooheon rolls his eyes, “I usually agree with you on most things concerning Kihyun hyung, but I think you're wrong on this one. You're forgetting that this is one of the best hospitals in Seoul, if not, all of Korea. That alone seems like a good enough insensitive to work here. And he could have another reason to be here,”

“I seriously doubt that hyung,” Changkyun says,

“Hey,” Jooheon shrugs, “you never know what's going on in someone's head,”

 

“Hello,” Kihyun smiles sweetly at the nurses behind the desk, “I’m the new chief surgeon, Professor Yoo,”

“Yes, we know. I'm Kim Dasom. This is Kim Seolhyun and Cho—”

“Tzuyu,” Kihyun cuts her off, “I know Tzuyu,” he says with a smile,

“Great, so you know our names. Feel free to ask us if you need anything,”

Kihyun hums uninterestedly,

“Your last names are enough. I don't think we really need to be on a first name basis, do we?”

Tzuyu’s smile drops,

“I guess not, but it's nice to get to know the people you work with,”

“If you say so,” Kihyun sighs, “Can I have the patient files for Yoon Dowoon and Yoo Taeyang?”

“Why do you want those?” Seolhyun frowns, looking through the drawers,

“Those files are…important to me,”

“That's fair enough, but—”

“I don't really think this requires a game of twenty questions, now does it?” He smiles hollowly, snatching the files from her, “I’ll see you around, Tzuyu,” he throws her a rakish grin, skimming through the files as he walks away,

“He's awfully brazen, isn't he?” Dasom comments with a frown,

“Yeah, but it's kind of cool,” Seolhyun says,

“You're right,” Tzuyu agrees, “Like, bad boy style?”

“Exactly,” The two squeal excitedly,

“Stop that,” Dasom scolds,

“Sorry,” they hang their heads in unison,

“Besides,” Tzuyu sulks, “He doesn't like girls,”

“How would _you_ know?” Seolhyun glares at her,

“Kihyun oppa and I go _way_ back,” she says, smiling to herself.

 

* * *

 

“Why is it so dark in here? You’re not dead. Yet,” Kihyun grumbles, throwing open the curtains, “They’ll get an earful once you wake up,” he chuckles, hanging his coat on the door and sitting down, “It's been so long, hasn't it?”

The steady beeping of the machines all around him are the only answer,

“I miss you, Dowoon-ah,” he pouts, carding his fingers through Dowoon’s black locks, “If only we weren't such dumbasses, you might still be here,” Kihyun sighs, “I work here now, you know, so I’ll be able to visit you a lot more now. I’m sorry I disappeared for so long. In my haste to get away I forgot about you and Taeyang. Two years is a long time, I know, but I’m back know and I’m not going anywhere anymore. I’ll make up for all of our lost time, I promise. Gosh, I have so many stories from our trip, I want to tell you all of them.” Moving away to take a look at Dowoon’s chart Kihyun says, “I met Hakyeon again,”

Even though there's no answer, he swears the machine beeps judgmentally at him,

“I know you said that he was bad news, don't give me that,” Kihyun frowns, “But that was when we were in high school. I'm a grown up now and a three year age gap isn't even that big anymore. Honestly, we have so much to catch up on and I promise I’ll get around to it but I really want to see Taeyang before I get started on my day. I’ll be back soon okay?”

Taking one last look over his shoulder, he makes sure to close the door as softly as possible,

“What were you doing in there, hyung?” Kihyun turns sharply, very nearly running into Jooheon,

“Why do you ask?”

“It's your first day and you're already skulking around in the rooms. I'm suspicious,” Jooheon says, narrowing his eyes, which is a feat in itself considering how narrow they already are,

“Aw Joohoney, you wound me,” Kihyun pouts innocently, placing a hand over his heart,

“You know I’m not the only one who’s suspicious about your motives to work here,”

“While I understand your and Changkyun’s notion that everything in my life revolves around him,” Kihyun sighs, “And though that is true to a certain extent, I do have concerns besides Changkyun, believe it or not,”

“Concerns like whoever’s in there?” Jooheon raises an eyebrow nodding to the door,

“Yes and no. I have bigger concerns down the hall, so if you would excuse me,” he starts off down the hall, but Jooheon grabs him by the wrist,

“Who is it? Behind that door and down the hall. Who matters so much to you that you would come back? Because Changkyun might not see it, he’s too naïve, but _I_ can tell. You didn’t come back for him, as much as he and I want to believe, you came back for whoever is in this hospital.”

“You’re awful nosey today,”

Jooheon shrugs,

“You make me curious. So tell me Kihyun, if not Changkyun, who did you come back for?”

“What happened to you to make you so good at seeing through people?”

“Nothing,” Jooheon lies, “I’m just very observant,”

“Well then I hope you can _observe_ me walking away from you,” Kihyun says, pulling his arm free softer than Jooheon expected, walking with his hands in his pockets down the hallway

“I should keep an eye on him,” Jooheon frowns.

 

“What are those?” Changkyun frowns, craning his head to get a better look at the files in Kihyun's hands, “Who’s Yoo Tae—” Kihyun snaps the files shut,

“Shouldn't you be prepping for your surgery soon?” Kihyun comments, trying to keep the aggravation out of his voice, “I’d hate for all of our hard work to be for naught,”

“ _Our?”_ Changkyun scoffs, arching an eyebrow,

“It was _my_ amazing negotiating skills and superior medical knowledge that convinced the department to even let you do this surgery,”

“Well, that and no one really wanted to get called a quack in front of their colleagues,” Changkyun chuckles, remembering Kihyun’s less than stellar first interaction with the other doctors,

“I suppose that too,” he shrugs,

“So what’s in the files?”

“I never knew you and Jooheon were so curious,”

“Jooheon?” Changkyun frowns, “What about him?”

“He was asking me about the files earlier too,”

“Well, it _is_ mildly suspicious that you're looking through random patients files when you haven't even been here two hours,”

“They aren’t random. They’re special,”

“What’s special about them?”

“That’s…not important,”

“They must be pretty important if you couldn’t even wait one day to get them,”

“Why is it that you’re so interested in me? Especially considering that you explicitly told me not to interact with you anymore,”

“That's—”

“Kihyun, there you are,” Jeongyeon grabs his wrist, smiling apologetically at Changkyun, “Sorry Changkyun, do you mind if I steal him for a bit?”

“He’s all yours,” Changkyun shrugs,

 

“Can you tell me exactly _why_ you are looking through random files on your first day? It’s not even lunch yet, so can _please_ wait at least a day before you start to give me headaches?” Jeongyeon asks, crossing her arms over her chest,

“Gosh, my baby sister is so mean to me,” Kihyun pouts, feigning hurt, sitting back in Jeongyeon’s chair and crossing his legs on her desk,

“Will you lower your voice?” She snaps, “What if someone hears you? They might—”

“Might what?” Kihyun scoffs, “Find out we’re related and accuse you of nepotism?”

“That’s the least if my worries right now. That would also be marginally better than what you actually did,”

You know my specialties,”

“What do you even have on him to get him to give you this job, no questions?”

“Just trust me; when you have the history with Hoseok hyung that I do, getting favors from him becomes a piece of cake,”

“And just what kind of history do you have?”

“All in due time, little sister. All in due time,”

Jeongyeon eyes him suspiciously and Kihyun smirks.

 

* * *

 

 

 _“Hoseokkie?” Kihyun calls, pushing open the door gently. Hoseok gave him a key a few weeks ago, and he’s been letting himself in almost constantly since then, “Hoseokkie I’m bored, play with me,” he frowns. There's no reply, but Hoseok said he’d be home, “Hoseok?” He makes his way slowly but surely up the stairs. Hoseok promised him playtime and Kihyun was damn well getting it. He had to admit though, their little arrangement was a bit strange; screwing the guy his boyfriend cheated on him with in high school was definitely_ not _a point in his life Kihyun imagined he would ever reach, but then again, neither was being a sociopath, and yet here he is. Once upstairs, he begins to throw open random doors in hopes of finding Hoseok,_

_“Yah Lee Hoseok!” He calls, out of sheer frustration, raising the pitch of his voice to sound like Hoseok’s wife. Rather than a response though, he hears a quiet, muffled “shit”. Following the voice, he finally finds Hoseok in an…interesting predicament,_

_“This is peculiar, to say the least,” Kihyun comments, smiling as Hoseok struggles to work the zipper on his jeans with his ‘friend’ in a state of mild undress, slowly sliding his phone out of his pocket,_

_“It's not what it—oh Kihyun, it's you,” Hoseok sighs in relief, “I thought I was so screwed,”_

_“Nobody says you aren't yet. I'm just giving you a chance to explain yourself before I blackmail you with this. So go on, explain,”_

_“It's kind of a long story,”_

_“Well then,” Kihyun smirks, taking the photo, “I hope for your sake that you can talk faster than I can text, or you're going to have some problems,”_

_“Okay, so I was coming back from the grocery store—we were out of milk—and I bumped into Hyungwon,”_

_Said male raises his hand in a salute, making no effort to put on his clothes—it's not like Kihyun hasn't seen him in such a state many times before,_

_“So he said we should catch up, you know, reconnect,”_

_“Don't worry, I know the rest; one thing led to another and now you're reconnecting in a different way,” he laughs, “Don't worry, I’ll keep this a secret. We’d hate for your conservative wife to find out about your…hobbies,”_

_“Thank you so much Ki,”_

_“Don't thank me yet,” Kihyun says, eyeing Hyungwon, “You owe me for this. And_ you,” _he turns to Hyungwon, “You have a bad habit of showing up where you're not wanted. I hope you fix that, and soon,”_

_“Sure thing, Kihyunnie,”_

_“I’ll leave you two to finish up,”_

_“You aren't mad?” Hoseok asks, genuinely confused,_

_“I’ve no reason to be. It's not like I have feelings for you or anything. You're just fun to play with,” Kihyun laughs,_

_“I’ll see you around, Ki,” Hyungwon waves_

_“I hope to God not,” Kihyun replies. Once outside he sighs to himself,_

_“I guess I’m not getting any playtime anymore. I wonder if Hakyeon and Minhyuk are free,”_


	9. The Fundamentals of Family

**“Hey sis,” Kihyun**  calls, looking up from the file,

“What do you want?” Jeongyeon sighs,

“How's Tae been?”

She scoffs,

“As if you care,”

“What's _that_ supposed to mean?”

“ _It means_ you can't pretend that you care about Taeyang when you left him for two _fucking years,_ oppa. You _left,_ and now you think that just because you're back everything is okay? We're not all psychopaths like you, Kihyun,” he very clearly bristles at this, and Jeongyeon knows it, “Some of us actually have feelings,”

“That's not fair and you know it. Do you think I _wanted_ to leave Taeyang? To leave Dowoon?”

“But you did. You left them _both,_ Ki,”

“And I came back!” He snaps, standing up, “For _them_ , Jeongyeon. I know you forget this sometimes, but I actually _am_ capable of having feelings every once in a while,”

“So then what about _me?”_

“What?”

“You came back for Dowoon and Taeyang. You came back for _Changkyun,_ for goodness sake. Why didn't you come back for _me_ ? I’m your little sister, Ki. Do you know how it felt, calling you to tell you that I’m now a board director, only to find out you're nine _hundred_ kilometers away in Tokyo on a trip with Minhyuk? When you didn't come back for over two years? I _missed_ you Kihyun, I _needed_ you and you weren't there. You weren't there for me, and you weren't there Taeyang,”

“Jeongyeon I—”

“You know sucked the most about this whole thing?” She laughs humorlessly, “I was there for you for your _whole life,_ Kihyun, okay? I was there for everything; when you came out to our parents, when you got your heart broken by Hyungwon, even when you went through your weird phase of dating people way too old for you, I was the for all of it. And yet you couldn't be bothered to stay in the country for me,”

“Jeongyeon, I’m sorry. I didn't know,”

“You're not sorry. You're never sorry, so don’t expect to be able to just _sit there_ and pretend like everything is okay after going AWOL on our family for several years,”

“Jeongyeon, I don’t know how many times I’ll have to say that I’m sorry,”

”Until it sounds real,”

”I don’t—”

_“Paging director Yoo Jeongyeon. Director Yoo Jeongyeon to room 109 ward B”_

“You really want to know how Tae’s doing?” she sighs, arching an eyebrow,

“Yeah,”

“Follow me,”

 

“Taeyang-ssi, I would like you to follow the movement of my finger,” Changkyun smiles, clicking off the flashlight, “With your eyes, of course,” Waving his finger around slowly, Taeyang’s eyes follow it, though with a slight delay, “Excellent. We're almost done okay? Just a few more,” turning to Jeongyeon, ignoring Kihyun, he says, “I think he's mostly okay. There’ll probably be some minor neurological delays, and his speech may be mildly impaired, but nothing some speech and physical therapy won't fix. But, before all that, I would suggest contacting the family to let them know that he’s awake,”

“Kihyun can do that, can't you?” she smiles, turning to Kihyun,

“What?” Kihyun glares at her, “Why me?”

“It's good practice. Get yourself familiar with our systems,”

“Are you messing with me?”

“Kihyun, don't argue with your boss, okay?” She pats him on the shoulder, harder than strictly necessary, “Make the call,” she winks at him, not waiting for an answer before leaving,

“Why are you so averse to just making a phone call?” Changkyun asks, frowning, “It can't be that bad, can it?”

“How about you don't see your family for several years, then give them a sudden call and tell me how easy it is,”

“Sure hyung,” Changkyun replies absentmindedly, “Wait, what?”

But Kihyun’s already gone

 

* * *

 

“Hello? Is this the Yoo residence?” Kihyun sighs begrudgingly into the phone,

“ _Yes, who is this?”_ He recognizes the voice immediately; it’s Ri El, his younger sister. He hasn’t spoken to her in six years,

“I’m Professor Yoo, I’m calling about your brother,”

_“Taeyang? Oh God, what happened? Is he okay?”_

“Your brother is fine, Ri El. It’s not bad news, don’t worry,”

_“Oh thank—wait, how do you know my name?”_

“I’m sorry?”

_“Just now. You said my name,”_

“Miss, I think you’re mistaken. I never—” _‘Your brother is fine, Ri El,’_

Shit.

 _“What did you say your name was?”_ She asks. He can’t very well tell her. He’ll be done for if he does,

“Yoo. Professor Yoo,”

_“What’s your first name?”_

“I don’t…I don’t see how that is relevant right—”

“Hello Ma’am, this is Nurse Cho Tzuyu,” Tzuyu smiles, snatching the phone from Kihyun and effectively saving him from the situation, “How may I help you?”

“Thanks Tzuyu,” Kihyun whispers,

“Pardon? Oh, I’m sorry, Professor Yoo is busy at the moment…” she shoos him away violently, “…but I would be happy to leave  a message for hi—your brother?” She raises an eyebrow at Kihyun, who just shrugs, “Well, I’m afraid I can’t help you with that, but,” a mischievous grin forms on her face, “if you would like to visit the hospital,” Kihyun’s eyes practically pop out of his skull, “I’m sure Professor Yoo would _love_ to tell you in person. Yes, yes, take care now. Yes, goodbye,”

“Do you _want_ to die or…?” Kihyun scowls at her,

“No thanks. I'm having a good life right now, actually,”

“Then why the hell would do you that? I don’t _want_ to see my family, Tzuyu,”

“Come on, it’ll be good for you. You can see your family for the first time since, like, high school,”

“If I wanted to see my family,” Kihyun retorts, “I wouldn't have run away,”

“Aw, don't be like that, Ki. It’ll be nice to see them after all this time,”

“Tzuyu, I don't think—” his phone cuts him off, ringing, “This isn't over, Cho,” he warns, wagging a finger, “Hello?” He sighs,

“Where are you?” Minhyuk asks,

“Why?”

“You owe me a birthday lunch,”

“Bye,”

“But—“

Kihyun cuts the call before Minhyuk can say anything more. But he does answer when Minhyuk calls back (for the second time),

“You’re so mean to me,” Kihyun can hear the pout in his voice,

“I buy you lunch every year, can’t you leave me, and my bank account, alone for one day?”

“No way. It’s our tradition Kiki. You absolutely _cannot_ skip out on my birthday lunch,”

“Will you pay for it?”

“What? No. It’s my birthday, obviously you’re paying,”

Kihyun rolls his eyes, spotting Minhyuk at the main entrance,

“I don’t even know why I put up with you,”

“Me neither,”

he smiles, sneaking up behind Minhyuk and blowing on his neck gently. Minhyuk jumps away with a small squeak, hand on his chest,

“That scared me,” he whines, glaring at Kihyun (who is currently doubled over in laughter), “See, this is what I’m talking about, so mean,”

“I’m sorry, but I had to, it was just too funny,”

“You’re a dick,”

Kihyun sobers up quickly,

“Fine, buy your own birthday lunch then,” he says, managing to keep a straight face for approximately 0.1 seconds before breaking into smile and throwing an arm over Minhyuk’s shoulder, “Where should we go?”

“How about we go for steak?” He suggests,

“Minhyuk, it’s just barely noon,” Kihyun reminds him, “we can’t have steak for lunch,”

“Then we can go to a nice cafe, skip lunch, and you can buy me a steak dinner for my birthday,”

“One of these days, I’m going to go bankrupt because of you,”

Minhyuk doesn’t respond, instead offering up a pair of finger guns accompanied with a click of his tongue and the greasiest wink Kihyun has ever seen in his life,

“You disgust me,” Kihyun says, wrinkling his nose, “Wait here, I’ll get my jacket. Please don’t go wandering around the hospital,”

“I’m not a child,” Minhyuk protests, crossing his arms and pouting. Kihyun just hums and raises an eyebrow,

“Sure you’re not,” He drawls, “stay,”

“I’m not a dog either,” Minhyuk calls as Kihyun walks away,

“Maybe not, but you’ll always be my little sunshine,” Kihyun whispers, smiling to himself.

 

* * *

 

 

_“Hi there, I’m Minhyuk,” the boy holds out a hand, smile bright, “What’s your name?”_

_His target just stares up at him, and at the hand being offered which he just knows is sticky, without even having touched it,_

_“I’m not interested, so please find someone else to bother with your friendship and sticky hands,” He scowls, turning back to his colouring,_

_“You’re not very nice,” Minhyuk says,_

_“Observant, that’s a good quality. Too bad it seems to be hidden beneath your ineptitude,”_

_“My what?” Minhyuk tilts his head, only having understood about half of what his target just said,_

_“I just called you stupid,” He clarifies, “Now leave me alone please,”_

_“Not until I get your name and a handshake. Daddy says all the best partnerships start with a firm handshake. Well, that and a glass of scotch, but we don’t have any of that, so I’m settling for a handshake,”_

_“Well, seeing as how I have no intention of forming a partnership with you, you can settle for neither,”_

_“No fair,” Minhyuk pouts, “I’m going to tell Ms. Kang that your being mean to me,”_

_Of course, he doesn’t get the chance to do that, as the bell rings right after his statement, signalling the end of the day,_

_“Minhyuk, was it?” Minhyuk nods enthusiastically, “I’m sure you’re probably the type of kid who makes friends easily, what with that sparkling attitude of yours_ _(and the smile to match)_ _”_

_“You think I’m sparkly?”_

_“Shut up. As I was saying, you probably think everyone loves you. But, if I’m being honest, you can get very annoying very quickly. I don’t know who your father is, or where he got that handshake and scotch theory, but I’ll tell you right now, that may work in the business world but that’s not how being a friend works. You have to be likeable and have things in common at the very least, and I can tell that we don’t have much in common, if anything at all. And as far as likeability goes…” Minhyuk’s target trails off, deciding to spare the boy’s feelings, if only a little,_

_“I—“_

_“Anyway, I should get going. I don’t like to make Sebastian have to come in to get me,”_

_“Sebastian? Is your dad a foreigner? You don’t look very foreign. And you call your dad by his name? Is that a—?”_

_“Sebastian’s one of our butlers,” the boy cuts him off, “I like him the most in our house. Also, his name isn’t Sebastian, but I just call him that because I feel like he’s the Sebastian to my Ceil,”_

_“You like Black Butler?” Minhyuk asks, eyes lighting up at the prospect of finally having found a connection,_

_“Yeah. I’m really into anime so…”_

_“Me too!”_

_“Really? That’s awesome. Do you—”_

_“Master Yoo?”_

_The boy turns his head with a sigh, and Minhyuk can see why he calls his butler Sebastian; from the way he’s dressed, to the styling of his black hair, even the shape of his face, everything about him reminds Minhyuk of the anime character,_

_“Sorry Sebastian,” he smiles sheepishly, “I made you wait again. I’ll just put all this away then we can go, okay?”_

_“Okay,” Sebastian sighs,_

_“Ooh, I like your drawing,” Minhyuk says, craning his head to get a better look, “What is it?”_

_“It isn’t anything. It’s called abstract art, Minhyuk. It means you aren’t really drawing anything, just drawing,”_

_“Cool,” Minhyuk nods, the concept very obviously going right over his head,_

_Putting the last of his colouring pencils away, he sighs,_

_“I’m Kihyun,” he smiles slightly, taking Minhyuk’s hand in his own and shaking it three times, “I was right, your hands are sticky,”_

_“Sorry,” Minhyuk chuckles, “I was eating candy earlier,”_

_“Listen, I’m still not sure about your dad’s partnership theory, and I think we might be too young to drink scotch,” Kihyun starts, picking up his drawing supplies and sketchbook, “but if you ever want to hang out, I do make a mean grape juice cocktail,” he offers up one last smile before running over to Sebastian, apologising for the wait. Minhyuk can tell they’re going to be friends for a long time._

 

_“What’s this?” Kihyun asks when Minhyuk shoves a dark purple colouring pencil in his face the next morning,_

_“I thought it would look good in your *_ **_king art*_ ** _,”_

_Kihyun chuckles,_

_“It’s not king art, it’s abstract art,”_

_“Yeah that. It’s a pretty colour, you should use it,”_

_“Thanks, I guess it is quite a nice colour. I’ll be sure to use it,” Kihyun smiles,_

_“Hamster!” Minhyuk exclaims suddenly,_

_“What?” Kihyun blinks at him in bewilderment,_

_“I’ve been trying to decide what animal you’re like. It’s a hamster,”_

_“I can’t tell if that’s a good thing or not,”_

_“Don’t worry, it is. What do I remind you of?”_

_“The sun,” Kihyun says without hesitation,_

_“Because I’m so bright?”_

_“No. Because being exposed to you for prolonged periods of time is hazardous to my health,”_

_“Why must you always use all these big words that you know I don’t understand? What kind of kid even talks like that?”_

_“Not my fault you’re stupid,” Kihyun shrugs, “You’re bright like the sun, yes,” He adds before Minhyuk can protest to being called stupid,_

_“So I guess that’s all settled then,” he smiles his bright sunshine-like smile,_

_“What is?”_

_“You’re the hamster and I’m the sunshine,”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Minhyuk mistaking the word “abstract” for “king” is because ‘king’ (male monarch) is 주상 but ‘abstract’ is 추상


	10. The Fundamentals of Family pt.2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer’s block is a bitch

_**“You’re so mean**_ _ ****_ _ ****_ _ **** ****_to me,” Minhyuk whines for approximately the four thousandth since they set foot in the cafe, draping himself over Kihyun like the world’s most uncomfortable blanket,

“ _Get off_ of me, you are so _heavy,”_ Kihyun grumbles, face pressed against the table under Minhyuk’s weight, “I’m paying for you and _this_ is how you treat me? Unbelievable,”

“I love you Kihyunnie?” Minhyuk offers as compensation for crushing the smaller

“So show it by letting me breathe,”

Minhyuk sighs, peeling himself off of Kihyun in a manner similar to how one would remove a plaster,

“Would you care to explain exactly _why_ you’ve brought us to some random cafe instead of somewhere you own so that, you know, we don’t have to pay?”

“By ‘we’ I think you mean ‘you’”

Kihyun doesn’t respond, choosing instead to glare at Minhyuk,

“But, to answer your question,” he continues, ignoring Kihyun’s glare, “I think it’s important to help people out. So I’m helping someone out by boosting their sales. You know charity work is very close to my heart,”

“How about donating to the Yoo Kihyun Foundation?”

Minhyuk stares blankly at him,

“Forget it. Today’s just not my day,”

“Why, what happened?” Minhyuk takes Kihyun’s hands in his, “Tell Doctor Minhyuk,”

Kihyun pulls his hands away in disgust,

“Well, remember how you were saying that the odds of me seeing _him_ again were practically astronomical?” Kihyun’s eyes get progressively narrower as he speaks, becoming a squinted glare,

“Yeah,”

“10 points for guessing where he works,”

“How would I know where he…” then it clicks, “No. He doesn’t. I mean, the chance of that is—“

“Practically astronomical?” Kihyun raises an eyebrow,

“I’m sorry Ki. I really thought you wouldn’t see him,”

“Whatever,” Kihyun sighs, sipping his coffee, “It’s not like I can ask Hoseok Hyung to fire him,”

“Why not? What’s the point in knowing the president of a hospital if you can’t even use him?,

“For what?”

Minhyuk sighs,

“Let me rephrase that; you have lots of dirt on him, use it,”

Kihyun chuckles,

“Careful Minhyuk, if you keep thinking like that you might just end up like me someday,”

“What a pair we’d make,” he smiles, raising his mug in a toast,

“To our friendship,” Kihyun declares, raising his own mug too, “Just as strong as when we were kids,”

“To the hamster and the sunshine,”

Kihyun snorts, downing the last of his lukewarm coffee,

“Let’s go back, lunch is almost over and I have work to work to do,”

“Already? But you only started today,” Minhyuk frowns, “I thought Jeongyeon would at least let you get settled in before giving you stuff to do. She’s so mean,”

“It’s not like she’s about to let me slack of because I’m her broth—“

“Oh my God,” Minhyuk cuts him off, eyes widening,

“What? What is it?” Kihyun, his back being to the door, starts to turn around,

“It’s nothing!” Minhyuk’s sudden outburst causes him to turn back around,

“What’s with you all of a sudden?”

“Nothing. It’s nothing. I’ll be right back, just…don’t turn around,” Minhyuk gets up hastily, nearly knocking over his chair in the process. Kihyun just shrugs at his friends antics.

 

“You need to leave,” Minhyuk says, grabbing Yoongi by the arm,

“What?” Jimin frowns, “Why?”

“Just trust me,” he looks behind him cautiously, Kihyun’s back is still turned to them, “he hasn’t noticed yet, so you can still leave,”

“Who is ‘he’?” Yoongi asks,

“Kihyun,”

The way the colour drains from Yoongi’s already pale face makes Minhyuk feel sick,

“He’s _here?”_

“Yeah, I’m having a birthday coffee, but that’s besides the point. Just leave before—”

“Before Kihyun notices?”

Minhyuk jumps,

“You scared me,” he says, hand over his heart, “I’m getting you a cow bell for your birthday this year,”

“And _I’m_ the mean one,” Kihyun responds flatly, wrapping his arms around Minhyuk’s shoulders in what is either a hug or the beginnings of a chokehold, “It’s been a long time, Yoongi,”

“Not long enough,” he answers without missing a beat,

“Let’s sit back down,” Minhyuk offers, “it’s rude of you to interrupt my birthday coffee,”

“You finished your coffee five minutes ago,”

“Then we should go. You’re the one who said you have a lot of work to do,”

“I feel like you’re trying to do something,” Kihyun narrows his eyes,

“Who? Me?” Minhyuk responds, placing an indignant hand on his chest,

Kihyun’s expression remains unmoving,

“Oh my God Kihyun,” Minhyuk groans, giving in to the glare, “Let’s just leave them alone, okay? You tormented the poor boy for three years, I think you can stand to leave him alone for at least one day,”

“I just wanted to have coffee with some acquaintances,”

“You are _so—”_

“Let’s do it,” Yoongi cuts him off, earning a surprised look from the other three,

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Let’s have coffee. It’s only some coffee,”

“Yoongi, you don’t have to,” Jimin reminds him,

“I know that, I’m not stupid. It’s not like it’s anything big. It’s only some coffee,”

“Yeah Minhyuk,” Kihyun agrees, “it's only a coffee,”

“My treat,” Yoongi smiles softly, taking out his card,

“Fine,” Minhyuk sighs, “we’ll have coffee with you,”

“Minhyuk, I think you know how I like my coffee by now?” Kihyun tosses a wink at him,

“Unfortunately, yes,” He grimaces, “you and Jimin can take a seat, we’ll be back in a minute,”

Kihyun knows what he’s doing: he can’t leave Kihyun alone, or he’ll get bored and start causing trouble, neither Jimin nor Yoongi know what kind of coffee Kihyun likes, and he just can’t leave Kihyun and Yoongi alone together for any period of time.

 

“You scare him,” Jimin says, taking a seat across from Kihyun,

“What?”

“Yoongi. You still scare him,”

“It’s been seven years, you’d think he’d be over it by now,”

“Over it?” Jimin scowls, “You physically and psychologically abused him for over three years. You don’t just _get over_ something like that,”

“You people and your weird emotions,” Kihyun sighs, sitting back, “You’re all so sensitive,”

Jimin gasps,

“You don’t get to say that. You don’t know what it’s like, to have feelings. You don’t understand sympathy, or empathy or anything like that. You’re not allowed to say _anything_ about people’s feelings,”

“This is exactly what I’m talking about. You’re all so _dramatic,”_

“Dramatic? We’re _dramatic?_ Kihyun-ssi, I’m not sure if you realised this, but Yoongi Hyung is _traumatised_ because of you. You know, he has nightmares about you. He wakes up in the middle of the night, _screaming_ because his mind keeps bringing him back there. Do you have any idea what that’s like?”

“No, Jimin. Enlighten me, what’s it like?”

“We can’t let him sleep by himself anymore. He can’t do anything, be _anywhere_ alone anymore. And I think you know why,”

“Isolation was my favourite punishment for him. I called it his think place,”

“Are you…are you _smiling_ right now?”

“Yeah, So what?”

“ _So what?_ You destroy a man psychologically, you try to _kill_ him, and your response is ‘so what’?”

“It’s not that big of a deal,” Kihyun shrugs, not seeing why Jimin is so upset,

“What made you like this, Kihyun?” Jimin asks, “What happened to make you so cold? Who _hurt_ you?”

Kihyun’s smile falls from his face and he opens his mouth to respond, when Minhyuk sets down his coffee harder than strictly necessary,

“I can’t even leave you unsupervised for even two minutes, can I?”

“No, you can’t. We’re leaving,” he stands,

“But you’re the one who wanted to have coffee with them so badly,” Minhyuk frowns,

“Yeah. I just remembered I have a lot of work to do. We should go,”

“Okay,”

 

Glancing back at Jimin and Yoongi, Minhyuk wonders what Jimin could have said to make Kihyun want to leave so badly.

 

* * *

 

“What did he say to you?”

“What?” Kihyun doesn’t look at Minhyuk,

“Jimin. One minute you were all excited at the prospect of bothering them, the next you can’t get out fast enough. What did he say to you?”

“Nothing,” Kihyun takes a long sip of his coffee, making sure to glare at Tzuyu as they pass,

“If you insist. But you know—”

“You have got to be kidding me,” Kihyun sighs,

“What is it,” Minhyuk frowns, following Kihyun’s gaze, “Oh,”

Tapping her foot angrily with her arms crossed over he chest, is none other than Kihyun’s younger sister, Kim Ri El. She looks the exact same as the day Kihyun left (Minhyuk often said that she looked at lot like Kim Jiwon)

“What is she—?”

“Blame Tzuyu,”

“She looks pissed. I feel sorry for whichever doctor is having to deal with her right now,”

“Yeah, I—swear to God this day can’t get any worse. Hold my coffee,” he pushes the cup into Minhyuk’s hands as he goes over to deal with his brat of a sister,

“—Because you’re a dumbass who can’t do his job properly!”

“Miss, it’s not my job to keep track of our doctors whereabouts,” Changkyun sighs, “But if you want to wait for Professor Yoo to return, you’re welcome to as long as you aren’t disturbing anyone,”

“I suppose you think I have _time_ to be waiting. Well I don’t. So you can either find him _now,_ or else—” Kihyun had forgotten the last time he hit his sister. He never realised how much he missed the satisfaction of seeing the shock on her face every time he hit her,

“How _dare_ you…” her eyes widen,

“You know, I’d forgotten how much I love doing that. I’m not in a great mood today, and you are making it _a lot_ worse right now. How dare _I? How dare I?_ In case you’ve forgotten me, Ri El, I’m three years older than you, so you had better watch how you talk. I bet you think you’re so amazing. Well, I have had it up to here with your stupid self entitlement bullshit. I thought you might have changed since I left, but obviously I was—“

“You don’t get to tell me off anymore,” she cuts him off,

“I beg your pardon?”

“What? You think that you can go missing for years, then just because we happen to meet again the first thing you do is boss me around? I don’t—” it’s almost bothersome to Kihyun, having to exert the energy needed to raise his hand to slap her,

“You’re so _loud_ . Will you _shut up,”_ he’s this close to hitting her again, when Changkyun catches his hand in mid-air,

“Are you out of your mind?” He asks, eyes wide “You _cannot_ do that,”

Kihyun sighs,

“Yah, Kim Ri El,”

She looks up. Kihyun puts his free hand on her head and ruffles her hair harshly,

“I bet you missed your big brother,”

Changkyun swears this day cannot get any weirder.

 

* * *

 

“So, let me get this straight,” Changkyun feels the need to recap everything thing he’s just heard, “you two,” he points at Kihyun and Jeongyeon, “are brother and sister. Kihyun being older,” they nod in agreement, “you two,” he points at Kihyun and Ri El, “are brother and sister, again, Kihyun is older,” they nod, “and the coma patient I’ve been looking after for the past two years, is your brother?”

“That’s right,” Kihyun smiles, “the most dysfunctional family in Korea,” he says proudly,

“This is weird,”

“You get used to it after a while,”

“Anything else I should know?”

“Nothing of importance,”

Changkyun decides to leave that to be addressed at a later date,

“Okay, now that we’re done with my family drama,” Kihyun says, “I believe we have a patient to attend to,”

In all honesty, Changkyun had almost forgotten about their patient in the midst of all the family drama,

“Oh right. Well, before I say anything, there are a few details you should know: your brother hasn’t—“

“I don’t know why you insist on dragging _everything_ out.” Kihyun cuts him off impatiently, “long story short, _you,”_ he glares at Ri El, “don’t get to tell people that your brother’s in a coma anymore. Yippee, celebrations, bring out the party hats and streamers,”

“You’re awful chipper.” Jeongyeon comments, “It’s nice that you’re excited Taeyang is awake, but you have a bad habit of saying weird things at mildly inappropriate times,”

“Come on baby sis, you know how I am,”

Jeongyeon decides that it’s better to not respond to that.


	11. The Fundamentals of Valentines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun has a surprise for Changkyun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s a bit late, but happy Valentines Day Everybody

_**“Happy Valentines Day has,**_ my love,” Changkyun whispers,

“Good morning to you too, Changkyunnie,” Kihyun smiles, hugging Changkyun closer, “What shall we do on this fabulous morning?”

“I was thinking,” Changkyun twists so he’s facing Kihyun, “we could take the day off, spend it together,”

“I like that idea. You stay right here and I’ll make us breakfast. Don’t come down until I say so,”

“Yes sir,” Changkyun laughs,

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Changkyunnie. I love you,”

“I love you too hyung,” Kihyun places a soft kiss on his forehead.

  


“Hyung, this is _so_ nice,” Changkyun gasps, “We’ve been dating for almost a year and I didn’t know you could cook like this. I’ve never had such nice pancakes in my life,”

“I am an amazing cook,”

“And humble too,” Changkyun raises an eyebrow,

“Well, I guess you don’t want pancakes then,” Kihyun sighs, pulling the plate towards him,

“I love you hyung,” Changkyun says hastily, pulling the plate back,

“Listen, I promised Minhyuk I would meet up with him today, but I’ll be back soon. Then, I have a surprise for you, dress nicely,”

“Oh hyung, I hope it’s not too expensive, I don’t have any nice suits,”

“I took care of that,” Kihyun smiles, “check your closet,”

Changkyun frowns,

“What have you done?”

“Nothing, just take a look,”

Changkyun gives him one last accusatory glare before running up the stairs.

“Oh my god,” Kihyun hears a couple seconds later, followed by Changkyun running back down the stairs, “How much did that cost?”

“ _Just_ the suit?”

“There’s _more?”_

“ _Well…”_ Kihyun trails off coyly, “I’m not saying there _is,_ but I also won’t say that there _isn’t_ ,”

“Hyung,” Changkyun stares at him incredulously,

“Well, I wasn’t going to buy a suit without matching shoes, and one can never go without cuff links,”

“Hyung,”

“Don’t look at me like that,” he pouts, “It’s Valentine's Day, I wanted to do something special,”

“This must have cost you a fortune,”

“Would you look at the time,” Kihyun checks his nonexistent watch, “I have to get going, wouldn’t want to keep Minhyuk waiting, now would I? I’ll be back around seven, okay?” He gives Changkyun a kiss on the forehead, “Don’t set the house on fire or anything,”

“I’ll try,” Changkyun quips,

“You’re silly,”

“That’s why you love me,”

“Do I?”

“Yes, yes you do,”

“I’ll see you later,”

“Bye hyung,”

Changkyun waits all of ten seconds after the door swings closed to hop out of his seat and do a little dance. Now, what will he do with a whole house to himself for the next few hours?

 

* * *

 

Changkyun’s half way through the tenth episode of the drama and (just between us) his second ice cream cone, when the doorbell rings. Frowning, he pauses his show to see who would dare interrupt his tv marathon, swearing to poor little Park Bo Gum currently on pause in the background that he shall be avenged,

“Are you Im Changkyun?” The man in the tux asks.

“Yes. Can I help you?”

“I have been sent by Master K to escort you to the rendezvous point,” okay, this is just weird,

“I’m sorry, what?”

“I’ve been told to find you and bring you somewhere,”

“I’m sorry, there must some mistake, I—”

“Sebastian, what’s taking so long?” Minhyuk whines, taking off his baker boy hat, “it shouldn’t be this hard to—oh hi Changkyun,”

“Minhyuk hyung, please tell this person that he’s got the wrong person,”

“Is your name not Changkyun?” Minhyuk frowns,

“Well, it is but—”

“And aren’t you dating Kihyun,”

“Well…yeah,”

“Then we have the right person. Come on Changkyunnie,” Minhyuk grins, pulling his hat back on, “you should probably hurry and put on your suit, we wouldn’t want to keep _Master K_ waiting,” he winks. It couldn’t be…

 

 _“_ So Minhyuk hyung,” Changkyun says from the backseat, “What’s with the outfits?”

“Well, Sebastian here is a butler, so that’s what he wears all the time,”

“And you?”

He smiles at Changkyun through the mirror,

“I’ve been told to play the part. Also, I love hats,”

“So…” Changkyun drags out the word, “where are we going?”

“Now _that,”_ Minhyuk gives the same coy smile Kihyun had on earlier, “That’s a surprise,”

 

“Oh my God,” Changkyun’s jaw drops to the floor. He would recognise this bar anywhere; it’s where he and Kihyun first met. But tonight it’s empty. “What is going on?”

“Your prince awaits,” Minhyuk smiles, tipping his cap. Frowning, Changkyun pushes the door open and makes his way in,

“Hello?” He calls, looking around curiously. There’s a light on in the back room. Changkyun knows his way around this place like the back of his hand (he and Jooheon worked here in high school), “Kihyun?” He frowns, pushing back the strings hanging of hanging beads. This was a VIP room of sorts, it was available to rent but at a crazy price that Changkyun can’t remember,

“Oh my God,” he gasps, covering his mouth. In the middle of the room sits a round table covered by a white table cloth. Sat upon it the most mouthwatering steak dinner Changkyun has ever seen. Completing the picture is none other than Kihyun in the most gorgeous Armani suit, holding a bouquet of white lilies,

“A little birdie once told me that you have a thing for lilies,” Kihyun smiles,

“Hyung, did you do all of this?” Changkyun asks,

“With a little help of course. I would have preferred to ride in on a white stallion, but Minhyuk said that would be too much. We compromised on the white mustang,”

“Hyung, this is amazing. So _this_ is what the suit was for,”

“Yep,” he grins proudly, “I’ve booked out the whole bar for the next few hours just for the two of us. Now, wait here, I have some bubbly in the fridge,” Kihyun heads into the kitchen to grab the wine. Changkyun can’t believe Kihyun would do all of this for him. He must really love him…

 

…too bad it’s all an act.


	12. The Fundamentals of Family pt.3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changkyun should probably learn to mind his own business. Then again, being so nosy can come in handy sometimes

_**“…and you never**_  even _thought_ to call,”

“People tend not to call when they run away from home, hyung,” Kihyun sighs at his brother’s antics,

“Don’t sass me, Ki,” he frowns, “I’m your older brother,”

 _And the bane of my existence,_ Kihyun thinks. Kim Woohyun, Kihyun’s older brother and the most annoying person on the planet, after Minhyuk of course. The two have had a rivalry ever since Kihyun could remember. Woohyun was always upstaging him, if not in school, then in looks, which made no sense to Kihyun because they bore an uncanny resemblance considering,

“We aren’t even related. Also we’re basically the same age,”

“I’m still older,”

“Yeah by, like, a month and a half,” Kihyun rolls his eyes,

“That’s still someth—”

“Cut the crap, _hyung._ Why are you here?”

“Gosh, who put a stick up your ass, Kiki? I just want to reconnect with my baby brother whom I haven’t seen in years. Is that so wrong?”

Kihyun doesn’t respond immediately, taking a few seconds to glare at his stepbrother before sighing,

“I guess Ri El told you about Taeyang?”

“Yeah,” he concedes,

“Follow me,” Kihyun doesn’t wait for a response, turning on his heel and speed walking away,

“You’re so nasty to me, Kihyun-ah,” Woohyun pouts,

“Don’t talk to me,” Kihyun scowls, “I’m not coming home. _Ever_ ,”

“I won’t make you,” he shrugs as Kihyun opens the door softly, “but mother and—“ he closes the door harshly behind them,

“ _Don’t_ call her that,” he snaps,

“Why not? Is she not our mom?”

“She’s _my_ mother,”

“Then…what is she to me?”

“Your father’s wife. Just as my mother’s husband is _not_ my father,”

“Then who is?” Woohyun smirks, “the man who left his wife and kids for some little trollop who could pass for his daughter?” There it is, “Tell me Ki, _who_ is your father? The guy who would rather date some twenty five year old _little girl_ instead of be with his family? The person who…who decided he doesn’t care about his kids anymore?”

“Stop it,” Kihyun clenches his fists tightly,

“The man who couldn’t be _bothered_ to remember his oldest child’s birthday? Who hasn’t so much as called you to even say happy birthday in how long? Ten years is it? He hasn’t called for ten years and you act like he still cares?”

“I _don’t_ think he cares,” he snaps, “I _know_ he doesn’t care, okay? I fucking _know_ he doesn’t a give a shit,” Kihyun shoves his brother away,

“So then why do you keep insisting that we aren’t a family?”

“Because you will _never_ be my family. You will _always_ be outsiders living in my house. You, and Ri El and your father,”

“What about Tae?” Woohyun raises an eyebrow,

“What?”

“I guess Taeyang isn’t your brother then, seeing as how he is my brother, and my father’s son. I mean, we aren’t a family right?”

“Taeyang is different, he’s—“

“How is he different? Because he changed his name so he could be closer to you? Because he would follow you around like a little duckling, or…or because he looked at you like you were his whole world with that sparkle in his eyes that you never even cared to notice because you were too busy being a selfish dickhead to look at your baby brother for more than five seconds and—”

“Stop it,” comes mumbled from across the room. Slightly drowned out by the EKG, Taeyang whispers again, “please stop,”

Pushing Woohyun to the side, Kihyun rushes over,

“What’s wrong?” He frowns, running a hand through Taeyang’s hair

“I…hate…it,”

“Hate what?”

“F…Fight…ing,” he pouts,

“I’m sorry,” Kihyun smiles apologetically, “I didn’t mean to make you sad. Now, stop talking, you’ve only just woken up and we don’t want you to push yourself too hard, okay? Doctor’s orders,”

“Okay hyung,” he smiles and Kihyun ignores the thought in the back of his mind that his dumbass step brother might be right because _damn_ Taeyang really _does_ look at him like that,

“I brought someone for you,” casting a glance backwards, he nods at Woohyun, giving silent permission for him to come,

“Hey there Tae,” he says softly, taking a seat opposite Kihyun and next to Taeyang, “We’ve missed you,”

“Hyung,” he smiles and his eyes light up, but it’s nothing compared to how he was looking at Kihyun a moment ago,

“We’re all very happy that you’re awake. Me, and Ri El, and Jeongyeon, and Kihyun, and mother and father,” Taeyang doesn’t notice Kihyun bristle beside him,

“Anyway,” Kihyun sighs, “We should let you get your rest. I’ll be back later to check on you, okay?”

“Okay,”

“I’m giving you a pass on that one,” Kihyun mutters as he opens the door, “ _Don’t_ let it happen again,”

Swinging the door open, he very nearly walks right into…Changkyun?

“What are you doing here?” Kihyun frowns,

“Me? I should be asking you that,”

“And who might you be?” Woohyun asks,

“Do you ever stop talking?” He sighs, “Changkyun, this is Kim Woohyun, the son of the man married to my mother,” he’s careful not to use any familial terms in the same sentence as his stepbrother and father, “Woohyun, this is Im Changkyun, my…” he falters, trying to think of an appropriate title to give him (‘ex-boyfriend who hates my guts’ is out of the question), “coworker. We’re in the same department,”

“Nice to meet you,” Changkyun smiles, holding out a hand,

“Likewise,” his smile is returned, along with a handshake, “Well, I should get going. You know me, Kiki, all work and no play,”

“Makes Jack a dull boy,” Kihyun quips, knowing that isn’t what his stepbrother meant, “I’ll see you around, _hyung,”_ he knows what it means when Kihyun calls him hyung; it means that he had better make himself scarce, or else. The moment he’s out of earshot, Kihyun turns to Changkyun,

“What were you doing?” He narrows his eyes,

“What are you talking about?”

“I _know_ you were eavesdropping, Changkyun. It’s written all over your face,”

“I was _not_ …” he falters under Kihyun’s stare, “it’s just…”

“Just _what?”_

“I…I’ve never seen you look at anyone like that,”

“Like what?”

“With such…contempt. I’ve never seen you hate someone like that,”

“He wouldn’t be the first,” Kihyun comments, scoffing softly,

“What?”

“Don’t worry about it. Just don’t let me catch you doing it again,”

“I—”

“Changkyun, I have a surprising amount of patience when it comes to you, but I would advise that you don’t push it,”

“Okay,” he hangs his head sheepishly. Kihyun finds himself smiling,

“It’s fine,” He sighs, ruffling Changkyun’s hair softly, “it’s all right if you’re curious. My family is just a…touchy subject. Now, if you’ll excuse me,”

 

Watching him walk away, Changkyun holds the part of his head Kihyun touched. Not that he would ever admit it to himself, but he may, or may not, secretly wish Kihyun would do it again. (He definitely wishes that his heart would stop doing that thing whenever he sees Kihyun.)

 

* * *

 

“Changkyunnie!” Jooheon laughs, grabbing onto Changkyun to slow his run, nearly toppling the both of them,

“Oh my God, you’re not a bowling ball, hyung, slow down,”

“I’m bored,”

“Well, you’re still on call for the next…” Changkyun checks his watch, “three hours,”

“Ugh, that’s _boring,”_ Jooheon pouts,

“Okay, don’t tell anyone, but we could go out for ice cream,”

“You’re the best, Changkyunnie,” Jooheon smiles,  hugging Changkyun tightly,

“I know,” he grins, linking arms with Jooheon, “That’s why you love—”

“I’m looking for Professor Yoo Kihyun,”

Changkyun stops in his tracks,

“What’s up?” Jooheon frowns,

“Be quiet for a second,” Changkyun raises a hand,

“And you’re telling me this because…?” Tzuyu sighs, clearly irritated,

“I…I was hoping you could help me find him,”

“It’s not my job to keep track of hospital staff, sir,”

“I know that, but—”

“What are you doing here?” Kihyun seemingly appears out of nowhere,

“I was just—”

“Just nothing,” Kihyun cuts him off, “Hakyeon, you can’t just _show up._ I have very important work to do, so you have to leave,”

“Kihyun-ah, don’t be like this. Let’s just talk,”

Checking his watch agitatedly, Kihyun sighs,

“I’m giving you three minutes. Which is a lot more of my time than I think you’re worth,” watching Kihyun drag him away, Changkyun swears there’s a split second where he and Kihyun make eye contact,

“What is it?” Jooheon shakes him lightly to get his attention,

“It…It’s nothing,” Changkyun shakes his head, “I just…forgot my jacket. I’ll be right back,”

What is he doing right now? He should be hanging out with Jooheon, enjoying himself. It’s not like he thinks Kihyun’s in danger or anything. It’s not like he’s _worried._ It’s just…he couldn’t have imagined it; that look in Kihyun’s eyes. _Why do I care so much?_ He thinks, resting his hand on the door handle. It’s not like he should, it’s not like he _likes_ Kihyun or anything; he hates him. So then, why? Why is he standing in front of Kihyun’s office? Why is he even thinking about this? It’s just…he can’t shake this feeling that something’s wrong. Changkyun shakes his head. He’s being silly. Kihyun doesn’t need his protection. He isn’t a child, he can handle himself _,_

“You idiot,” Changkyun scolds himself. He sighs, readying an excuse for Jooheon in his head and— was that glass? Changkyun freezes. _Keep going. It’s not your problem._ No, that was definitely something,

“Kihyun hyung?” He knocks. It feels kind of weird when he thinks about it, _this might be a bit intrusive, but I think you’re in danger,_

“What?” He sounds irritated. Of course he is, Changkyun’s being intrusive,

“It’s noth—” the door shakes on its hinges. Once. Twice, “It’s just—” three times and what sounds like a cry of pain,

“Changkyunnie, I’m sorry but I’m going to have to ask you to go away,”

“You’re right,” he sighs, “I was just being silly, I’m sorry,”

“Don’t worry about it, just—” the door shakes a fourth time and Changkyun just can’t help it. Using his shoulder to put some power behind his push, he forces the door open. Maybe he shouldn’t have let his curiosity get the better of him, but he’s glad he did,

“Thanks,” Kihyun mutters from the floor, struggling to catch his breath. There’s remnants of broken mugs scattered around the floor and Kihyun clutches a gushing wound on his arm,

“This…isn’t…over…Yoo,” Hakyeon pants from his spot on the floor. So much for being intrusive.


	13. The Fundamentals of Favours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changkyun learns a bit about Kihyun.

_**“Would you care**_ to explain?” Changkyun raises an eyebrow, carefully pulling out the ceramic shard. It’s longer than he thought,

“ _Shit!”_ Kihyun hisses, grabbing the younger’s hand tightly,

“Sorry,” Changkyun winces, “But I can’t exactly leave it in,”

“I know. Did you call—”

“Minhyuk hyung? Yeah. He’s on his way. So what happened?”

“It’s nothing,” Kihyun sighs,

“Really?” Changkyun questions, “Because the remnants of the mug that I’ve just pulled out of your arm say otherwise,”

“It’s not like I couldn’t handle it,”

He gets no response,

“Okay fine,” Kihyun rolls his eyes, “ I didn’t think it would be anything. I thought we would just talk for a few minutes, I’d curse at him a bit, tell him to fuck off and he’d leave. We’ve been doing this for about a year now, it’s nothing new,”

“A year? But you’ve been abroad until recently,”

“One would be surprised at the tenacity of people,”

“So how did talking turn into destruction of ceramics?”

“Well, I said some things that he didn’t like—it was only the truth really—one thing led to another and we got into a fight. Then you showed up. Thanks for that, by the way,”

Changkyun blushes slightly,

“I…It’s—“

“My poor baby!” Minhyuk cries dramatically, throwing the door open,

“Get out,” Kihyun deadpans,

“Aw Kiki, don’t be like this to me,” Minhyuk pouts, “I came here out of the goodness of my heart and—” he ducks under the pen aimed at his head, “Okay, I’ll stop.” He chuckles, “I’m just worried about you; you’re my best friend,”

“I’m your _only_ friend,” Kihyun reminds him, raising an eyebrow. Minhyuk’s smile fades, his face becomes serious as he crouches in front of Kihyun,

“You know I hate seeing you get hurt,” he frowns, all hints of laughter gone, “I—”

“It was Hakyeon,” Kihyun sighs, “He only wanted to talk, he really did, but I pissed him off,”

“You dumbass,” Minhyuk stands, “I told you to stay away from him Ki, you _know_ how he is,”

“Can you relax? His bark is worse than his bite,”

“What? In case you haven’t noticed, Kihyun-ah, you are having remains of the mug I gave you for your birthday two years ago pulled out of your forearm,”

“You’re being dramatic, Min, he’s not that bad,”

“Not that bad? _Not that bad?_ Kihyun, I know you don’t get scared, ever, but next time you want to do something stupid, try and consider the people who care about you, okay?”

“Minhyuk, stop—”

“No, Kihyun, I won’t stop. What do you think would have happened if it weren’t for Changkyun? Because, don’t forget, Hakyeon is about a head taller than you and a _lot_ stronger,” Kihyun rolls his eyes, “Kihyun, you are my best friend…my _only_ friend. I don’t know what I would do if anything happened to you,”

“I’m sorry,” Kihyun chuckles softly, “I wasn’t thinking,”

“I worry about you Kiki, you know that,”

“Hey, I said I’m sorry, okay? I won’t do it again,”

Minhyuk pulls him into a tight hug,

“I’m sorry I worried you,”

“It’s okay,” Minhyuk sighs, “As long as you’re okay, I’m okay,”

 

Changkyun sits back, letting the two have their moment. He can’t help but smile a little, because the way Kihyun interacts with Minhyuk is so close to the persona he would put on for Changkyun, but there was just one difference; it was real with Minhyuk. He didn’t know how Minhyuk could be so genuinely close to Kihyun for so long, (since they were children, if he remembers correctly). As far as Changkyun could tell, he could never get close to Kihyun like this. He could never see who he really is. It’s nice, seeing him like this. It’s—

“What happened?” Jeongyeon frowns,

“I take it you told her?” Kihyun glares at Minhyuk,

“She’s your sister, of course I told her,”

“The real question is,” she folds her arms, “why didn’t _you_ tell me?”

“I didn’t think of it as a big deal,”

“You’re my big brother, of course it’s a—”

“Don’t worry, Jeongyeon-ah,” Minhyuk sighs, “I already yelled at him,”

“Good. That being said; Oppa, I want you to come home with me next weekend,”

“What?”

“Next weekend. November tenth. Or did you forget?”

Kihyun groans,

“Don’t want to,”

“Kihyun, you have to,” Minhyuk says, “She might actually kill you if you don’t go this year,”

“Wait, what’s on the tenth?” Changkyun asks, feeling very out of the loop,

“My mother’s birthday. Our family throws this huge party every year to celebrate, our whole family comes. Well, _almost_ the whole family; I haven’t gone in five years,” he glares at Jeongyeon, “And I’m _certainly_ not going this year,”

“Oppa, let’s talk outside for a moment,”

 

“Why are you so determined to make me go this year?” Kihyun asks, closing the door behind him,

“Listen, I’ve heard father whispering to mom for the past year,” Kihyun opens his mouth but Jeongyeon cuts him off, “Now is _not_ the time to talk about who’s family and who’s not, just listen. Anyway, he’s been trying to convince her that you don’t actually love her,”

“And I care because…?”

“Because unlike dad—who doesn’t feel the need to see his kids—mom cares about us and expects us to return the favour,”

“Where are you going with this?”

“She’s decided that if you don’t show up next week it means you don’t love her. She’ll stop sending money. And for as much as I know you love _thinking_ you’re independent and don’t need them, our parents’ money does make it easier for you,”

“So I’m being blackmailed by our mom and her husband?”

“Essentially, yes. He’s banking on the fact that you won’t show up, what with the rocky waters the two of you have been since they married,”

“He really is as bad as I thought,”

“Oppa, you’re missing the point. Do whatever you want, I don’t care, but this more important than a cheque every month. This isn’t about the money; he’s trying to cut you out of the family, and I don’t want that. I know we have our differences and we used to fight all the time, but I don’t want to lose you,”

“You say that like you think I won’t go,” Kihyun raises an eyebrow,

“You’re going?”

“If there’s one thing I hate more than more than family get togethers, it’s our stepfather. I’m not about to miss an opportunity to screw him over, even if means coming home,”

 

* * *

 

 

“Minhyuk hyung,”

“Yes Changkyun?” He looks up from his spot on the floor,

“Has Kihyun really not seen his family in five years?”

“Well, that depends on who you classify as his family. He sees Jeongyeon every now and again, they aren’t close per se, but they do talk. The only time he sees most of his family is if he bumps into them somewhere, which rarely happens, seeing as how we moved where we did to get away from them. And then there’s his stepfamily. You met Woohyun, he claims to be older than Kihyun, even though they’re only about a month apart. If you ask me, I think he has a lot of resentment towards Kihyun,”

“I figured. I heard him and Kihyun hyung talking earlier, it didn’t sound like they like each other very much. Why is that?”

“I think it’s because of Kihyun’s mother. You see, Woohyun and his father aren’t very close, so he’s been looking for approval, or whatever, from Kihyun’s mom, which turns out to be quite difficult, because Kihyun’s mom loves him more than anything in the world—you could never get her to say anything or anyone is better than Kihyun.

“And I know that’s what Woohyun really wants: he wants to better than Kihyun, and I can honestly see why. I mean, their the same age, and they could pass for actual brothers—it’s almost creepy how alike they look. They’ve been competing for years; Woohyun’s desperate to beat Kihyun, and Kihyun just hates his brother,”

“That’s sad. You’re family are meant to be your biggest fans, not your rivals,”

“I suppose. But, what can you do? You met Ri El earlier, right?”

“Yeah,” Changkyun shudders, “She was kind of scary,”

“I wouldn’t worry about her. She’s actually only around your age and her bark is a lot worse than her bite. Besides, she’s terrified of Kihyun and, more importantly, what he’d do if he caught her picking on you. I don’t blame her, honestly. I mean, even though they aren’t biologically related, the way he can hit her without any hesitation? I’d be scared of him too,”

“You aren’t?” Changkyun frowns, confused,

“Well, I really don’t know. I’m not…” he falters, trying to figure out the right way to phrase it, “It’s not that I’m afraid that he’ll _hurt_ me, he would never. It’s more that I’m afraid _for_ him; I get worried that he’ll do something that’ll hurt him or someone else. He’s quite harmless, really. He gets agitated and pissed off really easily , but he’s not dangerous,”

“Didn’t he try to kill someone?”

“That’s different, it was a mistake. It was my fault,”

“No it wasn’t, you’re not the one guilty of attempted homicide,”

“I know I’m not, it’s just…I don’t usually let him out of my sight when he gets like that, but I wasn’t paying attention that day. I didn’t think Yoongi would…I didn’t know,”

“I can’t imagine not seeing my family for five years. I don’t know what I would do without them,”

“Well, you’re one of the lucky ones. Not everyone can stay close with their family,”

“I’m lucky?” Changkyun stares at him incredulously, “Says the guy who drives cars that cost more than my college tuition and lives in the kind place that broke college kids save to their Tumblr,”

“I know people like Kihyun and me might _seem_ like we have the perfect lives,” Minhyuk scoffs, “But trust me, I’d rather have a poor family that I can talk to,”

“As opposed to a life most people can only dream of?”

“No. As opposed to being a trust fund baby who hasn’t seen his family since they kicked him out in high school. Look Changkyun, I know you think that we don’t have any problems because we’re obscenely wealthy,”

“You wouldn’t be wrong,”

“But, believe it or not, we actually _do_ have worse problems than deciding which BMW to drive today,”

“What do you—”

“I hope you didn’t miss me too much,” Kihyun announces, posing in the doorway,

“Why are always so extra?”

“I know you love it. Speaking of which…” he trails off coyly, shuffling over to cuddle up against Minhyuk,

“What do want?”

“You know it’s an unwritten rule that I have to bring a date to family things,”

“I’m busy,”

“I’ll never hear the end of it if I show up by myself,”

“So, ask someone else, because I’m not going. Also I hate your family,”

Kihyun scoffs,

“And I don’t? For as much as I can’t stand my family, I actually do have to go. You know how much the twins like to play Cupid and I don’t want them trying to set me up with every Tom, Dick and Harry that walks in. Minhyuk, please,” he pouts softly in an attempt to win him over,

“Ki, I’m sorry but I literally cannot go,”

“You suck,”

“I’m sure someone else wouldn’t mind doing it,”

“I guess so, but—”

“How about you worry about that later,” Jeongyeon cuts him off, “and, for now, you go home to rest,”

“Rest? I’m barely halfway through my first week,” Kihyun frowns,

“I don’t care. A normal person would be seriously shaken by this, so unless you feel like announcing your lack of emotions to the rest of our staff, I’m sending you home. Now, don’t argue with your boss and go home,”

“Yes ma’am,” Kihyun smiles, saluting sarcastically

 

“Oh, shoot,” Minhyuk sighs when they’re in the parking lot,”

“What’s up?”

“I think I left my car keys inside,” he frowns, pretending to feel his pockets to add effect, “I’ll be right back,”

“Take your time,” Kihyun mutters, slightly irritated, “it’s not like I saw you put them in your pocket before we left,”

 

“You want me to _what?”_ Changkyun stares at Minhyuk incredulously, praying that he misheard the older,

“You heard me. I want you to go with Kihyun next weekend. To the party,”

“You have got to kidding me,”

“Well, more specifically, I _need_ you to go with him,”


	14. The Fundamentals of Learning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because Changkyun just can’t help himself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aka the exposition chapter because I’m lazy

_**“Why me?” Changkyun**_  frowns, “Why are you asking me to go?”

“Listen, I know you probably don’t want to,”

“No, I don’t,”

“And I don’t blame you. But I need you to do this,”

“Again I ask, why?”

“Look,” Minhyuk crouches down so he’s looking up at Changkyun, “Kihyun is my best and only friend and I love him. Normally I wouldn’t _dare_ ask you to do something like this, but I know his family and I’m not being dramatic when I say that he _needs_ someone to go with him,”

“So why do I have to do it? Can’t you find someone else?”

“Who else would even be willing? His family already knows me, Hakyeon’s a no-go and pretty much anyone else who knows Kihyun hates him,”

“Yeah, and _I’m_ in that list,”

“Don’t think of it as doing something for Kihyun. Think of it as doing a favour for a Minhyuk who is really _really_ desperate, me. Please, at least think about it,”

“I don’t have to think, hyung, my answer is no. I don’t want to,”

Minhyuk smiles softly,

“I wouldn’t be too sure about that,” he says,

“What does _that_ mean?”

“I can see it, you know, the way you look at him,”

“What, with hatred and disgust?”

“Nope. Well I mean, there is some of that, but I also know you want him back,”

“I don’t…I’m not…no!” Changkyun sputters indignantly, “Absolutely not,”

“I don’t know why you’re pretending, Changkyunnie, I see it in your eyes all the time,”

“What makes you so sure about that?”

“Because I used to look at him like that,”

Changkyun’s jaw drops,

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Close your mouth, you’ll catch flies,” Minhyuk teases, pushing his mouth closed, “but, to answer your question, it was in high school. We actually went out for a while,”

“Seriously,”

“Yeah, I was always his date for family functions and it drove them _mad,”_ Minhyuk’s eyes positively sparkle as he recalls the horrified looks of Kihyun’s relatives as the two held hands for the whole night,

“So what happened?”

“Nothing _happened,”_ Minhyuk laughs, “I just stopped seeing him like that. So we stopped going out and went back to being friends. And that’s how I can so easily recognise that look; I used to wear it for him too. You know Changkyun, he misses you too,”

“What is your point?”

“You should just _tell_ him. Why pretend to hate him when you both know you want him?”

“It’s not that…simple, hyung. It’s complicated,”

“Look, I get it. I mean, that destructive, abusive sociopath is my best friend, after all; I know what he’s like. But even so…” he trails off with a small smile, “Even so, when you can somehow get past all of the walls and facades he puts up, you’ll see that he can be an amazing person,”

“Hyung, I—”

“Don’t say a word,” Minhyuk sighs, “just think about it, okay? As a favour for me, and maybe…” he rises, “maybe as a favour to yourself,”

“How is it…?” Minhyuk stops with a hand on the door handle, “How is it that you can read me so well?” he turns back, grinning in a way that makes Changkyun’s stomach churn,

“Well, _someone_ had to teach Kihyun, didn’t they?”

Changkyun doesn’t say anything.

 

“Found them,” Minhyuk says, twirling the keys on his finger,

“Where were they?”

“In my pocket the whole time,” he laughs, “isn’t that crazy?”

“Very. You haven’t forgotten anything else?”

“Nope, we can go,”

Kihyun eyes his friend suspiciously; he knows Minhyuk didn’t forget his keys, so the real question is: what did he go back for, and why did he lie about it?

 

* * *

 

“Home sweet home,” Minhyuk smiles as they pull into the driveway,

“Why must you be so excited about everything?”

“That’s just my personality. I don’t…” he falters, “wait here a second,” he seems slightly agitated as he steps out and Kihyun hears him say, “What the hell are you doing here?” before he shuts the door,

“Some people just don’t learn,” Kihyun sighs, shaking his head softly as he watches Minhyuk yell at Hakyeon. Kihyun almost pities him, really, the poor guy basically depends on him. The only real reason Kihyun’s kept him around this long is because he’s useful at times, when he isn’t being such a goddamn _mess_. Kihyun swears Hakyeon can’t function without him and—oh. Minhyuk’s just punched him across the face. And again. And again. And—good God, since when did Minhyuk have such strong right hook? Kihyun groans softly, figuring that he should probably do something, lest Minhyuk kill the poor boy.

“Can you _relax?”_ He rolls his eyes as he pulls Minhyuk away from Hakyeon,

“Admittedly, I might have deserved that,” Hakyeon sighs, wobbling slightly as he stands up, “Also, Minhyuk, do you box? Because that is one killer right—” Kihyun cuts him off with a punch of his own,

“You also deserved that,”

“Are you two done hitting me, or can I stand up now?”

“Get up,”

“Can I ask why?”

“Come inside,” Kihyun doesn’t even bother looking at him, turning on his heels and leading the way, “Tea, anyone?” He asks, turning on the kettle,

“Kihyun, stop with the niceties. It’s weird,” Minhyuk frowns,

“Yeah,” Hakyeon agrees,

“Well, that all depends,”

“On what?”

“On whether or not you’re going to explain yourself,” he crosses his arms across his chest,

“Okay, I promise you I can,”

“We’re waiting,”

“I just…I was jealous,”

“Of what?” Kihyun stifles a laugh,

“Changkyun,” Hakyeon hangs his head,

“You have got to be kidding me,” Kihyun And Minhyuk make eye contact and laugh,

“Okay, I know it sounds silly, I mean, we broke up when you were in high school. But we’ve been hanging out for a while now—”

“You mean, I’ve been letting you follow me around,”

“As I was saying,” he tries not to glare, “We’d been hanging out and I _thought_ you were starting to—”

“Like you?” Kihyun raises an eyebrow,

“Let’s say tolerate. I thought that when we met in France, and you said that I should wait for you to come back to Korea…and then you yelled at me in the airport and I…” he falters, “I don’t know. And then you started working at that hospital and you said those things and I couldn’t take it anymore,”

“You got mad because of _that?_ ”

“It wasn’t my finest moment, I’ll admit,”

“Yeah, no shit. Hakyeon, I don’t know how many times—”

“You don’t have to say it, I know,” he sighs. Kihyun chuckles,

“You are _extremely_ pathetic _,_ you know that, right?”

“Yeah,”

“You also know that I just barely tolerate you at times, right?”

“Yes,” Hakyeon slowly looks more and more defeated…and Kihyun loves it,

“With that being said…” he takes Hakyeon’s face in his hands and kisses him, “you aren’t forgiven just yet,” he warns, “I’m putting you on official probation, understood?”

Hakyeon’s eyes light up,

“Understood,”

“Good, because I need a favour,”

“I’m all ears,”

 

* * *

 

“What do you think I should do?”

“How is this even a question?” Jooheon frowns, “You obviously are _not_ going,”

“I know,” Changkyun sighs, “it’s not like I’m actually _considering_ it—”

“Good,”

“It’s rude to interrupt, hyung. As I was saying, it’s not like I’m considering going, it’s just that…I don’t know. It’s just that Minhyuk hyung looked really serious about it,”

“Yeah, And he’s Kihyun’s best friend. Okay, to be friends with someone like that, there has got to be something seriously wrong with you,”

“While that is true, don’t forget, they’ve been friends since preschool. It’s hard to let go of a lifelong friendship,”

“I mean, I just don’t want you to do something stupid,”

“And I _won’t,_ hyung. Like I said, I’m not even going,”

“Good. Any family that can make a kid like Kihyun has to be bad news,”

“You’re right. Now if you will excuse me,” Changkyun checks his watch, “I am officially off the clock,”

“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs, “get coffee or something,”

 

“You thought about that rather quick,” Minhyuk smiles, resting his head on his intertwined fingers,

“I haven’t made up my mind yet, that’s not why I called you,” Changkyun sighs, sipping his coffee,

“Why did you call then?”

“I just…what’s Kihyun’s relationship with his family?”

“Biological, or stepfamily? Because he has a _very_ different relationship with both,”

“Uhm…let’s do step first,”

“Okay then, where should I start?” He taps his chin, “Well, I’ve told you about his weird relationship with Woohyun,”

“Yeah,”

“Well, it’s not like Woohyun is the only member of his extended family that he has a seriously screwed up relationship with. I think you sort of know his other brother, Taeyang,”

“Oh, he’s the coma patient I was looking after. I’m honestly a bit glad that his family didn’t listen to me; see, I said they should think about saying goodbye a while ago, but they just wouldn’t. But then, all of a sudden, his brain activity started to increase and, let me tell you, I have never been so happy to be wrong,”

“I’m sure Kihyun is happy you were wrong, as well,”

“What?” Changkyun frowns,

“Oh, you thought they didn’t want to say goodbye because they loved him that much?” He stifles a laugh, “They wouldn’t dare pull the plug and risk Kihyun’s wrath. It’s actually a bit funny, honestly, how afraid they are of him,” he lets himself laugh this time, “Taeyang is pretty much the only member of his family that he really likes. They wouldn’t _dare_ ,”

“Why is that?”

“It’s…hard for Kihyun to form attachments to people, so when he does, he gets really attached. Taeyang is part of the exclusive group of people that Kihyun loves, and I cannot tell you why. I think it’s because Taeyang admires Kihyun so much that they started to grow close when they became siblings. If you had seen the two when they were younger,” Minhyuk smiles, shaking his head, “Taeyang just had this _sparkle_ in his eyes when he saw Kihyun,”

“I didn’t think Kihyun could be close to anyone,” Changkyun says,

“No, you wouldn’t think so, but he can. Don’t get me wrong, it is exceedingly rare for him, there are only five people in this world whom he truly cares about,”

“Who?”

Minhyuk counts on his fingers,

“Me, Taeyang, his mother, Dowoon,”

“Who’s Dowoon?”

“Our friend from high school. I haven’t known him as long as Kihyun, but the three of us have been friends for a long time,”

“Really? I’ve never heard either of you mention him,”

“It’s a sore subject for Kihyun. I try to avoid bringing him up as much as possible,”

“Why, what happened?”

“He and Kihyun were being dumbasses. We were hanging out on the roof above one of my family’s buildings one day, we were only playing around. Then, when I looked up, Kihyun and Dowoon started pushing each other, but they were being very hush-hush about it so I didn’t know if they were playing, or fighting, or what was happening. Then Kihyun pushes him really hard all of a sudden—like, really _shoves_ him—and Dowoon loses his balance and…” he trails off,

“He fell, didn’t he?”

“We were six floors up,” Minhyuk can’t bring himself to look up from the coffee cup, “All I remember after that moment was me holding Kihyun while he cried and screamed, saying that he’d killed our best friend. I hadn’t seen him like that in years,”

“So, what…what did you do?”

“We did the only thing we could think of; we went downstairs, prayed that we would find him before anyone else. I didn’t want to call an ambulance at first; Kihyun had been getting in a lot of trouble lately and this would been the icing on top of a very big cake. I don’t think I’ve ever cried so hard in my life,”

“Why?”

“I knew that if anyone found out, Kihyun would be screwed. They were going to take my best friend away again, and I was scared. So I did the only thing I could think of; I lied,”

Changkyun’s eyes widen,

“I’m not proud of it, I know it was wrong, but…I just couldn’t risk losing both of them. I made up a story, told to Kihyun to stick to it and answer as few questions as he could. Unsurprisingly, he was a natural at it. I’ve never felt so bad in my entire life; one of my friends almost dies, and I make my other lie about it,”

“So, what did you tell them,”

“I couldn’t make it too complicated, otherwise we could very well have been there all night. It was simple enough: the three of us were hanging out, nothing much. All of a sudden, Dowoon stands up and says, _I bet I have the best balance out of the three of us_ we laugh, because, well, it was silly and random. Then he says _I’ll prove it_ and goes over to the ledge. We tell him to come away from it, _It’s dangerous,_ we say,” he sighs “he’s making his way across the edge, Kihyun and I just laugh, because Dowoon’s always been a bit of a weirdo. Then he starts wobbling, and, naturally, we panic, I mean, we’re six floors up and it’s all concrete below us. We’re too slow, and he slips, and he falls,” he adds, “The End,” Like he’s telling a fairy tale,

“I don’t get it,” Changkyun frowns, “why would you lie?”

“I was scared. I was scared because I thought that if we just told them the truth, they would take Kihyun away. They’d done it before, in high school. They wouldn’t let me see him for almost a month, and when they did, it was always under supervision, we weren’t allowed to hug, we couldn’t hold hands, nothing, ‘no direct physical contact’ they said. I couldn’t let that happen again,”

“How long ago was this?”

“Five years,”

“So, what happened to him,”

“Well, we got him to a hospital eventually, but we cut it really close. After that, he spent the next while in hospital, always in and out of sleep, never awake for more than an hour or two at a time. Then one day, long after he’d been discharged, he fell asleep. We all thought he was just tired, so we didn’t do anything. But then he slept all through the next morning, then the afternoon, and then he didn’t wake up the next day. I started panicking, I mean, I thought he had died or something but he was still breathing,”

“And Kihyun?”

Minhyuk shakes his head,

“He was too far gone by then, he just didn’t care anymore. Anyway, I brought him to the hospital, but they just couldn’t tell what was wrong with him. Then one day, his heart stopped. They managed to bring him back, and we’ve kept him in a medically induced coma ever since. He can’t be awake for more than a day or two at a time until someone can figure out what’s wrong with him. He’s been like this for a while now,”

Then it clicks,

“The files,” Changkyun gasps,

“What?”

“I saw Kihyun going through some files the other day. One was of Taeyang, but I had no idea who’s file the other one was. It must have been Dowoon,”

“Yeah. I miss him, we both do, you know, he was--is an amazing friend. I think, if you ask me, what happened to him is probably why Ki is so screwed up now. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s been through a lot of shit, and it’s really messed him up, but I think if we had just stayed in that night, he mightn’t be this bad,”

“Hyung I…” Changkyun falters, staring into his cup like it’ll solve all of his problems, “I want to go. To the party, with Kihyun. I’ll go,”

“Have I convinced you that easily?” Minhyuk teases,

“It’s not even that, I just…I want to get to know him. The real Kihyun,”

“That won’t be easy, I hope you know,”

“I know. I mean, I know he’s done some pretty fucked up shit, but even so, I…I want to know him,”

“So does this mean you’ll stop pretending to hate him now?”

“I’m not pretending, I _really_ don’t like him. It’s just that, you’re telling all these stories about him and I’m so curious as to who he is,”

“I’ll tell you who he is: he’s my best friend, and, yeah he’s messed up, but I know what he used to be like, and I know that kid is still in there. I also know that you might just meet him someday,”

“I hope I will,”

“Listen,” Minhyuk claps his hands together, effectively lightening the mood, “I have to go, I’ve got a ton of things to do. So I will see you later,”

“Okay, see you later,”

As the two prepare to go their separate ways, Changkyun has a thought,

“Wait a second, I thought you said Kihyun cares about _five_ people,”

“Yeah, and?” Minhyuk frowns,

“You only named four. Who’s the fifth?”

“Well…” He smiles coyly, “you’ll just have to find that out, now won’t you?”


	15. The Fundamentals of Favours pt. 2

**“Leave,”** Kihyun doesn’t even spare him a glance,

“Kihyun, just talk to me,” Hakyeon sighs, following him through the car park,

“Last time you wanted to _talk_ , I ended with ceramics in my arm,”

“I know, and I’m sorry, I just…you weren’t listening to me,”

He stops,

“That’s because you had nothing of interest to say,”

“You wouldn’t know, because I never got to say what I wanted to say,”

“That’s probably due to the fact that I couldn’t care less about what you have to say,”

“Will you just let me speak for a second?”

“No. Because _this_ ,” he gestures between the two of them, “is a waste of my time. And, quite frankly, so are you,” he turns to leave and Hakyeon grabs his wrist, pulling him back,

“Why are you being like this to me? I have tried so hard to talk to you and you won’t give me the time of day,”

“That’s because I don’t _care._ I don’t know how many times I have to tell…” he falters, “stop that,”

“What?”

“You’re squeezing my wrist and it hurts. Stop it,”

“I’m not doing anything,”

“You are. I can feel—” there’s a hand on his other wrist and suddenly he's turning,

“Do you need something?” He frowns at Changkyun. He doesn’t answer immediately, he didn’t think about what he would do next,

“You’re needed…uhm…inside. Yeah,”

“What?” Kihyun frowns,

“Uhm, you have a…consultation,” Changkyun cringes internally. He shouldn’t even be here, what is wrong with him?

“Uh, sure,” Kihyun turns back to Hakyeon, “Do you mind?” He glances at his wrist, “I have a job to do, so unless you want to hold my hand while I deal with a patient, you’re going to have to let go,” he rubs his wrist when Hakyeon releases him, “if I catch you coming here to bother me again, you will regret it,” he warns. Trailing behind Changkyun, Kihyun turns back to him with a smile and mouths a short ‘ _thank you,’_

Hakyeon sighs. He should really stop doing this to himself.

  


Smiling to himself, the blond puts his hands in the pockets of his lab coat and strolls over to the car. Knocking on the window, he grins as Hakyeon lowers the glass,

“You remember me, right?” He smiles, leaning in,

“Yes, I remember you, Hyungwon,” Hakyeon sighs, “what do you want?”

“Some things never change, do they?”

“What’s _that_ supposed to mean?”

“You know Kihyun doesn’t actually care about you, right? You’ll always be nothing more than a toy to him,”

“What is your _point,_ Hyungwon?”

“Nothing, just thought I’d come and say hi. I haven’t seen you since we were in high school. Well,” he corrects himself, “more specifically, when Kihyun, Minhyuk and I were in high school. You were in college then, right? I wonder if anyone ever found out what sort of shenanigans you and your _underage high school_ boyfriend would get up to. Although,” he sighs thoughtfully, “I doubt it, seeing as how you, you know, don’t have _statutory rape_ on your record,” never in his life has Hakyeon wanted to punch somebody so bad,

“You know Hyungwon, it amazes me how some people never change. You are exactly the same as you were in high school, and something tells me that you will be exactly the same for the rest of your life. It’s a bit pathetic, honestly, how you can spend all of your time working to make to make others miserable, but you never stop to think about your own sorry excuse of a life,”

Hyungwon scoffs,

“So what? You think you better than me?” He laughs, “At least I’m not the guy stuck being a glorified errand boy for someone who who could care less about me,”

“Listen Hyungwon, I am _not_ having this conversation with you, okay? I will live my life however I want and you can…Well…you can try and figure out why you haven’t any friends,”

“I have friends,” Hyungwon sputters indignantly,

“Sure,” he drags out the word, “if you would please step away from my car so I can leave,”

Hyungwon drops his hands, taking a step back, and watches Hakyeon drive. He sighs. He should learn to mind his own business. But still…

  


_Hyungwon sighs, looking out the window. He hates high school; it’s boring and the people are stupid and—oh, what’s this? He groans internally. Kihyun sits in the courtyard with Minhyuk, Dowoon and…ugh, and Hakyeon. He still has no idea how any self respecting college student would willingly date a seventeen year old high school student,_

_“Wonnie, what are you up to?” He pulls his eyes away from the window for a second to glance at Hoseok,_

_“Nothing,”_

_“You know, you should go down there. Talk to someone, anyone. You have more friends than just me. I mean, everyone in the school loves you,”_

_“Not everyone,”_

_Hoseok looks over Hyungwon’s shoulder through the window,_

_“Kihyun?” He frowns, “I thought you didn’t like him,”_

_“I don’t._ I’m _the one who dumped_ him, _remember?”_

_“Yeah, but people make mistakes. You could be regretting it,”_

_Hyungwon scoffs,_

_“Please. Breaking that loser’s heart was probably the best decision I’ve ever made,”_

_“Maybe it was good for_ you,” _Hoseok points out, “but look it what it turned him into,”_

_“That’s not my fault,” Hyungwon objects,_

_“His life falls apart and then you tell him you don’t love him? You left him right when he needed you most. It may not have been entirely your fault, but it was definitely the straw that broke the camel’s back,”_

_He sighs,_

_“I don’t want to talk about this right now, hyung,” he turns away from the window, “I’m going outside. Follow me…or don’t. Do whatever,”_

_Casting a final glance outside, he notices that Hakyeon is gone._

  


_Smiling to himself, the brunet puts his hands in his pockets and strolls over to the car. Knocking on the window, he grins as Hakyeon lowers the glass,_

_“Hi there,”_

_“Do I know you?” Hakyeon frowns,_

_“I’m Hyungwon. Chae Hyungwon,”_

_“Have we met before?”_

_“I don’t think so. You’re dating my ex; Kihyun. I’m sure you know him,”_

_Hakyeon nods,_

_“And?”_

_“Do you have a thing for high school boys, or is it just Kihyun?” He asks innocently,_

_Hakyeon bristles slightly,_

_“How is that any of your business?”_

_“I’m just saying,” Hyungwon shrugs, “I’ve never met a self respecting college student without some deep seated issues that would date a seventeen year old,”_

_“Whom I date is none your business, Hyungwon,”_

_“Of course not, I was only—”_

_“What are you doing?” Kihyun grabs Hyungwon’s wrist,_

_“Hey there Kiki,”_

_“Don’t call me that. What are you doing?”_

_“We’re just talking,”_

_“Well, don’t. Don’t talk to my boyfriend,” he frowns, pulling Hyungwon back a bit, “Hakyeon, go,”_

_“But—”_

“Now,”

_Hyungwon sighs,_

_“Can’t I just have a conversation with someone?”_

_“No. No you cannot, because that_ someone _is my boyfriend and I don’t want you around him,”_

_“Bit possessive, aren’t we Ki?”_

_“Why are you doing this? We had an agreement; I stay away from you and you stay away from me. I don’t talk to Hoseok hyung, do I? No, so you don’t get to talk to Hakyeon,”_

_“Relax, will you? It was a once off,”_

_“It had better be. If I catch you making a habit of getting involved in my life, you’ll regret it,”_

 

* * *

 

“What was that for?” Kihyun frowns, “My day hasn’t started yet, and my first consultation isn’t until later,”

“I know, I just…” Changkyun sighs, “It’s nothing,”

“Were you _worried_ about me?” Kihyun smiles,

“Absolutely not,” He says indignantly, “I was just…I must have misread the schedule, sorry,”

Kihyun raises an eyebrow and Changkyun knows he’s not buying it,

“Why don’t you save us both a lot of trouble and just admit that you still like me?”

“I _don’t—”_ He cuts himself off with a sigh, he’s really not in the mood for Kihyun right now, “It wasn’t about any _nonexistent_ feelings I have for you. What I did is called basic human decency, a concept which you probably don’t understand because you don’t do anything for people unless it benefits you,”

“That’s not true,”

“Oh is it not? I don’t believe you,”

“I’m slightly ambidextrous,” he says suddenly,

Changkyun blinks at him,

“And this is relevant because…?”

“Because I got good at using my left hand after I had a chair broken over my back and couldn’t use my right arm for three months,”

“What?”

“It was a while ago. We were in middle school, no, high school…”

  
  


_“I hate to bother you, Hoseok hyung,” Kihyun says, “But have you seen Minhyuk? Dowoon and I can’t find him anywhere,”_

_Hoseok frowns, thinking,_

_“I could be wrong, but I think I saw him and Wonnie go into the classroom together,”_

_“Hyungwon? Why would he be with Hyungwon?”_

_“I don’t know,” he shrugs, “I think some of the kids from the other class followed them in. They were all carrying chairs,” his eyes light up, “Do you think they’re playing musical chairs? Without me? Wonnie knows I love that game,”_

_Kihyun tries not to facepalm because,_ really? _Hyungwon left Kihyun for_ this _idiot? He’d be offended if he still cared that much,_

_“Okay, ignoring that mini-tangent,” Dowoon says, “Do you remember which classroom they went into?”_

_“I think it was class 1–3,”_

_“But why would they go there?”_

_“You don’t think…” Hoseok trails off,_

_“What?” Kihyun frowns, “Think what?”_

_Dowoon gasps,_

_“You don’t think…”_

_“Think_ what?” _Kihyun sighs in aggravation,_

_“I’ll tell you later,” Dowoon grabs his arm, “but right now, we have to go,”_

 

_“What’s wrong?” Kihyun frowns, trailing slightly behind him,_

_“It’s nothing, I thought it was nothing, but I overheard Hyungwon talking to Hoseok the other day, I didn’t think anything of it then, but now…”_

_“What did he say?”_

_“I don’t remember exactly, but he said he would get back at…” he slides the door open, “Minhyuk,”_

_Hyungwon looks up,_

_“Well, fancy seeing you here,” he smiles, “I assume you came for this,” he looks down at Minhyuk, who’s sat on the floor, badly bruised and not moving,_

_“What did you do?” When no answer comes, Kihyun asks again, louder, “Hyungwon, what have you done?”_

_“Hope you don’t take it personally, Kiki, it’s nothing against you, honestly. It’s just that your friend over here,” he nudges Minhyuk softly with his foot “needs to learn to give up. You know what they say about poking sleeping bears,” he pulls up a chair, “I hate to do this, really I do. I thought we could just avoid each other and all would be good. But someone doesn’t know how to keep his mouth shut, so now we’re here,” he picks up the chair by the back, “I’m sure you’ve heard the saying; eye for an eye,” he raises it up, starts to bring it down, and Kihyun doesn’t even think before diving in front of Minhyuk, effectively acting as a human shield._

  


“You got a chair smashed over your back for him?” Changkyun asks with wide eyes,

“Yeah, it hurt like shit,” Kihyun sighs, “But I just couldn’t let Minhyuk get hurt, you know. I mean, he’s my best friend. I’m sure you would do the same for Jooheon,”

“I mean, we’re super close, sure, but to have a chair smashed over my back for him?” Changkyun suddenly feels like a bad friend; here’s Kihyun, ready to die for Minhyuk, and Changkyun won’t even get his damn arm broken?

“I mean, that’s probably not normal, anyhow,” Kihyun laughs, “I’m sure everyone loves their friends, but we all have limits, you know. Besides, I doubt anyone _expects_ a friend to go that far,”

“I mean—”

“I hate to interrupt,” Kihyun says, checking his watch, “but for as much as I love this little chat, I have something important to do,”

“But you said your consultation wasn’t until later,” Changkyun frowns,

“It’s not that, but it’s important, and I’ll be dead if I’m late,”

 

* * *

 

“I know, I know; I’m late,” Kihyun sighs, closing the door behind him and taking off his lab coat, “But I promise you it’s not my fault,”

“Well, whatever your reason, it had better be good,”

“Trust me, it—“ He stops in his tracks,

“Took you long enough to notice,” Dowoon smiles, “So…what did I miss?”


	16. The Fundamentals of Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun reconnects with an old friend and hopes a certain someone hasn’t made a mess for him.
> 
> Meanwhile, Minhyuk makes a very troubling discovery about himself

**“Oh my God,”** Kihyun laughs almost hysterically, “You’re awake,”

“Really? I hadn’t noticed,” Dowoon deadpans, making an attempt to sit up. He abandons it quickly and remains lying down,

“I’ll let that one slide,” Kihyun smiles, sitting next to the bed, “when did you wake up?”

“Last night. Around 10,”

“I told Tzuyu to call me the next time you woke up,” Kihyun frowns, clicking his tongue, “That girl is good for nothing,”

“Hey, don’t blame Tzuyu,” Dowoon chuckles, “she never even came in here. She couldn’t have known,”

“You always let her off too easy,”

“Yeah, and you were always so hard on her. Remember when she and Jeongyeon would sneak into your room sometimes?”

“I kept telling them not to touch my stuff, and they wouldn’t listen,”

“Yeah. They only stopped because you hit Jeongyeon that one time,”

“It was once,” Kihyun rolls his eyes, “she got over and they didn’t bother me again. Jeongyeon and I actually get along great,”

“And the rest of your family?” Kihyun’s scowl tells him all he needs to know, “still the same?”

“Pretty much,”

“Well come on, it’s been, like, three years, there’s got to be something you can tell me,”

“Well…” Kihyun tries, and fails, to hide a smile, “There’s this guy,”

“Ooh, a boy,” Dowoon wiggles his eyebrows,

“Shut up. So there’s this guy—Changkyun,”

“Sounds interesting. You like him?”

“He hates me,”

“That wasn’t my question, Ki,”

“Well, maybe,”

“Cute, Ki has a crush,”

“Stop it,” Kihyun whines, “I’m serious. It’s been over a decade since I’ve felt like this, I didn’t think I would—”

“Fall in love again?”

“I don’t _love_ him, you’re being dramatic,” he pouts, “I don’t know, he’s just…special,”

“Well, would you look at that, I never—” he’s cut off when Kihyun’s phone rings. Kihyun’s sigh tells Dowoon that the elder isn’t too excited about whoever’s calling him,

“What do you want?” Dowoon can’t hear the voice on the other end, so he’s forced to decipher the conversation from Kihyun’s responses,

“I’m at work. You should know this, I saw you like, five minutes ago,”

His eyes widen,

“You’re _what?_ What the hell is wrong with you? Actually, don’t answer that. Did anyone see you come in?” He closes his eyes and Dowoon hears him count down from ten quietly, “Okay, here’s what you’re going to do. Listen up because I won’t say it again; you are to stay put and not go anywhere until I get there. Are those instructions simple enough for you to understand?”

He sighs,

“What’s up?” Dowoon asks, frowning,

“Don’t worry about it,” Kihyun smiles softly, but startles the younger when he says harshly to whomever he’s on the phone with, “Not you,” he pats Dowoon’s leg in a silent apology when the younger jumps at the tone of his voice, “You’re dead when I find you,” he turns back to Dowoon, sighing for the third time in ten minutes, “I’m sorry, but I’ve to go,”

“Who were you talking to?”

“Someone who I’m starting to think is more trouble than they’re worth,” he gets a confused look, “it’s not a big deal, I just need to make sure he doesn’t make any more messes for me to clean up,”

“Okay,” he frowns softly,

“Don’t look at me like that. I’m a grown man, I can handle myself,”

“I know you can, I just—”

“Seriously,” Kihyun smiles, patting his head and standing up, “don’t worry about me. Just worry about you; you’re the sick one, remember?”

“That’s true,”

“I’ll see you later, okay?”

“Okay,”

It’s not necessarily that Dowoon is _worried_ for the older; he just knows that Kihyun had a tendency to put himself in the worst situations. He just really hopes that he has grown out of it.

 

_“Ki, are you sure this is safe?” Minhyuk frowns from the back seat, watching Kihyun put the car in gear,_

_“Of course not,” he smiles, “that’s why we’re doing it,”_

_“Maybe I should just wait outside,” Dowoon says, reaching for the door,_

_“No,” Kihyun locks the doors, “We’re in this together,”_

_“Why is it,” Minhyuk frowns, “that every time you go drag racing, we’re forced to tag along?”_

_“Because I want you guys to experience the fun as well,”_

_“But—”_

_“Quiet, it’s starting,” he watches the girl intensely as she raises the checkered flag. As an undefeated drag racing champion, Kihyun takes this very seriously. The moment the flag touches the ground, he slams on the gas pedal, and Minhyuk and Dowoon hold on for dear life for the third time that week. Kihyun had been forcing the two to go with him to drag races for a while now, hoping they could appreciate the adrenaline rush of the high speeds, but his two friends had no interest in the ‘sport’. But he wouldn’t let that stop him from dragging them both to every race._

 

 

“Are you out of your mind?” Kihyun slams the door behind him,

“That was fast,” Hakyeon observes, closing the book in his hands,

“Answer my question. Why are you here? If _anyone_ saw you come in—”

“Relax,” Hakyeon sighs, “no one saw me, okay? I was super careful,”

“It was still irresponsible of you to come here. This is important to me and I _cannot_ have you screwing up everything I’m working for. I—”

“Kihyun, chill,” he puts his hands on Kihyun’s shoulders, “I promise you, nobody saw me. I may not be smart like you, but I’m not an idiot,”

“Good,” The younger sighs, opening his arms to let Hakyeon hug him, knowing the older had a reason for coming,

“What was the point of this morning, anyway?” Kihyun knows he’s referring to their pretend fiasco in the parking lot,

“Changkyun is never going to outright _say_ that he still wants me, and he won’t let me go to him. So I’m going to need him to make the first move,”

“Which he did,” Hakyeon slowly connects the dots, “when he pulled you away from me. He thought I would hurt you and was worried,”

“I guess you aren’t as slow as I thought,” Kihyun smiles, pulling away from the hug, “And now I know just how much work I have to do to get him back,”

“You’re terribly conniving, even when it comes to romance,”

“People like to be wooed, darling,” he smiles condescendingly, “This is simply the art of wooing a man,”

“Should I be taking notes?” Hakyeon chuckles,

“You’re silly,” Kihyun says, taking the older‘s face in his hands and giving him a kiss, “Now be gone with you,” he steps back and shoos Hakyeon away, “You’re great company and all, but I have work to do, and you are a distraction,”

“Okay, work hard,”

Kihyun scoffs,

“You’re not off the hook yet,” he reminds,

“Then I guess it’s actually _me_ who has to work hard,”

 

* * *

 

 

_Jimin remembers when he first noticed that something was off with Yoongi and Kihyun. Yoongi had been very on edge over the past while, but whenever Jimin would ask the older about his weird behaviour he would be brushed off with a simple ‘don’t worry about it,’ or ‘it’s nothing’ or the most frequent, and frustrating, excuse, ‘I just had too much coffee’. He was starting to believe Yoongi’s excuses, trusting the older to tell him if anything was indeed wrong. Jimin really should have known better. He wasn’t sure how he had missed all of the clear red flags, like, who wears a turtleneck in July? And well, while Yoongi wasn’t particularly talkative the way Hoseok was, he had become even more quiet and withdrawn than usual, and the way he would apologise for every little thing from spilling a drink to talking over someone (even if he was talking first). The way he would always be so tense whenever Kihyun was around and would flinch if anyone moved suddenly; Jimin really should have noticed sooner. He couldn’t tell how long Yoongi had so clearly been afraid of Kihyun when he finally noticed the unusual (to put it lightly) dynamic between the two. He and Yoongi, along with Kihyun and Minhyuk, were hanging out at a cafe, having fun and laughing when Jimin saw it; Kihyun—who was in tears of laughter after a particularly funny joke from Minhyuk—raised a hand to offer a high-five to Yoongi—who had been relatively silent that day, keeping his head down and occasionally adding to the conversation—and that was when it clicked for Jimin. When Kihyun turned to the older with a raised hand and Yoongi tensed and turned his head away, that’s when Jimin thought; that’s not how you react when you’re expecting a high five, that’s the way you react when you’re expecting to get hit. And Jimin knows, and he feels his heart break for the older. Because Jimin has only just realised: Kihyun hits Yoongi._

 

“Why did you call me?”  Jimin frowns in to his coffee, “I forgot you even still had my number,”

“I just wanted to talk, you can’t blame me for that,” Minhyuk smiles,

“I just don’t want you to get the idea that we’re going to be friends or something,”

“Aw, you’re so mean, Jiminie,” Minhyuk pouts. Jimin scoffs,

“Isn’t that extremely hypocritical of you? Considering the fact that you _knew_ Kihyun was being abusive to Yoongi hyung and did _nothing?”_

“Can’t we put the past behind us? Forgive and forget?”

“Well, when he stops being _traumatised,_ courtesy of your best friend, then we can talk,”

“How is Yoongi, by the way? I feel like it’s been ages since I saw him last,”

“You saw him five days ago,” Jimin points out,

“Like I said, ages,”

“He’s been doing…better,”

“That’s good,”

“He started a charity,”

“Really? For what?”

Jimin doesn’t break eye contact as he slowly sips his coffee and says,

“Domestic abuse victims,”

“That sounds…great. It’s good to do something productive, you know. Give back to society,”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,”

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

“I’m sorry?”

“I mean, you knew. You knew what Kihyun was like and not only did you not say anything, you actively ignored it,”

“Yeah, and I felt like shit because of it. I’m not going to pretend I didn’t do anything wrong, I know I should have said something, _anything_ ,”

“So why didn’t you?”

“You don’t get it.” Minhyuk sighs, “I learned a long time ago, the hard way, that there’s no talking Kihyun out of something. If he wants to do something, he’s going to do it, and I’ve learned to accept that,”

“So what, you just _let_ him abuse my friend for _three years_ because you’re scared of him?”

Minhyuk makes a sound somewhere between a scoff and a laugh,

“I’m not _afraid_ of my best friend. I just didn’t see the point in doing something that wouldn’t have done any good,”

“That’s not a reason to not do anything,” Jimin scowls, becoming more and more agitated, “You let Yoongi hyung be psychologically tormented for years because your friend is stubborn. Do you have _any_ idea how heartless that is? You could have helped him, you could have done something and you didn’t,”

“That’s not—”

“Do you want to know the worst part of all of this? You’re _still_ sat on your stupid high horse of ‘I’m not _that_ bad, my best friend is a sociopath so I’m basically Mother Teresa in comparison’. You like to pretend that you’re because you aren’t _as bad_ as Kihyun, that you’re somehow a good person, well you’re not. I may not like Kihyun, but at least he _knows_ how bad he is. At least he doesn’t try to pretend to be a good person,”

“Okay, you know what, no. Don’t give me that. Don’t blame me because your friend was too fucking stupid to figure out that Kihyun didn’t even like him anymore,” That’s the last straw for Jimin. He takes the lid off his coffee and throws it at Minhyuk,

“How _dare_ you?” He’s positively _fuming,_ “You have no right to say that about Yoongi hyung, _none_ . I don’t care if you’re a bad person, but the _least_ you could do is own it,” he chuckles humorlessly, “You know, I was wrong about you Minhyuk hyung. I thought you were just as bad as Kihyun, but you’re not. You’re worse than he could _ever_ be,”

 

“Kiki, do you think I’m a bad person?” Minhyuk asks when he and Kihyun are in bed for the night,

“Why are you asking?” Kihyun frowns. This is mildly out of character for Minhyuk,

“I don’t know, it’s just…I never say anything when you do bad things, I just cover it up or take the fall for you,”

“And?”

“And well, I think we’re both aware that that isn’t a good thing,”

“It’s a bad thing, yes. We’re both well aware of that,”

“It’s just that, if bad people do bad things, and _I_ do bad things…wouldn’t that make _me_ …a bad person?”

“Minhyukkie, I don’t think bad people are particularly worried about being bad people,”

Minhyuk shrugs because Kihyun does have a point,

“So do you want to tell me what brought this on?”

“Well, I saw Jimin earlier. We got coffee,” he raises an arm to allow Kihyun to turn over to face him,”He told me I was a bad person for not saying anything about you and Yoongi,”

“That’s not your fault. You’re used to covering for me, and you know that you can’t talk me out of things,”

“Well, _I_ know that, but most people don’t understand our weird relationship,” Minhyuk points out,

“Listen, don’t worry about it,” Kihyun smiles, taking Minhyuk’s face in his hands, “You are _not_ a bad person, okay? You’re a good person who feels a need to do bad things to protect the _actual_ bad person; me,”

“You aren’t a—”

“Don’t worry about making me feel less bad, I am very much a bad person,” Kihyun smiles, “and you _are_ a good person. Even if I have corrupted you a little bit,” he chuckles, “now go to sleep,”

Minhyuk supposes Kihyun is right. He’d spent so much of high school worrying that he would lose Kihyun again, that covering up and taking the fall for all the shit Kihyun does has just become a habit at this point.

 

_“—Because you can’t fucking do anything right!” Yoongi covers his head and ducks as Kihyun throws a glass at him. It just barely sails over his head and smashes against the wall behind him,_

_“Babe, I said I was sorry,” Yoongi says. He’s shaking and cut all over his hands from the glass Kihyun’s been throwing at him for the past ten minutes,_

_“Sorry? You think sorry is going to fix this? How many times? How many times did I tell you, ‘don’t leave the room’, ‘this is important business’, ‘you’ll screw it up if they see you’? I told you how many times, and what do you do? You just waltz out like you fucking own the place and just casually introduce yourself. Do you have any idea the kind of mess you made?”_

_“No,”_

_“Exactly, you don’t. You don’t even know what you did and I still have to fix it,”_

_“You know, I’m honestly surprised that no one else has heard you yet,” Minhyuk says, leaning against the doorframe with his hands in his pockets, “I mean, if you’re going to do this to poor Yoongi, at least make sure they can’t hear you all the way back in Seoul,”_

_“Sorry, did we wake you up,”_

_“No, I was just thirsty. You’re lucky the others appear to sleep like the dead,” he comments, opening the fridge, “also, I know we don’t come to Busan very often, but I would appreciate if you didn’t destroy all of our glassware every time we come,”_

_“You know I always buy you more,” Kihyun smiles, “no one even notices,”_

_“Well, there was that one time you were short by five glasses. My parents noticed,” he and Kihyun chuckle at the memory, “by the way, do you think this mess,” he gestures vaguely between Kihyun and Yoongi, “will be sorted soon, or do you want to sleep with me tonight?”_

_“I’ll sleep with you,”_

_“Cool,” he shrugs, putting the glass back in the cabinet, “see you later,”_

_As he leaves, Yoongi realises something; Minhyuk didn’t even look at him once._


	17. The Fundamentals of Fake Dating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Admittedly, Changkyun is a bit wary about doing this favour for Minhyuk. But what’s the worst that could happen? It can’t be that bad, right? Yeah, Changkyun is either overreacting, or he’s totally screwed. (He’s currently leaning towards the latter)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Date published: 5/6/19

_2 years ago…_

 

 ** _“You’re really serious_**   _about this, aren’t you?” Kihyun raises an eyebrow, watching Changkyun fold a T-shirt, “I think you’re being a bit dramatic about this,”_

 _“No hyung, I am not being_ dramatic _,” Changkyun says, closing the box with tape, “I wouldn’t consider it dramatic to break up with someone who’s been gaslighting you,”_

_“Oh will you get over that?” Kihyun rolls his eyes, “I said I was sorry,”_

_“Well ‘sorry’ doesn’t fix this, hyung,” Changkyun snaps, “You can’t solve emotional abuse with a simple apology, life doesn’t work like that,”_

_“So what will work, then? Because I don’t want to lose you over something as silly as this,”_

_“This isn’t_ silly, _hyung. This is serious,” Changkyun sighs,_

_“It’s not a big deal, Changkyunnie,”_

_“What the hell is wrong with you?” Changkyun asks, throwing down the shirt. Side note: since when did he even own this much clothing? “This is hardly ‘not a big deal’, okay? This is a_ very _big deal and it worries me that you aren’t taking this seriously,”_

_“That’s because you’re overreacting,” Kihyun says, crossing his arms,_

_“You can’t be serious right now,”_

_“Okay look, if you could relax for a minute and_ stop _with the agitated packing,” he grabs Changkyun’s wrists, “if I make us lunch, will you talk to me?”_

_Changkyun frowns softly,_

_“I don’t—”_

_“Are you done packing?” Jooheon appears out of nowhere, leaning against the door, making Changkyun lose his train of thought,_

_“All done,” He says, smiling shortly, “You know, how about instead of trying to manipulate me into staying with you,” he scowls at Kihyun, “you maybe consider what kind of psychopath doesn’t think of motional manipulation as something to be concerned about,”_

_“Well if you want to get technical about it, I’m a sociopath,”_

_“_ That _is beside the point,” Changkyun points out._

 

_“I really do care about him, I hope you know,” Kihyun says to Jooheon when Changkyun is gone and it’s just the two of them,_

_“Good,” Jooheon crosses his arms, “then don’t ever come near him again,”_

_He closes the door behind him and for the first time in over a year, Kihyun feels alone._

 

* * *

 

“You know you don’t have to go, right?” Jooheon asks for approximately the hundredth time,

“Yes hyung,” Changkyun sighs, “I was aware the last time you asked, and I’ll still be aware the next time you ask,”

“I just don’t understand why you would voluntarily do something like this. I thought you hated Kihyun hyung,”

“I did,” that’s not right, “I _do_ , but I’ve told you, this isn’t about Kihyun. I’m only doing this as a favour to Minhyuk hyung,”

“Couldn’t he find someone else to go?”

“No,” Changkyun says, zipping his suitcase, “Minhyuk can’t go and no one likes Kihyun, so I was his only option. He appealed to my humanity,”

“I just—”

“Hyung, relax,” Changkyun smiles, “I’ll be back on Monday,”

“You know I worry about you,”

“And I appreciate it, but this isn’t high school anymore. We’re both grown ups and I can take care of myself, okay?”

“Okay,” Jooheon sighs, “When are you coming back?”

“I’ll only be gone for the weekend, then when I come back we can have coffee or whatever, and talk and I’ll tell you all about it. I promise,”

“Fine. Remember what I always say; have fun, be safe and most importantly…”

“Don’t die,” Changkyun finishes with a smile, “I can guarantee two of those, and at least one is that I won’t die,”

 

“I’m sorry about this,” Minhyuk smiles apologetically,

“Minhyuk will you stop?” Kihyun sighs, “He’s only pretending to be my boyfriend for the weekend, not giving up a vital organ,”

“The second option might be less painful,” Minhyuk comments,

“It can’t be _that_ bad,” Changkyun says, “I can handle it,”

“You _clearly_ haven’t met my family,” Kihyun closes the boot of his car, “I hate most of them anyway,” he says “so you probably won’t have to meet too many,”

“Great?” Changkyun frowns, feeling very conflicted on how he should feel about that,

“I feel like I’m sending poor Changkyun into a lion’s den,” Minhyuk chuckles,

“Relax. He’ll have me,” Kihyun points out,

“That’s what I’m afraid of,”

“Shut up,” he smiles, punching Minhyuk in the arm softly before pulling him into a hug,

“We’ve never spent so much time apart, whatever will I do without you?”

“You’ll survive. I’m only gone for the weekend,”

“But you’re my only friend, I’ll be lonely,”

“Go visit Dowoon or my brother or something. You’ll get to talk shit about me behind my back,” Kihyun raises an eyebrow,

“That _does_ sound very enticing,”

“See, you’ll be fine without me,”

“I’ll still miss you though,” Minhyuk pouts, pulling away,

“You’re such a child,” Kihyun says and he laughs, because, well, it _is_ kind of true; Minhyuk had always been a bit anxious when it came to letting Kihyun go places on his own, but it was only because he was worried about him.

 

“Give it,” Kihyun sighs, taking a hand off of the wheel and holding it out to Changkyun,

“What?” He frowns innocently,

“I know Minhyuk gave you my meds. Give it here,”

Changkyun sighs in defeat, taking the bottle out of his jacket pocket,

“He told me not to give them to you,”

“And yet here we are,” He comments, turning the pill bottle over in his hands, “he’s putting me on Benzos?” he chuckles softly, “can you believe it? Minhyuk is putting _me_ on _Benzodiazepines_. Isn’t that hilarious?”

“Not really,” Changkyun looks extremely concerned and mildly confused,

“Don’t worry, I won’t need them,” Kihyun sighs, dropping the bottle into Changkyun’s lap, “The other one?”

“What?”

“There’s no way he gave you just one. Give me the other one,”

“So bossy,” Changkyun mumbles under his breath, not entirely serious but not quite joking either,

“That’s the one,” Kihyun puts the bottle in his pocket,

“What are those even for?” Changkyun frowns,

“Well, what would you do if I intentionally crashed this car, right now? Maybe swerve and hit another car, or else just drive straight into a wall?”

“I would be very panicked, and probably terrified,”

“Well then you probably won’t be comforted by the fact that I’ve thought about doing it nine…” he pauses, “ten times since we started driving,”

“No, I’m not,”

“Well don’t worry. See, what these do,” Kihyun takes the bottle out of his pocket and shakes it, “is they stop me from acting on every impulse that I have. Essentially they keep me under control,”

“So what are the Benzos for?”

“You’re a doctor, Changkyunnie, I would hope you know what Benzodiazepines do,”

“I know what they do, I went to med school,” He frowns, “I’m asking why you need them,”

“Well knowing my family, you might just find out,”

 

“Home sweet home,” Kihyun sighs,

“Why does your family live in Buckingham Palace?” Changkyun looks around the property in awe,

“It’s not that big,” Kihyun pulls his bag out of the boot. Changkyun raises an eyebrow and opens his mouth to say something when Kihyun adds, “it’s bigger,”

 

* * *

 

“What are _you_ doing here?” the tension in the room is thick enough to cut with a steak knife,

“Whatever do you mean, hyung?” Kihyun smirks at the sight of Woohyun’s shocked expression, “I couldn’t possibly miss my mom’s birthday,”

“You _have_ missed mom’s birthday,” Woohyun scowls, “Five years _in a row._ You have no right to be here,”

“It would appear that you’re mistaken, Kim Woohyun,” Kihyun sets his bag down, “Yoo In Young is _my_ mom, not yours. I have more right to be here than you ever will,”

“She’s _ours_ Kiki. Didn’t anyone ever teach you to share?”

Feeling the need to say something before something happens, Changkyun does the first thing he thinks of,

“I don’t believe we’ve met before,” he says, holding out a hand and trying not to make his smile look forced. He is well aware of the fact that he met Woohyun less than a week ago, but he just needed to do something to distract them because it was really starting to look like Kihyun was about to beat up his stepbrother (despite the other having a good 3 inches on him).

“You met, like, last week,” Kihyun frowns,

“Right,” Changkyun awkwardly retracts his hand,

“Why didn’t you tell me you were dating my baby brother when we met?” Woohyun smiles and Changkyun feels like it’s because he knows he’s pissed Kihyun off.

“I’m _not_ your brother and we’re the same age,”

“Why is it,” Jeongyeon sighs, coming out of nowhere, “that the two of you can’t even be in the same room without fighting?”

“It’s not my fault,” Woohyun frowns, “Ki started it,”

“I did _not—”_

“You’re first time back in over half a decade,” Kihyun turns, “and the first thing you do is start a fight with your older brother,”

“We're the same age and he’s _not_ my brother, Mr. Kim,”

The man grins, sipping his whiskey, and Changkyun finds it weird that Kihyun and his stepfather look so alike despite not actually being related. They have the same sharp features though Kihyun’s stepfather has a more square jaw and deeper set eyes and is easily at least a head and half taller than Kihyun,

“Kihyun, I thought we went over this, please refer to me as your father,”

“I don’t know why I should do that, nor will I ever, Mr Kim, considering the fact that you will _never_ be my father,”

“Listen here, you little shit—”

“Why must you two fight all of the time?” A sigh comes from the top of the staircase, “You’re stepfather is right by the way, Kihyun, I really wish you wouldn’t cause trouble so soon after setting foot back in the house,”

“Well hi to you too, mom,” Kihyun rolls his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really hope you enjoyed the chapter! Sadly, I won’t be posting any new chapters until at least next month. I’m super swamped with summer exams and projects that I have to get done, so no free time for me until June 1st :(


	18. The Fundamentals of Fake Dating pt.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changkyun catches a short glimpse into Kihyun’s life and it’s…surprising.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m back everybody. I hate exams & I’m so glad they’re over. Now that I’ve got essentially nothing to do this summer, I’m going to try to update as much as I can. That being said, enjoy the chapter
> 
>  
> 
> Date posted: 6/6/19

**“** _**Kihyun, don’t do this.** Please reconsider.”_

_“I don’t what there is to reconsider, mom. I told you, it’s him or me and you’ve clearly chosen him.”_

_she sighs in frustration, “I haven’t_ chosen _anyone, Kihyun, and I’m not going to. You can’t really expect me to choose between my husband and my son.”_

_“Fine then, I’ll choose for you,” Kihyun throws the backpack over his shoulder,_

_“Kihyun you’re being ridiculous.”_

_“Am I, mom? Am I really? Is it really so inconceivable for you to think that I don’t like your new husband because maybe, just maybe, I don’t want a new family? Maybe I don’t want to have two brothers, or a bratty younger sister. Maybe I don’t want you to be married to a man that wants to send me away the moment he gets the chance.”_

_“It wasn’t just him, Ki, we decided on it together, you know that. We were concerned about—”_

_“About whom? Because it wasn’t me, that’s for sure.”_

_“I don’t know what your talking about. I was the one who wanted you to go back to school. And who is it that’s always defending you when you get into fights with the others?”_

_“I’m hardly going to congratulate you for defending me when I do nothing wrong. I never did anything to deserve all of—”_

_“They’re scared of you, Kihyun, okay? Ri El, Woohyun and Taeyang are afraid to be near you. Do you really not care that your siblings are—”_

_“They are not my siblings.”_

_“Kihyun, I really don’t know why you’re being like this. All I want is for you to at least try to get along with them, is that really so much to ask?”_

_“But you didn’t!” Kihyun snaps, running a hand through his hair, “You’ve never once asked me about anything! You never asked me if I wanted a stepdad, or step siblings. You didn’t ask if I was okay with you getting remarried and you sure as hell didn’t ask me if I wanted to be sent away. You never asked me about any of it, and you didn’t even try to.”_

_“Kihyun I’m sorry. I thought—“ she moves to touch his face but he slaps her hand away,_

_“If you’re really sorry, you’ll let me go.”_

_“Kihyun please.”_

_“I’m going to leave, no matter what you say or do. The only thing you get to decide is how I’ll go.”_

_“I can’t just let you leave, you’re still a kid.”_

_“I’m not a child anymore, mom. I’m almost twenty two.”_

_“You’ll always be a kid to me; you’re my kid, and I love you.”_

_“Then you should know that you can’t keep me locked in our house forever.”_

_“I know that, I just…” She trails off, sitting down and rubbing her hands on her skirt, “I thought that I was protecting you, that if I kept you close I could look out for you.”_

_“I know, mom.” Kihyun sighs, giving her a hug, “But you have to trust me on this one. I just can’t be in this house anymore, it’s suffocating.”_

_“You really hate it, don’t you?”_

_“I do.”_

_“You know I love you, right?”_

_“Of course, mom. I love you too.”_

_“That’s good. Now go on,” she shoos him away, “I wouldn’t want to keep you any longer.”_

_“Really?” He tightens his hold on her, “Are you serious?”_

_“You said it yourself, you’re almost twenty two, I can’t keep you here forever.”_

_Kihyun smiles softly,_

_“I love you mom.”_

 

* * *

 

_“I know.”_

 

“I’ve missed you so much.” Kihyun smiles as his mom envelopes him in a bear hug,

“I missed you too mom, but please let me go. I actually _enjoy_ breathing.”

“Sorry,” she chuckles, stepping back a bit, “it’s just been so long.”

 _‘Oh yeah_ Changkyun thinks, _Kihyun hasn’t seen his family in five years._ Changkyun almost pities him, really. It makes him a bit sad to think that someone could go so long without seeing their family. The last time Changkyun had seen his family was maybe two weeks ago, and he already misses them like crazy; he couldn’t possibly imagine going five _years_ without them. _‘You’re one of the lucky ones. Not everyone can stay close with their family.’_ Minhyuk had said this to him a while ago, and the truth of it hits Changkyun like a punch to the gut,

“And who might you be?” Mrs. Yoo smiles at him, bringing his attention back,

“I’m Im Changkyun,” he bows awkwardly, “I’m, like, a huge fan.” it’s true. He’s been a fan of Yoo In Young since he was in college. He finds it kind of weird, now that he thinks about it, that he used to have a bit of a crush on Kihyun’s mom,

“Well, I always love meeting fans.”

“It’s true. Be careful or you might find her autographing you in the middle of the night.” Kihyun comments, making her laugh.

“No Minhyuk this year?”

“No. I guess he’s as sick of you lot as I am.”

“For as nice as that is,” she raises an eyebrow, “I’m sure driving all the way here from Seoul must have made you hungry.”

“Oh not really, Mrs. Yoo.” Changkyun smiles politely, “It was only about twenty min—”

“Changkyunnie,” Kihyun cuts him off, “one thing you’ll learn spending the weekend with my family; you never turn down an offer of food from my mom.”

“I guess that settles it.” she smiles brightly, “And Changkyun, please call me In Young rather than Mrs. Yoo, it makes me feel less old.”

“Okay Mrs.—I mean, In Young.”

“Great. You two go unpack and I’ll see if we actually have any food in the house because I don’t actually remember when the last time I went food shopping was.” she shoos them off unceremoniously, heading into what Changkyun assumes is the kitchen.

  


“Well if, after meeting my family, you want to run away, I’ll understand.” Kihyun sighs, falling back onto the bed.

“They don’t seem all that bad?” Changkyun offers, except it comes out as more of a question and he knows that his tone doesn’t convince himself, much less Kihyun.

“Wait until food time,” he says, “that’s their favourite time to pick fights with me.”

“Why?” Changkyun frowns,

“My mom has this rule that we all have to eat together ‘as a family’,” he sits up to put air quotes around the term before lying back down, “and no one’s allowed to leave so I’m forced to sit there while they purposefully antagonise me because I can’t say anything back, or else I’m ‘picking fights’,

“Of course, I kind of stopped caring about that stupid rule a while ago so I used just leave when I got pissed, but I’m going to try not to do that today because It’s my first time home in five years and I want to make my mom happy, but I don’t—” he cuts himself off when the door opens. A short-ish girl with strawberry blonde hair and low cheekbones shuffles in, holding a set of bed sheets,

“I hope I’m not disturbing anything, Master Yoo, but the Mistress insists that I should change the bedclothes because they’re ‘old’.” Changkyun senses that she wants to put air quotes around the word, “even though I changed them three weeks ago.” She adds under her breath,

“What was that?” Kihyun asks with a smile,

“Nothing.” She sets the sheets down on the corner of the bed and sighs through her nose, “I need you to stand up if I’m going to do this, Master Yoo.”

“Whatever shall I do?” He frowns in mock distress, “I’m oh so comfortable like this. I don’t think I want to stand up.”

“Master Yoo, please. Master Kim will yell at me if I don’t do as I’m told.”

“Well, if you need me to stand up so badly, you can always make me.” He smirks at this.

“Kihyun, _please.”_

“I’m sorry, what?”

Catching her mistake, she corrects herself,

“M-Master Yoo.”

“No, you called me by my name just now.”

“No I-I didn’t.”

He makes a sound somewhere between a laugh and scoff,

“Yah Meng Meiqi, you—”

“Please _stop_ ,” she’s shaking now, hands balled into fists at her sides, “this is embarrassing.”

“I don’t—”

“That’s _enough,_ hyung.” Changkyun snaps, feeling bad for the poor girl, “We should go downstairs, I actually am quite hungry.” He grabs Kihyun by the wrist, essentially dragging him out.

 

* * *

 

“What was that for?” Kihyun frowns, trailing behind Changkyun.

“I should be asking you that. What supposed transgression did she commit against you to deserve that?”

“Nothing really,” Kihyun shrugs, “I just like making her uncomfortable.”

“Why?”

“I mean, she’s uncomfortable around me anyhow. It’s just fun to tease her.”

“Why is she uncomfortable around you?”

“I fucked her once,”

Changkyun stops at the top of the stairs, causing Kihyun to run into him and almost knock them both over,

“I’m sorry, _what_?”

“It was one time and, like, fourteen years ago. She was almost fired, but Woohyun wanted to keep her on just to spite me.” He sidesteps Changkyun and continues down the stairs, “I figure, if she’s going to be like that anyway, I might as well have some fun with it.”

“That doesn’t seem very—”

“There you two are.” In Young smiles at the base of the stairs, rubbing her hands against her skirt, “as it turns out, we actually don’t have any food, so who wants to go food shopping with me?

“Changkyun will, won’t you?” Kihyun smiles at him, “It’ll be a great way to bond with my mom, the two of you can gossip about me.”

“What do you say, Changkyun?” She holds a hand out to him, wiggling her fingers slightly. Changkyun shrugs,

“Okay.”

  


“So Changkyun, how did you and Kihyun meet?” In Young turns over a tomato in her hand.

“Um, well we met in a bar about three years ago.” It’s not a lie. They really did meet in a bar, he’s just glossing over the whole ‘they broke up two years ago’ bit (not like that’s important, or anything).

“I’ll get straight to the point, Changkyun,” she leads him down the vegetable aisle, “If you’ve been with Kihyun for three years, you should probably know by now that he’s…not like most people.”

“I know. I was surprised to find out, he always seemed so normal…”

“That’s Kihyun’s charm.” She smiles sadly, “He draws you in, and when you _think_ you’re getting to know him, he—” she cuts herself off with a sigh, “I _thought_ that if I could keep him close to me, I could somehow protect him from the world. But, when he kept rebelling and pushing me away, I didn’t know what to do.”

“Is that why you sent him away?” Changkyun regrets asking that when he sees the sadness cross In Young’s face.

“I thought it was best for him, for everyone. I thought it would protect him. But, looking back on it, maybe it wasn’t _him_ I was trying to protect, but rather…” she trails off, but Changkyun knows where she’s going,

“Rather, it was everyone else you were trying to protect _from_ him, wasn’t it?”

“You’re quite smart, Changkyun.”

“It’s not that, just…Minhyuk hyung seems to have the same intentions as you.”

“Ah, Minhyuk. He’s a good kid on the inside. When Kihyun left home, he promised to look out for him. And he’s done a good job of it, for the most part, but even he lets his guard down sometimes…”

“Are you, perhaps, talking about Min Yoongi?”

“So you know?”

“I met him, a long time ago. He really hates Kihyun hyung, but I can hardly blame him; I would hate someone who tried to kill me as well.”

“Out of curiosity, if you know about Yoongi, and what happened to him, what made you stay with Kihyun?”

_Nothing. We broke up that week._

“I don’t…well, I love him. I know he did a bad thing, but I love him all the same; I can’t imagine being without him anymore.” Somebody give this boy a fucking Oscar because if that wasn’t the best acting Changkyun has ever done in his life, then he doesn’t know what is.

“Well, on a lighter note, what kind of ice cream do you want?” She smiles,

“Vanilla, definitely vanilla.”


	19. The Fundamentals of Fake Dating pt.3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changkyun finds it important to note that he has no feelings for Kihyun, whatsoever. Absolutely none…right?

**“I’m just saying** , I feel like vanilla is a severely under appreciated flavour, especially for ice cream.” Changkyun chuckles as In Young pushes the front door open with her hip,

“And I’m just saying, you could stand to add a bit of variety to your ice cream life.”

“Where’s Kihyun hyung? He’ll back me up on this. You know–” he’s cut off by the sound of breaking glass and a shriek coming from the kitchen. In Young goes pale and drops the shopping bags.

 

“I  _ despise  _ you.” Kihyun glares at Woohyun, breathing heavily,

“O-Oppa, your h-hand…” Jeongyeon stutters, staring at Kihyun’s hand, which is badly cut and dripping blood from the glass on the counter. Changkyun isn’t entirely sure if he wants to know, but he feels a need to ask,

“What happened?”

“They’re fighting. Like always.” Jeongyeon says and Changkyun swears he can see her shaking, he walks around the counter and gently lifts Kihyun’s hand from the shards,

“Hyung, what–” the sound of Changkyun’s voice seems to snap Kihyun out of whatever headspace he’s in. He looks away from Woohyun and at Changkyun, his gaze softening into something that Changkyun never seen before. This isn’t a look Kihyun gave to his mom and it wasn’t a look he gave to Minhyuk. It was a look for Changkyun, and only Changkyun, and it’s accompanied with a realisation that makes his stomach churn. He opens his mouth to say something when a door flies open, and Kihyun’s stepfather comes in,

“Ninety minutes,” he says, “you’ve been here for ninety minutes and yet you’re already making a mess. Is that all you know how to do?”

“Maybe it is.” Kihyun snaps, eyes hardening, “Maybe the only thing I’m good is making messes that you get clean up. So what? What are you going to do about it now? I’m not seventeen anymore, you can’t just send me away when you get sick of me.”

“You’ll never let that go, will you? You can’t blame me for that forever, eventually you’ll have to realise that the person responsible for that was you.” Kihyun’s hands ball into fists and Changkyun wants to tell him to relax his left hand because he just knows that Kihyun got glass shards in it and it’s literally dripping with blood, but he decides against it, too caught up in the tension between Kihyun and his stepfather, “You never want to take responsibility for your own actions and always want someone else to blame. You have so many different people, who aren’t you, to blame for the fact that you’re so screwed up, you blame me for your getting sent away. You blame everyone but yourself, and throw your little temper tantrums when things don’t work out.”

“That’s why,” Changkyun feels Kihyun shake with rage, “that’s why I left in the first place. Call it a tantrum if you want, but I left for a reason, and clearly I shouldn’t have come back.” He looks over at In Young with a sigh, “coming here was a mistake.” He pulls his hand out of Changkyun’s grasp and storms out. Changkyun rolls his eyes and sighs. Why is he so dramatic?

  
  


“You aren’t really leaving, are you?” Changkyun frowns as Kihyun throws himself onto the mattress and groans in frustration,

“Constantly,  _ constantly,”  _ he mutters to himself, “he’s always picking fights and I’m always the bad guy,”

“Hyung, relax.” He sighs when Kihyun stands up and starts pacing, “You can’t go.”

“Why not? You should be glad I want to leave, now you don’t have to deal with me and my screwed up family.”

“Honestly, you’re right; I don’t really want to be here right now, and I would love to leave. But we’re here now and, like it or not, we’re staying.”

“Why? Why is this so important to you? You don’t even want to be here.”

“Maybe not but I’ll be damned if I’m about to let you drag me all the way here for nothing. I’m here in this fake relationship, pretending that I’m oh so in love with you as a favour to Minhyuk hyung because I know he genuinely cares about you. So even if you don’t like your family, the least you could do is put with them for three days, even if it’s for the people who care about you.”

“I…” Kihyun falters and stops, “people?”

“What?” Changkyun blinks at him confusedly,

“You said people—the people who care about me.”

“And?” What is he saying right now?

“You only mentioned Minhyuk, a single person, as someone who cares about me, but you said ‘the  _ people  _ who care about me’, which implies there are more than one.”

“I don’t…Well, I mean, I’m sure your mom cares about you too. She’d probably hate to see you leave not even a day after seeing each other again after five years. Her and Minhyuk makes two people doesn’t it?”

“Well yeah, but–”

“Don’t worry too much about that. Instead, you should probably worry about your hand.”

Kihyun hums, raising his hand to look at it. There’s blood running down his arm and dripping onto the floor,

“Oh yeah, this.” He sighs, rotating his hand to get a better look,

“Does it not…hurt?” Changkyun frowns. Should someone be this nonchalant about an injury like that?

“What?” Kihyun looks at him,

“Your hand. Doesn’t it hurt?”

“Yeah, no, it hurts like shit, I am in an excruciating amount of pain right now.” 

Changkyun resists the urge to chuckle,

“I’ve never seen someone act so carefree about being in intense pain.”

“That’s just how I am.” Kihyun checks his watch and sighs, “Speaking of my being screwed up, I should probably take my stupid Benzos,” he holds out a hand to Changkyun, who frowns in confusion before remembering that he’s been entrusted with Kihyun’s medication,

“Why do you hate taking them so much?”

“It’s not that I  _ hate _ them…” he falters, “Well, I do hate them, but I hate all of my meds.”

“Why?”

“It’s a constant reminder that there’s something wrong with me, I hate it. But I can hardly stop taking them, now can I?”

“Why not?”

“If it were up to me, I wouldn’t even take them, but I know Minhyuk would lose his mind if I stopped.” He sighs, “I feel bad about being friends with him sometimes; he’s such a good person on the inside, but he’s always doing bad things to protect me. I think he’d be better off with me.”

“Then, why are you still friends with him?” Changkyun frowns in confusion when Kihyun smiles,

“Because I’m selfish like that.”

 

* * *

 

“He’s not…leaving is he?” Changkyun jumps slightly when In Young pops out from behind the counter with a dustpan full of glass,

“No, I convinced him to stay. I don’t even think he was actually going to leave, I think he was just angry.”

“He gets like that sometimes, when he loses his temper. I always try to encourage the others to avoid picking fights with him, but Woohyun and my husband just love to rile him up on purpose.”

“Why is that?”

“Hell if I know,” she sighs sadly, “Kihyun and his brother have been fighting pretty much since the day they met. I think my husband tends to pick fights with Kihyun because he feels like he has to side with Woohyun. I wish they could get along better, I used to try to get them to spend time together, but I gave up on that when Kihyun left home. On a less depressing note, what brings you down here?”

“Right. Do you keep a first aid kit in this house?”

“Why do you—oh right, Kihyun’s hand. Uhm, I think we actually might have one in Kihyun’s room. He used to break things a lot, so we just started keeping one in there for convenience.”

“Right. Thank you Mrs—I mean, In Young-ssi,” he starts out the door before turning back on his heel, “You know, In Young-ssi, I know it may not look it right now, but I can tell that Kihyun hyung is making an effort for you.”

“How can you be sure of that?”

“Hyung tends to do what he wants, when he wants. The fact that he hasn’t left yet, the fact that he came here at all. If he didn’t want to be here, you couldn’t get him to come if you paid him.”

In Young smiles,

“Thank you, Changkyun.”

“For what?” He frowns,

“For coming here, I know this probably isn’t an ideal way for you to spend a weekend. But also for being so good to my son. I can tell he has a soft spot for you.”

“Do you really think so?”

“I know so. I can see it in the way he looks at you.”

Changkyun forces a smile and pretends like the very thought of Kihyun doesn’t make him feel sick to his stomach.

 

 

“It hurts.” Kihyun whines, reflexively pulling his hand away. Changkyun catches his wrist and brings him closer,

“Well, you can either be in pain for five minutes, or risk getting an infection that might require surgery or amputation. It’s your choice.” He raises an eyebrow when Kihyun huffs and turns his head away,

“Whatever.” He pouts,

“I’ve already gotten the glass out, so just be patient while I clean and bandage it, okay hyung?”

“Yes sir.” He smiles,

“Gross.” Changkyun frowns, “ please don’t treat me like I’m your boyfriend when your family isn’t around.”

“You’re so mean to me,” the pout returns and Changkyun ignores the voice in the back of his mind telling him that it’s cute,

“That’s because I don’t like you.” Changkyun says coolly, securing a bandage around his hand, 

“Give it to me straight, Doc,” Kihyun says, his other hand placed dramatically across his forehead, “Will I make it?”

Changkyun rolls his eyes, ignoring Kihyun’s antics,

“How does it feel? Too loose? Too tight?”

“It’s perfect.” 

“You’re lucky. All of the cuts were pretty shallow, so it should heal well enough on it’s own. If they were deeper, or if I weren’t a medical professional, you would have to go to a hospital.”

“Thank you Doctor Changkyun.” 

Something about the tone of Kihyun’s voice makes him stop,

“Why—” he’s floored for the second time when he gets a sudden kiss on the cheek, “I…what?” He feels himself start to blush and hopes it’s not too obvious to Kihyun,

“A token of my appreciation.” He says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Changkyun scoffs with a small smile,

“I’m getting really sick of you and your dumb little games,” he mutters, 

“What do you mean?” Kihyun frowns innocently,

“Well, if you’re going to try and screw with me,” he cups the back of Kihyun’s neck, “then you had better fucking commit to it.” He pulls the older in for a  _ proper  _ kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Date posted: 18/6/19


	20. The Fundamentals of Fake Dating pt.4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changkyun doesn’t like Kihyun. That’s why he hates that he’s starting to see the human side of him. He doesn’t like that he might be starting to understand the older, because he’s afraid that if he understands Kihyun, he’ll stop hating him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Date posted: 26/6/19

**Kihyun can honestly** say he’s a bit caught off guard when Changkyun kisses him. Don’t get him wrong, it’s not like he didn’t want it—he did—it was just a surprise. Now, admittedly, he was kind of baiting Changkyun into doing it, but still. He’s not going to lie, Kihyun sometimes wishes he were more…well, more normal. Then Changkyun wouldn’t have to pretend he hates him. Kihyun knows Changkyun doesn’t hate him, he’s sure Changkyun himself knows that he doesn’t hate Kihyun. Then, why is this so complicated? They both know Changkyun doesn’t hate him, and it was never a question whether Kihyun did or didn’t like Changkyun, so why can’t they just get back together? Why did they even break up in the first place? Kihyun doesn’t think he did anything _that bad_ . Okay, so _technically_ speaking, gaslighting constitutes ‘emotional abuse’ (insert eye roll). But, in Kihyun’s defence, he didn’t know what else to do. He’s not good at the whole ‘human emotions’ thing, he doesn’t know how to show affection, hurting people is the only thing he’s good at. Sure, there’s Minhyuk and Dowoon, and Taeyang, and his mom, but he’s known Minhyuk and his mom his whole life, and he’s known Dowoon and Taeyang for a long time as well. Changkyun is new, and different, and he’s not supposed to make Kihyun feel this way. Kihyun wonders what he would have done, if he could have seen this coming. If, three years ago when they met, he had known that he would feel feelings he hasn’t felt in two decades. Would he do anything different? Would he have left him alone, called a taxi, or Minhyuk to pick him up from the bar, and not given him a second thought? Would he have treated him better? Forgone all of the games and manipulation and just cherished their time together? He doesn’t know. All he knows right now is that he’s getting a kiss from Changkyun and he doesn’t ever want it to stop.

 

Kihyun frowns when Changkyun pushes him away,

“I’m sorry,” he sighs, “I shouldn’t have done that.”

“I don’t mind.”

“Well, it’s not about you.” Changkyun frowns, “It’s about me, and I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Well, if you only think about what you should do, you’ll forget about what you want to do.”

“What?”

“I mean, we’ve established that you shouldn’t have kissed me, but you have yet to say that you didn’t _want_ to.”

“That’s beside the point.”

“Then what is the point?”

“The point is that we can’t get back together. Ever.”

“Why not?”

“Because I just can’t let you hurt me again!” Changkyun snaps,

“What?” Kihyun looks genuinely confused and Changkyun bites back a scoff,

“Yeah, believe it or not, it hurt me when I found out my boyfriend was manipulating me.”

“I…” okay, he does have a point, “okay, that’s fair enough. But I want it to be different this time around. I want to just hang out, and eat pizza and cuddle on the sofa until midnight, and all the lame couple stuff.”

Changkyun shakes his head,

“Forget it. There is no way I’m letting you back into my life. I can’t get hurt again, I _won’t_ get hurt again.”

“I get that, but—”

“You know what, Kihyun? When we get back to Seoul, don’t ever speak to me again, I mean it this time.”  He packs away the first aid kit and leaves on a drawer, “I can’t do this anymore, it’s just not worth my energy. _You_ are not worth my energy, not anymore.”

 

* * *

 

Okay, so admittedly Changkyun may not have the best forethought. If he were a bit more rational, he probably wouldn’t have stormed off after snapping at Kihyun because, looking around the hallway, Changkyun belatedly realises that he’s gotten himself lost. Hindsight being 20/20 and all that jazz, he probably should have just gone to one of the two areas of the house, that weren’t Kihyun’s room, that he actually knew. So anyway, Changkyun is lost.

“Why must you antagonise him?” Changkyun stops, “It’s like you’re _trying_ to push him away.” Looking through a crack in the door, he sees In Young fighting with Kihyun’s stepfather. (Side note, Changkyun realises that he should probably find out his name.)

“Oh come on, you can’t really be buying his act. You don’t hear from him for five years, then he, all of a sudden, cares right when you’re about to stop sending him money? He’s so obviously here for the money and you’re the only one who doesn’t see that.”

“I don’t care about that,” she snaps, “I care that you push my son away and treat him like shit.”

“I do not. I’m a lot nicer to him than I think he deserves.”

“Oh, so I guess he hates you for no reason then,”

“No, he hates me because I call him out on his bullshit. You know just as well as I do that he’s dangerous.”

“He’s not _dangerous_. He’s just a bit unpredictable.”

“Unpredictable?” He raises an eyebrow “In Young, he tried to kill someone and had you and that kid cover it up for him.”

“ _That kid_ has a name, it’s Minhyuk, and that was under a circumstance that won’t happen again.”

“You claim it won’t, but let’s be honest; Min Yoongi is not the first person that Kihyun has tried to kill. He was just lucky enough to survive.”

“Don’t you _dare_ bring Ara into this.”

Changkyun frowns. Who’s Ara? He doesn’t think he’s met her before because he definitely remember—wait. What did he say? ‘ _Min Yoongi is not the first person that Kihyun has tried to kill.’_

“I’m sorry, but you know Kihyun isn’t the most stable of people. I mean, how long did he terrorise Taeyang before he did a one-eighty and decided they were as close as biological siblings?”

In Young groans in frustration,

“Why must trying to get you and Kihyun to get along always be like pulling teeth? One conversation. All I want is for the two of you to have _one_ conversation where you don’t pick a fight and he doesn’t storm off. Is that really so much to ask?”

“I’ve tried to talk to him, but he gets pissed at me regardless of what I say. That kid is a lost cause, I don’t know why you bother inviting him anymore.”

“You know, I can accept that you don’t like my son, but the least you could do is not intentionally push him away from me.”

“I’m sorry. You know I tried to get along with him, but he’s hated me literally since we met. I think I made it worse when we had our first fight.”

“Yeah, I remember that,” a scowl settles on her face, “and if you, so help me god, _ever_ put your hands on my son, or either of my kids, again…this marriage is over.”

 

* * *

 

It’s weird, Changkyun thinks, how everyone in Kihyun’s family can pretend so well. Even though he snapped at him earlier, Kihyun holds Changkyun’s hand as they stroll into the dining hall, (the sheer vastness of the house never ceasing to amaze him). He smiles at Changkyun and gives him kisses on the cheek with such ease that you would never think that they had fought less than two hours ago. The same can be said about Kihyun’s mom and stepfather (he still needs to learn his name). Despite the fact he saw them fight, and In Young threaten end their marriage, you wouldn’t see anything but a happy couple if you looked at them. They’re all sweet smiles and easy laughter, he even pulls out her chair for her. Changkyun honestly doesn’t know how they can act like nothing is wrong when—

“You know, I find the best way to eat food is to actually put it _in_ your mouth.” Kihyun nudges Changkyun with his elbow,

“What?” Changkyun looks up from his plate, which he had been absentmindedly picking at, not eating anything, and accidentally makes eye contact with Jeongyeon across the table, she flashes him a smile which he returns

“So, what’s up with you, space cadet?”

“It’s nothing, just thinking.”

“That’s nice.”

“Kihyun-ah,” In Young sighs, “Jeongyeon-ah,” they both turn to her,

“What is it?” Kihyun frowns,

“Yeah, what has Kihyun oppa done now?”

He shoots her a glare as Woohyun chuckles beside her,

“Jeongyeon stop that, your brother hasn’t done anything,”

“So what’s up?”

“Your father is getting remarried.”

Jeongyeon drops her spoon and Changkyun feels Kihyun tense beside him,

“The two of you are coming with me to the wedding.” Kihyun opens his mouth, but In Young cuts him off, “This is not negotiable, do not argue with me. Woohyun and Ri El, the two of you don’t have to go if you don’t want to. Taeyang doesn’t have to go either, if he’s discharged before the wedding. ”

“Okay.” Ri El shrugs, turning her attention back to her soup,

“Why do we have to go?” Kihyun whines,

“Because, like it or not, he’s still your biological father and you’re going.”

“But—”

“There’s going to be an official announcement on Monday and it’s important that the two of you—”

“So that’s the real reason we have to go.”

“What?”

“You don’t even care about his stupid wedding,” he clenches his hands into fists in his lap, “you just want to put on a show.”

“Kihyun that’s ridiculous,” she scoffs, “why would I even do that?”

“I don’t know, you tell me. Does it not make perfect sense? He’s the one who cheated and you’re just so kind as show up to his wedding? It makes you look amazing, and it makes him look like even more of an asshole.”

“Kihyun, stop it.”

“Why? Does it make you feel bad that I saw right through your little scheme? Don’t feel too bad though, it was a good plan. You would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for those meddling kids. I mean, why else would you force us to go see dear old dad get married to a girl—not woman, _girl_ —who’s almost a year and a half younger than I am? You want me to go? Fine. But I’m not going to pretend that I’m particularly happy about it.”

“It’s…on the twenty second.”

“Twenty second of…?”

“Of November.”

Kihyun slams a hand down on the table, causing everyone to jump,

“Are you kidding me right now?”

Changkyun frowns, what’s wrong with the…oh,

“Kihyun, calm down,”

“No, I’m pissed. How dare he?”

“Oppa, it’s not a big deal. It—” he cuts Jeongyeon off,

“It _is_ a big deal that he’s getting remarried _on_ _my birthday_. I would say he’s done it on purpose, but I don’t think he even _knows_ when my birthday is.”

“Kihyun, I asked him to change the date, but the invitations have already been sent out and the only other date available was in February.” In Young sighs, “I mean, your grandmother is flying in from France to be there, so we can hardly ask her to change flights now.”

“And yet she couldn’t fly in for her own daughter’s birthday?”

“That’s _enough_ , Kihyun.”

He sits back in his chair, crosses his arms and pouts,

“This is going to be the worst birthday ever. I’ve to see my shithead dad, his girlfriend who’s young enough to be my sister, and that _whore,”_

“ _Kihyun,_ don’t talk about your sister like that.”

He scoffs,

“She’s no sister of mine.”

“That’s not very nice.”

“ _Please._ What wasn’t ‘nice’ was for her to just walk out on you to live with dad after everything he put you through. It wasn’t very _nice_ of her to buy her alcoholic mom a bottle of whiskey for her birthday. But you know what wasn’t _very nice_ of her? When she blamed _you_ for your own divorce and called you a bitch and a slut for, and this a direct quote, ‘being too ugly and boring to make dad want to stay’. That wasn’t very nice of her, now was it? So excuse me if I’m not very nice to her because she’s not very nice to you, is she?”

“That may be the case,” In Young says calmly, Changkyun notices that her facial expression hasn’t changed since she first spoke, “but I still expect you to be on your absolute _best_ behaviour. Am I understood?”

Kihyun huffs. Changkyun frowns at the older. He looks like he’s thinking about something, but he has this blank look on his face and it’s seriously creeping Changkyun out. Kihyun puts his hands on the edge of the table and Changkyun knows—he’s not sure _how_ he knows, but he just knows—that he’s about to leave. Remembering his words from earlier _‘I’m going to try not to do that today because it’s my first time home in five years and I want to make my mom happy’,_ Changkyun reaches out and grabs Kihyun’s upper thigh, effectively holding him in place. They make eye contact, each conveying a message without saying any words,

_You can’t leave_

_Thank you_

 

And they just stay like that for the rest of the dinner. And Kihyun is completely relaxed; he doesn’t snap at anyone, he doesn’t even say anything. He just sits quietly in his seat and eats. And Changkyun just keeps his hand on Kihyun’s thigh, and (not that he would ever admit it, except maybe at gunpoint) it’s weirdly relaxing for him.


End file.
